Hope for Eternity
by MistressNobody
Summary: Bella and Edward are best friends, but she can't help but be in love with him. One problem: Edward has a girlfriend! What's Bella to do? AU, AH, Bella x Edward.
1. Just Like Family

**A/N: Okay, trying out a Twilight fanfic this time. Let me know what you guys think!

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**Present Day – Twenty years old**

I feel a hand run across my bare back under the baggy t-shirt I'm wearing, and it makes a small smile flutter onto my face. Don't get excited, the body attached to that hand doesn't belong to my lover, it belongs to my best friend. Well... a girl can still dream, though.

"Mmmm... you still give the best back rubs." I hear him chuckle quietly under his breath. The man had a voice like velvet, and could melt me in an instant, not that he knew it. He places a kiss on the back of my head, while pulling the comforter tighter around my body.

"Is your headache gone now?" I can hear a small hint of worry in his voice.

"Yeah, it's gone." I almost wish I'd said 'no' so that he would stay longer with me. Nobody could make me feel better than he could.

"You sure you're ok? I need to take off soon." I smile to myself as I picture him in training, which was where he would be headed next. Edward had just recently graduated from the firefighting program at the local college, and I had to admit, I had never seen a better looking firefighter in all my life.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Go train up to be a hero." He chuckles again, and ruffles my hair with his big, strong hand. What I wouldn't give to really feel the strength of those hands... _Down, Bella. Be a good girl_. I turn my head so that I can watch him as he strolls out my bedroom door, knowing that he'd do the protective-guy thing and make sure the apartment was locked up behind him.

Ugh. I'm such an idiot. I am truly one of those women stupid enough to fall in love with her best friend of eleven years. And, worse yet, he had a girlfriend. A girlfriend I hated, but a girlfriend nonetheless. Life sucks sometimes. I close my eyes, and think about the first time we met.

**Nine years old**

"_Hi." I almost stab myself with the needle of the embroidery I'm working on. _

"_Uh... hi." I look at the boy quizzically. The first thing I notice is how vibrantly green his eyes are... it's like staring into two pretty stones. His hair shines a little with the hazy light coming in through the window behind me. Everyone's inside because it's raining too hard to go out for recess. It's a strange sort of red colour that makes me hate my brown locks all the more. He points at my sewing and smiles._

"_My mom does that too."_

"_Sewing?" He nods his head enthusiastically._

"_Yeah." That seems strange to me; my own mother couldn't sew to save her life at all. I wasn't too sure where I had picked it up from. _

"_Um... that's neat." Geez, Bella, could you sound anymore lame? He smiles at me some more. _

"_My name's Edward Cullen." _

"_Um, I'm Bella... Bella Swan." He smiles again, gives me a small wave, and then turns back toward the group of boys on the far side of the room._

**Present Day**

"Seriously, Bells... get your ass in gear." I roll my eyes at my best girl friend and roommate, Alice. We're getting ready to go over to small get-together at Edward's place. Herein lies the problem: I want to be me and wear my jeans and Beatles t-shirt, but Alice wants me to dress up. "I mean, come on, you're never gonna steal him away if you don't put an effort into it." Alice is, of course, fully aware of my idiotic love for my best friend, and in her own little way is trying to help me.

I give in, and let it be Bella-Barbie time. By the time she's done, I'm wearing a form-fitting black long sleeved t-shirt with a wide neck that shows off my bare shoulders, and hip-hugging jeans. Alice has drawn my hair up into some kind of messy bun thing on the back of my head, with a few tendrils falling down to frame my face.

"See, you look hot. And not slutty-hot, either. Just hot-hot." She smiles so wide that it's hard for me to be mad at her for the torture she just put me through.

"Alright, alright. Can we go now? We're going to be late."

The Cullen house has been like a second home to me, ever since that fateful day when we were nine. Edward still lived at home with his mother; ever since his dad died, he's felt responsible for taking care of her and his two younger brothers, Emmett and Jasper. The three boys were all really close in age, and got along so well that they were more like best friends than brothers. I had always been treated like part of the family, and I really felt like the boys were my brothers as well.

I walked up to the front door, and walked in without bothering to knock, which seemed to startle Alice. She'd never been here before, so she didn't really know that this was normal behaviour when it came to me and this family. I had been told that I didn't need to knock since pretty much the beginning. Inside the house, we could hear voices coming from the kitchen. I stepped as lightly as I could down the hallway, to peek my head into the kitchen before anyone noticed us.

Emmett and his girlfriend, Rosalie, were sitting at the kitchen table with Jasper. Edward stood at the sink peeling potatoes while his mother, Esme, stirred something on the stove. All of them wore happy smiles and were joking with each other back and forth. Seeing this kind of scene always warmed my heart, but also made me ache a little that I couldn't fully be a part of it. As much as they all treated me like family, it didn't take away the knowledge of the fact that I wasn't really.

I stood with my shoulder leaned on the door frame, waiting for one of them to notice me there, while Alice stood silent and a little confused behind me. I didn't have to wait long.

"BELLA!!!" Emmett called out excitedly, and bounded out of his chair over to me. I found myself caught up in a gigantic bear hug (which seemed appropriate because Emmett was really built like a grizzly), and he swung me easily around in circles. Compared to all of these boys, I was tiny. He gave me a smacking kiss on my cheek and went to go and sit with Rosalie again. She always tolerated this behaviour, because she had learned long ago that all I really was to them was the sister they never had.

Jasper came over to me next, ruffled my hair as a hello and gave me a significantly gentler hug than Emmett's. I could tell when he spotted Alice, because one of his finely sculpted eyebrows shot up and he said, "Well, hello."

I had to silently smile to myself. I had known for awhile that Jasper and Alice would make a great pair, and that was one reason that I had pushed so hard for her to come to dinner at Edward's with me tonight. I shot Edward a look, and he winked at me, as if he knew what I had done. I left Jasper and Alice to make their own introductions as I went to the stove to say hello to Esme. She stopped her stirring in order to hold out her arms to me, and I reveled in the quiet welcoming that she always gave me. Whenever things had been hard in my life, Esme had always been there for me.

Edward came up behind me, and tugged on the jacket I was still wearing.

"Take your coat off, stay awhile." He joked. I smiled and allowed him to slip the jacket from my shoulders. As my (or rather, Alice's) outfit was revealed, Emmett jokingly let out a wolf-whistle, and Alice smiled a devilish smile.

"Since when you dress like that?!" He yelled across the kitchen at me. I could feel my cheeks heat with the damnable blush that I could never escape from.

"What? I'm not allowed to dress up once and awhile?" I shot back defensively. Alice's grin just got wider.

"I think you look lovely, Dear." Esme was always so supportive. I turned to glance at Edward, and saw one of his perfect eyebrows raise.

"Nice." He muttered, before turning to take my jacket to the closet in the hall. My cheeks got just a little bit hotter. Edward only muttered when he was embarrassed or nervous. I took over at the stove for Esme, while she concentrated on a different part of dinner. I let the conversation of the rest of the people around me float in and out of my subconscious while I stirred, until the jarring note of the doorbell ringing brought me back. I glanced at the table while Edward took off down the hall.

"Ugh," Grimaced both Emmett and Jasper. "_She's_ here." They both frowned, and then glanced at me, while I studiously ignored everything and stared at the stove.

"Like, oh my God, Bella's here." I mentally cringed at the voice. "I thought you said this was _family_ dinner, Edward." I saw Esme roll her eyes, as Jasper and Emmett frowned even more.

"She is family, Tanya. You know that." Edward's quiet assertion both lightened my mood, because he had defended me to his girlfriend, but also caused a quick shaft of hurt to go through me... because he saw me as _family_. But, beggars can't be choosers. If being 'family' meant that I could stay by his side, then I would take it.


	2. Trees and Chains

I'd like to say that dinner went off without a hitch, but Tanya's presence had driven me to the point of wanting to commit murder by the end of the meal. Really, I had no idea what Edward saw in such a vacuous bimbo as her. The snotty remarks she had shot at me over the dinner table all night had even made Esme look uncomfortable, and she was a hard one to unnerve. Edward glanced at me apologetically every so often, while at the same time trying to subtly get her to behave. Someone really needed to tell him that 'subtle' was not going to work with this girl.

The highlight of the night was in getting to watch Alice and Jasper get to know each other. It seemed that I had been right in my hunch that they would get along great, and by the time midnight had rolled around she was sitting beside him with his arm across the back of the couch over her shoulders. Alice looked a little bit dazed, which surprised me, because the little pixie normally could make the Energizer Bunny tired. I was happy to see it work out so well for the two of them. It wasn't only for Alice; Jasper was like a brother to me, and I knew that Alice would be the kind of girl that he deserved.

Edward leaned over to whisper into my ear, his hot breath making me want to shiver. "Very sneaky of you, Bells. Playing matchmaker for my brother now?" I sent him a secretive smile, which was soon wiped off my face when I saw the murderous look on Tanya's. He must have seen the direction of my gaze, and my disappearing smile, because he turned around without another word and began chatting with her.

**Eleven years old**

"_C'mon, Bella! It's fun!" I gazed up at Edward in the tree above me, and gulped. It was too high up, it was scary. I shook my head. "Here, I'll help you." He jumped back down to the ground, and cupped his hands together. "Step on my hands, and jump up!" I took a deep breath, and he helped launch me up into the tree before scrabbling up after me. We climbed higher and higher, until we were almost at the top. I gazed at the canal below us, while I hung onto the branch for dear life._

"_Hey, Bella..." I glanced over at him while his emerald eyes sparkled. He pulled out his little pocket knife, and grinned at me._

"_What's that for, Edward?" He grinned even wider, and turned to face the tree trunk. He plied the blade of his little knife to the trunk, and I watched with rapt attention as the letters that made up our initials were carved into the tree._

"_See, we're going to be best friends forever!" He said excitedly. "Now you have to climb the tree again with me so that you can see this!" I laughed a little bit while he added a little plus sign in between our initials._

"_Edward, you're supposed to do stuff like that with your girlfriend!" I laughed. He shot me a look, which seemed a little confused._

"_You're a girl, and you're my friend, aren't you?" He put his knife away and surveyed his handy work with a proud grin. I felt a little flutter of my heart in my chest, but didn't realize just what it meant. "Hey, Bella..." He said again. "D'you think we're old enough to start liking people?" I shot him a confused look._

"_I don't know..." I said. "My daddy says that I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend until I'm at least twelve." Edward grinned._

"_A whole 'nother year away? So does that mean I can still keep you as my best friend for another year?" I knew he was teasing me, so I decided to tease him back._

"_Why don't you just be my boyfriend when we're twelve and keep me forever?" We both laughed, and I stuck my tongue out at him as he helped me down out of the tree._

**Present Day**

Tanya had to leave when her dad came to get her at one o'clock in the morning. I mentally shook my head as I could her a furiously whispered conversation between the two of them at the front door. That was one thing that weirded me out about their relationship; Tanya was still seventeen, not quite at her eighteenth birthday, and Edward would be turning twenty-one soon. I know that normally a three-year age gap was no big deal, but when it straddles between teenage and adult, it creeps me out a little. I wondered how Emmett felt about his oldest brother dating someone that was still a bit younger than him.

After we heard the slamming of the front door, Edward rejoined us and heaved a tired sigh that we all pretended not to hear. Poor baby looked so worn out, I knew what he was going to want. Without a word, I dropped one of the throw pillows from the couch onto the floor in front of me, in between my legs. He immediately sat down on the cushion, and I began to massage his tight neck and shoulders. With a little sigh, he closed his eyes. I continued to talk to Esme and the rest of the family while I worked on relaxing him, and they didn't bat an eye over our behaviour. Things had always been like this between me and Edward. For as long as I could remember, we were always hugging each other and other things like that. We were both just very touchy people. He hooked his arms over my knees, and gripped the backs of my calves while I moved my fingers up to his temples in order to massage away the headache I could see he had.

"Hey, Bells." Emmett called from the armchair he sat in, with Rosalie perched on his lap. It's pretty late for you and Alice to be driving, right? Why don't the two of you just stay here tonight?" I shot a look at Alice, and saw that she looked a little excited. Apparently, she wanted to stay.

"Where would you put us?" I questioned. Normally when I stayed over, I just stayed in Edward's bed with him. Esme didn't have a problem with that, because she knew things weren't like _that_ between us. But, with Alice here, I didn't want to abandon her.

"Alice could stay in my room." Jasper put forward. Esme sent him a steady look that said there was no way that was going to happen. Alice smiled a cheery grin at that.

"I can crash on the couch, it doesn't bother me at all!" She assured. Esme smiled, and I mentally applauded Alice's tact. That would definitely get her some brownie points with their mother. I glanced down at Edward, then back at Alice.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" I asked. I'd definitely rather spend the night in Edward's bed with him, but if she wanted me with her to feel more comfortable, I would. She sent me a grin, as if she knew what was going through my head.

"Oh no, don't change anything from how you guys normally operate, it's totally fine by me! Oh! Plus, me and Bella could make you guys breakfast tomorrow!" _Make that score two for Alice_, I thought to myself as the boys all cheered that idea. Yep, she's definitely going to fit in fine with this family. We all said our goodnights to each other, and Edward and I started up the stairs to his room. After so many years of staying together, I didn't really feel awkward about it at all anymore, but my heart always fluttered in my chest a little whenever he stripped down for bed.

Good lord, firefighting was good for him. I tried valiantly not to stare at his washboard abs while I unhooked the button on my jeans. Edward turned around with his unbuttoned jeans hanging indecently low on his hips to hand me one of his t-shirts to sleep in. I quickly stripped while his back was turned and threw the t-shirt on, which was so huge that it fell to mid-thigh on me. Too late, I remembered that Alice had forced me into lacy little hipsters instead of my normal underwear. Oh well, he probably wouldn't notice. I crawled into his single-sized bed, and after stripping to his boxers he followed me under the covers. Since the bed was small enough to be a bit of a tight squeeze with two people, we had gotten used to falling asleep on our sides, usually with our backs to each other.

I drifted off to sleep, thinking of us.

**Twelve years old**

"_Happy Birthday, Bella!" Everyone around me at my party called. I smiled even more. I was twelve years old now, I was practically a grown-up already. Edward strolled over to me, holding onto a plastic shopping bag._

"_What's in that?" I questioned. He flashed one of those crooked grins that seemed to always get my attention._

"_Presents from Mum and my stupid brothers." He grinned even more. "D'ya want them now, or later?" _

"_Later." I said. Presents from my 'other' family were special, so I wanted to open them when no one else was around. After the party died down, and it was only me and Edward in the basement, he brought out the bag once more. _

"_This one's from Jazz." He pulled out an untidily wrapped package for me to dig into. Jasper had given me a little wooden carving of a baseball bat, and I had to laugh. I always went to watch Edward's baseball games, and the boys always jokingly said that it was my fault if the team lost because I distracted him. Edward pulled out the next package, which was from Emmett. It was a pretty bracelet that was made out of braided strips of leather and emerald-green beads that reminded me of Edward's eyes. I immediately put it around my wrist._

"_Mum says if you don't like this one, just to 'fess up and tell here, kay?" He handed me the last package in the bag. When I opened it up, I saw a beautiful piece of embroidery that Esme had clearly made just for me, that had pretty butterflies all across it. _

"_No, it's great! I love it!" I said. Edward smiled, like he knew that was what I'd say. When he chucked the bag to the side, I raised an eyebrow. "Where's my present from you?" I teased. He grinned back at me._

"_Well, that depends on how you answer my next question." Now I was really curious. "Bella, you're twelve right?" Confused, I nodded my head. "Well, you're allowed to have a boyfriend now, right?" I nodded again, still not really seeing his point. "So how 'bout I be your boyfriend?" He grinned proudly at me, and I felt my heart flutter again._

"_Yeah, okay!" I said, a blush rising to my cheeks. He brought out a small, clumsily wrapped package about the size of a quarter. I slowly opened it up, and found a pretty braided gold chain._

"_That's your present!" He said. "It was Mum's, but she said that I could give it to you, since you're grown-up now." I smiled happily and fastened the chain around my neck._

**Present Day**

I felt Edward shift on the bed beside me, which pulled me out of my sleepy reminiscing. Yes, for one short year, I had been able to call Edward Cullen my boyfriend. Well, as much as you can be 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' at the age of twelve. When we were thirteen I got in trouble from my dad, Charlie, when he caught us kissing under a blanket in my basement, and that's when Edward had 'broken up' with me, because he didn't want me getting into trouble because of him.

We had still been best friends, and hung around each other all the time, after that. I think back to that year, and I know that we really were way to young to be 'dating'. Not that I didn't want it now, though.

With a small sigh, I grasped Esme's chain around my neck and forced myself to fall asleep next to the person that I wanted the most in this world.

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**A/N: Ah, the angstyness! Fun fact: All of the little 'flashback' scenes are stuff that actually happened between me and my best friend. People ALWAYS tell me that mine and his story is like a freaking movie...**

**Please review! Reviews are loves.  
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	3. Broken Promises

Sleep shook itself off slowly for me. I wasn't sure at first what had woken me up, but as I listened to the birds chirping outside Edward's bedroom window, I realized what it was. My pillow seemed a lot... harder, and lumpier, than I remembered. I could hear Edward's slow and steady heartbeat thumping strongly under my ear. I decided to keep my eyes closed and feign sleep in order to enjoy the feeling of resting against him for a little longer. His deep, even breathing told me that Edward was still asleep.

He shifted in his sleep, rolling so that we were on our sides, facing each other. His one arm was stretched across the mattress below my head, acting as my pillow. I smiled quietly and thought to myself that I could easily wake up like this every day of my life. He shifted again a little bit, and my heart stuttered in my chest when I felt his free hand come to rest against my thigh. _Oh. Dear. Lord._ He pulled on my leg just behind the knee, which placed my thigh over his hip while he buried his face in the turn of my neck. My entire body froze. Believe it or not, in the many years that we had been sharing a bed at night, this had never happened before.

I listened to his breathing, and realized that he was still asleep, completely unaware of what he had done. My brain was exploding into girlish squeals of delight over the situation while my heart thumped rapidly in my chest. His fingers did a slow crawl from my knee up to my indecently lace-covered backside, while I felt him nuzzle my neck. I was three seconds away from hyperventilating. As much fun as I was having, I knew that he was completely unaware of what was going on and I needed to wake him up. I couldn't stand it if he were touching me, but dreaming of someone else.

I did the one guaranteed thing to wake him up instantly. I reached down to his side, and squeezed the pressure point just below his ribs that only I knew how to find. I felt him come awake with a little jolt, and waited for him to realize the fact that we were wrapped around each other like clinging vines. I waited, barely breathing, while I felt his fingers brush across the lace again.

"Since when d'you wear stuff like this?" He asked groggily, obviously _very_ slowly coming to.

"Edward, wake up." I said a little stiffly, when all that my body wanted was to curl into him more. He slowly pulled his face away from my neck, and sleepily blinked at me before turning to look down the bed at our bodies. His hand distractedly ran back down my thigh to my knee in a smooth stroke, and I resisted letting out a small whimper. This was so not fair.

He must have finally gotten the picture, because he cleared his throat and mumbled "Morning" before gently disentangling himself from me and heading out to the bathroom. I took a small minute while he was gone to will the flush out of my cheeks and make my errant heartbeat calm down. Christ, being around that man was going to make me die of a heart attack... but what a reason to go for.

I hurriedly tossed on my jeans, leaving on his t-shirt but tying it up at my hip to shorten it. Little did he know, he was never seeing this sucker again. I quickly ran down the stairs to get started on some pancakes for the boys in the kitchen. As I began mixing batter, Alice sleepily stumbled into the kitchen.

"Want me to make some coffee?" The girl was my saviour, I needed a good dose of caffeine. I nodded my head and told her where she could fine all the stuff for it. I saw her shake her head out of the corner of my eye.

"What?" I questioned. She smiled as she shook her head again.

"You'd think this was your kitchen, since you know where everything is." She laughed a little.

"But it is her kitchen." We both turned to see Jasper leaning against the door frame, watching us with a small smile on his face. "Mum hates cooking, to be honest. She only does it so that we don't die of starvation. Bella's always been the real chef in this house. Remember the night that you and Mum made Spaghetti Pie?" We both laughed at the disgusted look that crossed Alice's face.

"It's actually more appetizing than the name makes it sound." I assured her. I continued to throw together pancakes while Jasper sat at the table, soon to be followed by a groggy Emmett and Rosalie. Not too long after, Esme came in while tying the belt on her house coat and smiling at her family. _I love this_, I thought to myself. And I really did.

Edward was the last of our motley crew to arrive, his copper hair rumpled into a delicious looking mess. He wore a loose-fitting pair of jeans and a sleeveless white under-shirt. I felt another one of those damnable blushes work its way onto my face, and turned my gaze back to my cooking before my head exploded. It had to be some kind of sin for one man to look that good.

We had all finished up our breakfast and were having a quiet conversation around the table when the doorbell rang. Looking at each confusedly, Edward got up to see who the mystery guest at the door was. We weren't expecting anyone, that I knew of. We heard a loud squeal and an "Oh, baby I miiiiiiissed you!" come from the direction of the front door. I wanted to thump my head down against the table in exasperation, but managed to control myself. Emmett didn't even try. He began making gagging sounds that were loud enough to be heard at the front door, judging by the fact that the squealing abruptly stopped. Jasper frowned and shot a look at me.

I got up to find the aspirin for the headache I knew I was about to have.

**Fifteen years old**

_I sat on the floor of the girls' washroom at the high school, and desperately tried not to let the tears fall. Bailey, my best girl friend at the time, sat beside me and threw an arm over my shoulder._

"_It's okay sweetie," She soothed as I felt a tear slide down my cheek. _

"_Bai, I regret it sooo much. I mean, why did I do something that stupid? Why did I give my first time to someone I didn't even like?" She rubbed her hand up and down my arm, letting me get it all out. "I was just so lonely! And he was paying attention to me." I cried even harder._

"_Were you..." She was being hesitant, not sure what would only upset me more. "Were you lonely because Edward hasn't been around lately?" I nodded my head. He had been spending more time with his male friends, and I felt a bit neglected. _

"_And you know what's the worst?" I wiped my tears with the back of my hand, but they just continued to fall. "I had always thought that my first time would be with him. Like, I was actually saving it for him, and then I just had to go and ruin that."_

"_I thought you two were just friends?" She questioned hesitantly. I nodded my head and tried to explain._

"_Me and Edward have been each other's first everything so far. I was his first girlfriend, he was my first boyfriend. We were each other's first kiss, and stuff like that. I guess I had just decided that I wanted him to be my first for everything. I mean, I know that we're just friends and we're not like that, but I had always thought that like, we'd have our first time together. I trust him." I cried all the harder, and she soothed me all the more._

"_You know what I think?" She said. I rubbed my eyes and tilted my head. "I think you're going to marry that boy someday." She placed a kiss on my forehead and hugged me tighter._

**Present Day**

"So anyways, Jessica told me about how she said that, and I was like, that's so totally not fair, right? And then she said..." I began to tune Tanya out. Dear god, how could Edward sit there and listen to her with that amused expression on his face? Did he actually find her rambling somehow _cute_? I could tell from the expression on his face that he wasn't actually listening to her, but he was letting her go on and on nonetheless. I gave up and decided to seek out the boys and Alice instead.

I found them in the basement playing video games. Alice was laughing excitedly, and appeared to be kicking Emmett's ass on whatever game they were playing. Jasper was watching them, but not actually partaking in the excitement.

"Hey Jazz... play a game with me?" I motioned over to their pool table. I needed some of his calming influence right now. He nodded with a small smile and followed me over to the table. As he set up the billiard balls, he shot me a knowing look.

"She's a bit much, isn't she." It was a statement of fact, not an actual question. I nodded my head, and lined up my shot to break and start the game.

"What the hell does he see in her?" I asked. I knew I was being severely disloyal to my best friend right now, but if you couldn't trash about his horrible relationship choices to his brother, who could you? Jasper only shook his head.

"We have no idea. Trust me, you're not the only one that's not a fan." A part of me eased when he said that. At least now I knew that the girl really was unlikeable, and it wasn't just a case of me being a jealous idiot.

"Does _he_ know that?" I looked to Jasper's usually calm face, and saw him grimace a little.

"I think he knows, but wants to pretend not to."

"Why is he dating her then? It's tough to date someone that you know your family hates." Trust me, I had experienced that a few times in my life. I had gone through a string of ultimately worthless boyfriends, ending with the last one being booted out of my life a few months previously. Jasper just shook his head, looking a little sad.

"He was really lonely, Bells. You were away for school, and he was doing his firefighting and trying to take care of us. I think he just needed someone, and she was there."

I sadly shook my head as I lined up my next shot, thinking back to that day in the bathroom with Bailey. Doing something relationship-wise because you were lonely was _not_ the right reason. I had learned that one the hard way.

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**A/N: Weeee! Another chapter done. This one's coming pretty easily for me, 'cause I'm basing a lot of it off of real life stuff.**

**Oh, btw, Spaghetti Pie is an actual meal that me and my best friend's mom made one night. And yeah, it does taste a lot better than the name makes it sound. For reals. If anyone wants the recipe, just PM me and I'll share!  
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	4. Bonding and Bondage

**Thirteen years old**

"_Hey, Bella... want to see something I learned yesterday?" I smiled at Edward while we sat on the grassy hill of the school ground at recess._

"_Sure!" He grinned and reached up to my hair, slowly pulling the bandanna I wore off my head. Confused, I watched him silently._

"_Okay, now put out your hands." I held my arms straight out in front of me, and watched as he knotted the bandanna around my wrists to tie them together. "Now, try and get it undone! And no cheating and using your teeth!"_

_I laughed and tried over and over again to free my hands, but that first time I never could. Edward had to eventually untie it for me. _

**Present day**

I looked down at my cell phone gripped in my hand when it vibrated to say a text message had just arrived.

_ Bells:_

_ When is ur bus arriving?_

I smiled at the message from Edward, eager to see him again. I had spent the last month away for things with school, and I missed him a lot.

_ I'll get in around 8:30 tonite, _

_ have no fear. I know u can't_

_ wait for my sparkling presence._

I grinned silently to myself as I waited for his answer to arrive. I loved playing around with Edward like this. The phone vibrated again, and I eagerly flipped it open.

_ Damn straight. Come right_

_ 2 my place when u get in._

_ I'll get home soon from the gym._

Oh. Sweaty post-gym Edward... It was my lucky day. I could never stop the errant thought from occurring to me that sweaty post-gym Edward was probably very close to what sweaty post-sex Edward would look like. Too bad that's probably the only way I'd ever know. Ah well, fantasies that I keep to myself can't hurt anyone. But, I decided to say what a best friend would say.

_ Just make sure u shower_

_ before I get there. I don't _

_ need 2 smell sweaty man all_

_ night._

I shut my eyes, knowing he would be busy and wouldn't respond to that last message, and let the rocking of the coach bus I was on lull me into a state of mindlessness. I wasn't asleep – I was way too paranoid to sleep in public – but I was content to listen to my iPod and ignore the world around me for a little while longer.

When I got home, I quickly tossed my things onto my bed, and got ready to head to Edward's. I was so excited to see him again that I was practically bouncing off the walls. It was a sad thing indeed when I went too long without an Edward fix. I threw on my long black duster over top of my grey long-sleeved t-shirt and black jeans, and raced out the door.

Once I got to the house, I let myself in and spotted Jasper and Emmett both sitting in the living room at Emmett's computer. Jasper looked up, and almost jumped a foot in his seat.

"Jesus, I thought you were mom when I heard the door open." He said. That explained why the sight of me surprised him so much. Emmett grinned and leaned back in his chair, throwing his feet up on top of the desk.

"Well hey there, stranger." I grinned in response to that. Emmett liked to give me a hard time every time I disappeared for awhile for school. To tease him, I kept insisting that I was really just running away from him. It was a little joke that we had carried on over the years I had been in university.

"Hey yourself." I said back to him with a smile. I pulled off my duster and threw it over the staircase railing. I heard Edward come out from the kitchen at the sound of my voice, and my smile grew even wider. How this kid hadn't figured out my feelings yet was beyond me, because I was sure that they were always written all over my face. His eyes widened a little when he took in the sight of me.

"Wow, hey, you lost weight again, didn't you!" He moved forward and took my hips in his hands, as if to measure how much smaller they were. Growing up, I had always been a bit self-conscious over my weight, but Edward had always been the one encouraging me. My pulse quickened at the feel of him cradling my hips in his big hands, and I had to swallow before I could speak.

"Yeah, I lost another ten pounds!" I said happily. And I was happy. He smiled and gave me a hug that wrapped his muscular arms around my waist.

"You look fantastic." He said quietly, his lips right near my ear. Oh God, I could just die now and be happy. "Let's go up, and we can talk and catch up." I nodded, and followed him up the stairs to his bedroom.

I had always loved Edward's bedroom. In the time that we had known each other, I had helped him and his family move into a new house twice... But Edward's bedroom always had the same feel of welcome and comfort no matter what house it was in. We sat on his bed side by side, and talked about almost everything under the sun. It was about eleven o'clock at night when his cell phone rang. He picked it up, and raised a finger to his lips to signal me to be quiet.

"Hey Baby." He answered. Oh good lord, it was Tanya calling. I sat quietly, turning myself on the bed so that I was facing him instead of beside him. "Yeah, she's here." He must have told her earlier that I was coming back into town. "No, she's downstairs talking to my brothers." I raised an eyebrow at him. He was lying to her about me being there? That was strange. I began to get bored from being quiet and pretending that I didn't exist when I noticed him playing with a length of climbing rope. Getting a wicked idea, I held my arms out in front of me, towards him.

He stared at me for a second, an odd look on his face that I couldn't read, before he smiled and began to wind the rope around my wrists. He tied it tightly and with complicated knots, throwing me a smirk when he was done as if to say _Just try and get out of that one_. I quietly struggled with trying to undo the knots while he continued to talk to Tanya. For the most part, I concentrated on what I was doing, rather than listening in on what he was saying to her. I didn't want to know.

I twisted my hands this way and that, trying to work myself free, but I was having trouble. I lifted my wrists up to my mouth, intending to use my teeth to work the knots loose. He frowned at me, and gently pulled my hands away from my face. _No cheating_, he mouthed at me. I pouted at him, but didn't try to use my teeth again. I eventually worked it loose enough that I could pull the knots free, and slip off the rope. I sent him a triumphant grin, but noticed that he was frowning at whatever Tanya had just said to him.

The rope and my twisting movements had chaffed up the skin around my wrists, and I pointed to them to silently ask Edward for moisturizer. He lifted his shoulders a little, and pointed at the far wall of the bedroom, which was the direction of Emmett's room. I understood his silent message. _Don't know... ask Emmett._

I quietly got off the bed and knocked on Emmett's door. He answered it, apparently in the middle of getting ready for bed.

"Know where any moisturizer is?" He seemed a bit confused about why I was asking for it, so I showed him my chaffed wrists.

"Ouch, Bells. How'd that happen?"

"Edward tied me up." I gasped and clapped a hand over my mouth. I had blurted that out, and I was standing right in front of Edward's bedroom door that was still open a little bit. His bedroom where he was still on the phone with his _girlfriend_. Emmett laughed, knowing about the tying-up game that Edward and I had always played when we were younger, but also understanding just how that would sound to obsessively-jealous Tanya. He pushed Edward's door open further and said "Say it again louder" with a cheeky grin. I shook my head a horrified 'no'. I may not like Tanya, but that doesn't mean that I want to ruin things for Edward... I wanted him to be happy, even if it wasn't with me.

Emmett fished me out some moisturizer from the bathroom, and I grudgingly returned to Edward's room. I really didn't want to sit there and be party to their conversation, but I didn't really have anything else to do. I silently slid back onto the bed, and laid down beside where he was sitting. I rested my forehead against his arm, and he reached his free hand over to stroke my hair out of my face. Ugh, why did I have to love him so much?

I heard him say goodbye to her, and then toss the cell phone onto his dresser beside the bed. He seemed upset, but I wasn't sure why.

"Everything okay?" Not that I really wanted to hear the details of his relationship, but I couldn't stand to see him so down. He heaved a weary sigh, and his beautiful eyes seemed to darken. Uh oh. I watched him silently for a few moments, knowing that he was trying to compose his thoughts.

"She makes me feel... inadequate sometimes." My eyebrows shot up at that one, because Edward was usually one of the most secure people I knew. He sighed again. "It's the little things that get to me... Like she tells me what to wear, and she's always so put together that it makes me feel like it's not okay for me to want to wear track pants and stuff. I just feel like sometimes she's trying to change me, because I'm not good enough for her the way I am." I was shocked. Never in my life had I heard him talk like this. Edward was... Edward. He was confident, composed, and so self-sure. He was always the one to help me deal with my insecurities, and he had always been my ideal of how confident I _wanted_ to be.

"Edward..." I didn't really know what to say, but figured I would give it a try. "Edward, you're perfectly fine the way you are. Really. You're the nicest guy that I've ever come across, and you've always been so sure of yourself. There's nothing wrong with the way you dress. I _love_ the way you dress, because it's part of who you are. Who cares about sweat pants? You work really hard with your job, and there's nothing wrong with wanting to come home and be comfortable. It's not a case of being 'good enough' for her... if she can't love you for who you really are, than she can't really love you at all."

I began to worry that the last part was a bit harsh, but I was still reeling from seeing my friend so confused. He seemed to quietly think it over, and then I saw a small smile work its way onto his face.

"You know, it's a little scary to see my own words thrown back at me." He said. I had to laugh, because he was right. Everything I had just said to him, he had said to me before when helping me through my problems. He shook his head a little. "I like the way that you and I think the same sometimes."

I smiled. "I like it too." He slid down the bed so that he was laying beside me, and I rested my head on his shoulder. I felt his arm come around to clasp me tightly to him, and I closed my eyes to savour the feeling.

"Bells?" I looked up at him as he contemplated me with a serious expression on his face. "Thanks." I smiled at him before closing my eyes again.

-------------------------------

I woke up the next morning in my own bed to the sound of my cell phone vibrating on the nightstand. Alice was calling me from her parents' house, where she had gone to visit for awhile. I ran through the details of my odd time with Edward the night before, and she squealed.

"He tied you up? Kinky." I rolled my eyes, even though she wasn't there to see it. _I wish_, I thought.

Mere milliseconds after I hung up with Alice, the phone vibrated again, but this time with a text message.

_ Guess who didn't go to_

_ work today? Too much snow,_

_ couldn't get through._

Ah, Edward. I loved when he had days off. A thought occurred to me, and I grinned in anticipation.

_ Home free, huh? Want 2 come_

_ over for some breakfast?_

I waited impatiently for his reply, hoping upon hope that he would say yes. It had been so long since Edward and I had shared a breakfast together.

_ Be there in 5 min._

Excellent. When he showed up, he was wearing his favourite pair of grey sweat pants, a white sleeveless undershirt, and a grey zip-up. Mmm... yummy. Edward worked his way around my kitchen and began frying pancakes while I put together some coffee for us, leaving his black, just the way he liked it. _Gotta love a man who can work his way around in a kitchen_.

"You bruised my wrists." I grinned and held my arms out for his inspection. Faint purple marks had appeared overnight, circling my wrists like bracelets. They only hurt a little, and the bruising was mostly due to how much I had struggled and twisted to get at the knots, but I felt like teasing him about it. He gently ran his fingers over the bruises and smilingly shook his head at me.

He wrapped his hands around my wrists so that he was holding them, and the coolness of his skin felt soothing against the bruising. He leaned forward to place his forehead against mine, and laughed quietly.

"I missed you." He said, and I felt my heart melt to nothing within my chest.

* * *

**A/N: I know, I've been delinquent in updating! Between writing papers, studying for exams and finally getting over my pneumonia, life has been insanity itself! But, I get chocolate chips cookies for finishing one of my papers. My friend Heather knows that the way to get me to do things is through bribery. She's such a peach to play along with me.**

**FYI - Me and my best friend actually do have tying-up contests to see who can get out of it first. I saw him two nights ago. My wrists hurt. He's getting too good at knots, the bastard. I'll show him next time.**

**Reviews are loves!!! Love me!!!!  
**


	5. Preserving Memories

**Sixteen years old**

"_C'mon, babes, I got a surprise for ya!" I let Jess tug me away from the wings of the stage, where I had been waiting for my turn to dance with butterflies flapping madly in my stomach. I sent her a look of surprised confusion as we raced down the hall, my costume for my ballet number fluttering softly around my body and my toe shoes impeding my ability to move fast._

_I had ten minutes until I would dance on stage._

"_There's your surprise!" She declared smugly, shoving me forward before I had a chance to see anything. I felt myself impact against what felt like a brick wall. Looking up, I stared into the greenest eyes I'd ever seen. I knew those eyes intimately. I backed up a step, and he dropped his hand from my arm where he had caught it to steady me._

"_Edward?" A smile spread across my face as I took in the wonderful sight of Edward in a full suit and tie. He had come to see me dance. Edward had done this, gotten dressed up, for me. He smiled down at me gently, and brought his other hand out from behind his back. There he held a bouquet of six black roses... my favourite flower in the whole world. No one had ever given me my favourite flower before._

_He leaned forward, and twirled me in front of him, to get a better look at the form-fitting costume I had on. The skirt of my dress flared out around me – like it was supposed to – before softly falling back to my side. _

"_You look beautiful." His quiet words of appreciation meant the world to me. I watched in breathless awe as he slowly leaned forward, and placed his lips against mine. It was the most perfect kiss of my young life. The world around me ceased to exist as I savoured the feeling of his firm lips on my own, and I lost my heart and soul to him in that moment._

_When it was over, he smiled down at me like I had never seen before, and ran his hands up and down my arms while I numbly clutched at the roses. _

"_I'll be watching you." He whispered into my cheek, before disappearing to take his seat. I stared blankly around me, trying to grasp onto the reality that had fled. Jess stood leaned against the wall further down the hallway, grinning to herself._

_--------------------------_

_After Edward left my house that night, after I had received congratulations on my dancing from my parents and everyone under the sun, I took my bouquet of roses up to my bedroom. I hung them upside-down from the ceiling light, and prepared to wait for them to dry out. I wanted to keep these roses forever, in order to have a tangible reminder of the magic that had happened that night. _

_Edward had kissed me. Again. The last time I had gotten a kiss from Edward was when we had dated when we were twelve, four years ago. Did this mean that he wanted me as more than a friend again?_

_When the roses had dried out, I kept them in a vase on my nightstand. I stole one of the now brittle petals, and folded it up into a square, placing it within an old silver locket with my name engraved on it. I would carry around that rose petal with me always, as a reminder of the perfect kiss that I would forever measure every other kiss I received against._

**Present day**

"I have a surprise for you!" I grinned at Edward, excited and feeling alive because I was finally with him again after yet another absence because of school. He looked at me quizzically, but with a hint of that crooked grin that I loved so much playing on his face.

"Now I'm curious..." He teased. As much as I wanted to play up the suspense, I was too excited to wait. I took a deep breath, and grinned at him.

"I got a tattoo!" His eyes widened a little at the news. He smiled even more, and gripped my wrist in his hand, as if to calm me a little through the touch.

"You did? I can't say I'm even really surprised, to be honest. What is it of? Where is it? Did you design it yourself?" I laughed at his enthusiasm, choosing to answer his questions one at a time.

"Well, I _did_ design it myself, because I wanted it to be completely original. And, you know how I like to draw and stuff. As to what and where, I'll just show you!"

I watched his face carefully as I slowly pulled the side of my jeans down to the top of my thigh, and raised my shirt up to my waist. On my right hip, stretching almost indecently low on my abdomen, was _my rose_. I had designed a black rose with a twisted and thorny stem, with a little four leaf clover that attached to it. I was proud of my design, and even more proud of _what_ I had chosen for my first tattoo. I knew he would understand its significance.

"Oh, wow! A black rose! It's beautiful!" He smiled happily at me, but his eyes were still locked on the image stretched across my lower body. "A black rose 'cause it's your favourite flower, right?" I had known that he would get it.

"Yep! And do you know who the first person to give me my favourite flower was?" I teased. I knew he probably wouldn't have known that he was the first. A little frown appeared between his brows as he thought about the question. He finally looked up at my face, looking a little perplexed.

"It wasn't me, was it?" I nodded my head, and saw the surprise flash across his face. "Imagine that!" He looked back down at the tattoo, a look of wonder on his face. He stepped closer to me, his body almost brushing mine. My heart started to beat double-time. He slowly reached out a hand, and stroked the back of one finger down the entire length of the tattoo, making shivers run across my skin. His finger stopped at the spot where my thigh joined my abdomen, and despite my experience with men, I was pretty sure I had never been touched in just that specific spot before.

I couldn't think coherent thoughts anymore. His hand still resting against that intimate place, he looked back up at me. His beautiful eyes had darkened with something I couldn't name, and I gulped. I could feel my pulse fluttering in in my throat, and I stared back at him helplessly. His head began to lean closer to mine, and I stopped breathing altogether. _Oh, please, dear God, let it happen_.

The sound of feet on the stairs broke us apart, and my head instantly cleared. What the hell had just happened? Jasper turned the corner, and smiled happily when he saw me. Normally, I would love to see Jazz, because I had missed him too... but right at that moment I had to resist the urge to curse him to hell. What lousy timing.

---------------------------

At the end of that week, I was leaving once again for schooling. I was really starting to hate my school for how often it took me away from Edward and the rest of the Cullen clan. I missed my little 'adoptive' family whenever I was away.

Charlie, my dad, was going to be driving me up north to where I needed to be and was helping me load up the car with my luggage. I tried not to be moody in front of him, because he was helping me out and hadn't done anything to deserve dealing with a sullen me, but it was hard. I was deeply depressed over leaving... all of the time spent away from the people I cared most about was really taking its toll on me.

Some inner sixth-sense had me straightening up from where I was bent over trying to shove luggage into the trunk. I sensed an Edward approach. As I turned, I caught the way the sun shined lovingly onto him, making his handsome form look like some kind of heavenly apparition. Maybe I was just going crazy because I knew I was about to be leaving him again. I waited quietly while he chatted with Charlie, talking about the trip we were about to take and other man-things that I wasn't particularly interested in. Edward had always been the only guy in my life that Charlie approved of, and it just made him all the more special to me.

When Charlie went back to fetch some snacks to take on the road, Edward and I moved around the side of the building in order to get a little privacy. I wanted to cry, but I swore that I wouldn't. I took one look at his face, and immediately broke that oath.

As silent tears began to course down my cheeks, Edward quietly gathered me into his arms, hugging me tightly to him. Oh God, how was I going to survive without him again? He didn't try to smile at me, or tell me to stop being such a baby. His quiet began to unnerve me a little. I looked up at his face, only to find him staring at me intently.

"I don't want to go." I sounded pitiful. One corner of his lips quirked up in a half-smile, but fell again in no time. "I don't want to leave you again." My voice broke on the last word, and I tried desperately to contain my tears. He used his thumbs to wipe my cheeks dry, and whispered things to me that I was crying too hard to really hear. But his tone got through to me, and I calmed down a little.

"Bells, it's really going to be okay." I shook my head a little, and buried my face against his neck. God, why did this have to be so hard? I felt his hand against my cheek apply pressure, making me lift my head back to where he could see my face again.

"I don't want to leave you." I repeated. I felt as though my heart was breaking, even though I knew he would still be there when I got back.

"I don't want to let you go." My entire body stilled at his whispered words, and the urgent tone behind them. He sounded just as torn apart as I did. I raised my eyes to his face, only to find his own eyes burning with emotion. My heart began to thump crazily in my chest, and I struggled to remember to breathe. I watched as his gaze fell from my eyes to my lips, and dared to hope.

He leaned forward quickly, pressing his lips to mine with a little bit of force because of the emotions swirling within him. My mind went completely blank, except for the fleeting thought that it had been almost five years since I had last felt this kiss. No one had ever kissed me the way Edward did, and I knew instinctively that no one ever would. He drew away slowly, his eyes running over my face as if to check and see if I was about to slap him for the action. I smiled at him gently, all the love in my heart shining in my own eyes, I'm sure. Upon seeing my smile, I watched as a blush crept across his cheeks. _Edward blushes?_ He smiled back at me, and leaned forward once again.

The second kiss was gentler, taking the time to explore where the first had been rushed with passion. Once again, all thoughts spun dizzily out of my head, and I found myself merely soaking up the feelings of it all. The way his hands gripped the back of my shirt tightly, as if afraid I'd get away... the way his breath shuddered from between his lips after the kiss was finally broken.

He leaned his forehead against my own, rubbing the bridge of my nose with his in a caress too tender for me to really put into words. When he finally pulled away, he stared at me steadily for a moment, before turning and walking away. I knew why he left without a word, because I knew him so well.

No words needed to be said, when we both understood the passion and confusion that swirled within both our hearts.

I pressed my fingertips to my swollen lips, trying to hold on to the feeling of the gift he had just unknowingly given me. No matter what happened in the future, I would never regret this beautiful moment.

I slid into the passenger seat of Charlie's car, and waited for him to come out and start the long drive north. Sliding my headphones into my ears, I hit 'play' on my iPod and decided to let it randomly pick a song for me. I laughed when the song that came on was 'Crazy' by KC and JoJo. That had been the first song that Edward and I ever slow-danced to, way back when we were twelve.

I would never be able to escape him, it seemed. And I knew in my heart that I would never want to.

* * *

**A/N: You guys have seriously been just fantastic with your reviews, and I've gotten so many favourite story alerts it does my heart proud. I'm so happy that everyone is loving the story this much!**

**When I was sixteen and did ballet, I had been going through this phase where I was dying my hair black... I look back on the pictures and cringe, for reals. (I'm a natural redhead, and the pale skin and dyed black hair just did not get along)**

**Come on, baby... review me... you know you want to.  
**


	6. Bruises of All Kinds

It was here. Finally here. The end of the school year, and I could stay home with no leaving for four blessed, uninterrupted months. _Thank God._ Cullen family, here I come.

I had tried not to think about the whole 'Edward-kissing-me-when-he-still-technically-had-a-girlfriend' incident while I was away. Tried, but ultimately failed. And, despite my thinking about it, I still hadn't really been able to figure out just what the hell had gone on. Not that I was complaining about the kissing, mind you. Not at all. But the girlfriend... that was a whole other _big_ issue.

Because, as much as I hated Tanya, I didn't want to be the reason she got hurt. And, more importantly, I had too much respect for myself to ever become the 'Other Woman', even if it was with Edward. No, he either would have all of me, or none at all.

Of course, the really big problem with all of this decision-making of mine was that I still didn't have a clue what was going on in that handsome head of his. He must have some kind of feelings for me that were slightly more than 'best friend', if he could kiss me like _that_... but I just didn't know where I stood with him. And the answer to that question mattered oh so very much.

I swore under my breath as the table I was moving slammed into my leg yet again. _Great, bruise number eight hundred._ I looked down at my bare legs in my denim shorts, and mentally rolled my eyes. I looked like I had been beaten with a stick, to say the least. I had one bruise that was larger than my palm spread across the front of my left thigh, with several others dotted around it, and my right leg was covered in multiple bruises from the top of the thigh all the way down to the ankle. This is why I always insisted that moving furniture was bad for your health.

I finally set the table down in its new place, and turned to head for the shower. As I came around the corner, I smacked my right hip – the one with my tattoo, though it had healed fully – right into the top of a wooden chair. Make that both legs and now one hip covered in bruises. _Could I be any more accident prone?_ On the plus side, I was looking forward to a hot shower and falling into bed, as it had gotten quite late, and I had nowhere to be tomorrow.

**Seventeen years old**

_I watched from my seat on the curb of the sidewalk as Edward laughed down at the skinny boy beside him. We had been out for our usual after school activity – Edward skateboarding and me watching on and yelling encouragement for his tricks – when a couple of twelve year old boys with their own skateboards came across us. _

_They had immediately been amazed by Edward's superior skills with the board, which made sense because he had more years of practice than them, and had begun to ask him questions about technique. Usually, I enjoyed listening to Edward talk about how the different tricks were performed when it was just the two of us, but when he got on the subject with other skateboarders I tended to get lost in all the technical jargon. _

_I tuned out the conversation and instead watched how he interacted with the children. It was definitely a sight to see. I let out a little sigh, and couldn't really stop the thought that this was almost like a glimpse into the future. I could easily picture Edward with his head bent toward a little boy's that looked just like him, explaining some manly thing or another to his son. I thought to myself that he would probably wear that same gentle smile, would probably reach out and pat the boy's head the very same way as he had just done to the fellow skateboarder. They finished their conversation, and Edward sped his board over to where I sat waiting for him. _

"_What are you smiling about?" He mused with a smile of his own as he hunkered down in front of me to my level._

"_You're good with kids." I couldn't help it, I grinned more as I replayed the scene in my head. He blushed a little bit, and looked away from me in shyness._

"_Well... I mean... I have Jazz and Em at home, so I guess I'm used to it, right?" I nodded dutifully. Since their father had been gone, Edward had spent a lot of time with his brothers, trying to be a good male role model for them. My smile dimmed a little as I thought about it. He was trying so hard to be like a 'dad' to them, that in some ways he was missing out on his own childhood._

"_Here's what we're gonna do." He said suddenly, breaking me out of my reverie. He gripped my knees with his hands, and squeezed a little. Uh oh. Edward only did that when he was about to nag me into doing something he knew I wouldn't want to. I gave him a dubious look._

"_What are you going to make me do?" I sighed, giving in before he really even had to try and convince me. I never could deny him anyways. All it ever took was one of those heart-melting pleading looks, and I was a goner. _

"_C'mere." He grabbed my hand, pulling me up to trudge along behind him to the middle of the empty parking lot. He slammed his old, worn skateboard to the ground in front of me. He __**couldn't**__ be serious. I looked from the board to him and then back again. _

"_Oh, believe it." He said, as if reading my mind. Oh no. He gripped my waist in both his hands, lifting me and putting me on top of the board before I had the chance to run in the opposite direction. Smiling happily at me, he shifted his hands until they were wrapped around my wrists. "Ready?" I wanted to say 'no', but I figured that wouldn't stop him anyway, so I just settled for giving him a steely glare. He laughed, and then began to walk backwards, pulling me by my wrists so that I was rolling after him on the board._

_He quickened his pace until he was almost running backwards, and I felt like I was flying – as if the only thing holding me to this earth was his unshakable grip on my wrists. Just when I was beginning to enjoy the sensation, one of the front wheels caught an uneven patch of pavement, and I was thrown forward. A quick jolt of panic welled within me, but I was already pitching forward off the board, feeling it slide out from under me. We came down hard, my right knee cracking painfully off the pavement as the rest of me landed on top of him. _

_I slowly raised my head from where it had landed against his shoulder, fearful that he was hurt, while my knee throbbed with pain. He looked a bit winded, but otherwise unharmed. I sighed in relief. He sat up, which effectively made it so that I was sitting in his lap, and rubbed a hand down my back._

"_You alright?" He seemed a little panicked, so I pointed at my knee. My jeans had ripped, and I could clearly see that it was scraped up and bleeding. He chuckled a little, and threw his arms around me to hug me. _

"_What?" I was a little indignant that he was laughing at me, and pouted at him. He laughed all the harder when he saw the pout, but touched his forehead to mine in a familiar way to pacify me. _

"_I was just thinking that you'll probably never be a skater girl." He continued to chuckle as he said it. Some of my disappointment in his conclusion must have shown in my expression, because he immediately brushed a strand of my hair from my face and continued. "You may never be a skater girl, Bells, but you're the best encouragement I've ever had for my skating." _

_And just like that, I felt wonderful. He could always do that to me. I glanced down, and noticed the time on his watch. Oh, crap._

"_Oh no! I have to get home!" I cried. I really didn't want to leave... and really didn't want to get up out of his lap. NO! Bad Bella! Bad thoughts! _

"_Why? What's up?" He gripped my hip when I made a move to rise, holding me in place._

"_Kyle's gonna be at my house in fifteen minutes..." My voice held an apologetic note, though I wasn't sure why. His face immediately darkened, a scowl appearing._

"_Oh. Your 'boyfriend'..." It seemed as though he almost spit the word out, and his face had an expression as though it had left a bad taste in his mouth. My brow furrowed in confusion. He let go of my hip, and helped me to my feet before turning away from me. "Wouldn't want to keep __**him**__ waiting..." The sarcasm in his voice was something I had never really heard from him before._

_I felt guilty. But, the real defining thing was... I felt guilty for leaving Edward to meet with Kyle, not for wanting to spend more time with Edward than my boyfriend. That wasn't right... was it?_

**Present day**

I had only had my eyes open for all of ten minutes before the cell phone vibrated with a text message. I looked at the clock beside my head and saw that it was ten o'clock in the morning. Who would that be?

_What are you up to today?_

Ah, Edward. I was pleased that he was the first contact that I had upon officially coming back home. I hurriedly texted him back, while rolling over onto my back in my bed.

_Nothing that I know of. You?_

I wondered aimlessly if he was asking because he wanted to do something with me. Usually, he didn't ask if there wasn't a reason.

_Thinking about going climbing._

Ah. That wouldn't be including me, then. I enjoyed rock climbing, but I hadn't been able to do it in many years. Edward, however, went climbing almost everyday. He loved the sport, and it was one way that he kept himself in shape in his off-time from the firefighting program. And, boy, did he _ever_ keep in shape. If I could purr, I would.

_Do you mind if I stop by later?_

_I have a picture I want to give_

_to Jazz._

Jasper loved when I sketched, so I usually tried to bring over drawings from time to time for him to keep. It was our special little thing, and I loved it. It only took a couple seconds for Edward's answer to come through.

_Actually, I was wondering if_

_you wanted to come climbing_

_with me?_

I stared at the phone in shock for a minute before my brain could function enough to send a response. He wanted me to climb with him? As if I would pass up the opportunity to spend time with him, doing something that he loved. It was exactly the same as when we were younger and I would go to sit and watch him skateboard. I went not because of the skateboarding, but because I could share with him something that he loved doing in that way. I made my fingers punch in a response before I got too wrapped up in my thoughts.

_Absolutely! I'll be over in ten._

I threw on some soft black yoga pants, and a grey t-shirt that had an electric guitar and the words 'rock and roll' on the front. Okay, not your typical rock climbing gear, but whatever. Maybe today would be a good time to see just what the hell was going on with us. I grabbed the picture for Jasper, and headed out the door.

* * *

**A/N: Ah, finally, and update to satisfy you all. Heather, I know you're waiting with bated breath for this. This chapter was so long that I actually had to split it into two, so the next chapter will go up tonight as well. **

**The bruises on the legs... believe it. I actually have them. And sodding hell, do they ever hurt.  
**


	7. Milk Carton Memories

"Come on, just power it! I know you can reach it, Bells!" Edward was calling up to me from almost thirty feet below where he was belaying for me. My arms were shaking with the effort of almost all my weight resting on just two fingertips. Good god, what made me think that it was a good idea to go rock climbing a day after making my muscles sore with moving furniture? Idiocy is what it was.

A grunt left my lips as I threw my body upwards, and just barely wrapped my hand around the hold. As I did it, I felt the freshly healed gash on my finger from a couple weeks earlier split open anew. Oh no. I looked above me, and realized that I had less than ten feet to go before reaching the end of the climbing problem I was working on. I mentally debated with myself about whether or not I should keep going, despite the heavily bleeding finger, or quit and return to the ground. _Fuck_.

I stretched my hand out to my right, straining for the next hold, and felt a sharp stab of pain from my finger that reverberated up my arm. _Nope, not gonna work_. Sighing in defeat, I turned to look down at Edward.

"Gotta come down!" I shouted to him, and saw him frown a little. Not that I minded the view from up here, to be honest. We had been climbing for hours, and Edward had gotten overheated enough to take off his shirt. _Oh baby_.

"Are you sure you don't want to keep trying? You can reach it, I know you can!" He called up to me, thinking that I was just frustrated. I shook my head at him, and saw him nod his head before moving into the proper position to lower me to the ground. The overhang of the problem I was working on made it so that when he lowered me, I was coming down pretty much on top of him, instead of to his front. When I was about five feet from the ground, the rope released quickly and I slid down right into his arms. _Oh god, sweaty half-naked Edward... and I'm wrapped in those arms_. Why was it that he was the only one that could make me think like a horny teenager all over again?

"What happened?" He was still frowning, looking a little concerned. I turned my hand over, and stared at the disgusting mix of climbing chalk and blood that was caked across my fingers. Ugh. "Oh." He said, before passing me the water bottle that we were sharing. We walked to a different wall, and Edward started to hook himself in to climb up. As I positioned myself to belay him, I realized that I was standing beside a friend of Edward's that I had been introduced to earlier.

He seemed nice, though I couldn't really remember his name, and we chatted about a few different things while Edward climbed. I had to admire the way he climbed. I mean, the man had to be part monkey or something, with the ways that he could twist and turn his body to do these difficult climbs. He made it look so easy, and made the rest of us look like pansies. Both me and Edward's friend were staring up at Edward silently for a minute, before he spoke.

"That route's really difficult." I watched as Edward jumped for a minuscule hold before answering his friend.

"Yeah, he's insane. I tell him that all the time." I smiled as I said it though. As we continued to watch, Edward went for another hard move, but this time his fingers slid off the small hold and his body was thrown backwards. Even though I knew he wouldn't fall, and that the ropes would prevent anything from happening, I couldn't stop the small gasp of worry that escaped my mouth. I saw his friend glance at me in amusement from the corner of my eye before he called out to Edward teasingly.

"Hey, Edward!" Edward glanced down at the two of us questioningly from where he hung above us. "I think I'm scaring your wife!" I blinked. _Wife? Did he just refer to me as Edward's WIFE?!_ Not that I minded, but I was kind of confused. I knew that this guy knew Tanya... _and_ knew that Tanya was dating Edward. So why would he jokingly call _me_ Edward's 'wife'? I looked up at Edward to see what his reaction was. I was startled to see the big grin that split across his face, and he wordlessly turned around to continue his climb. _WHAT?_ Since when doesn't Edward correct stuff like that? When we were younger, whenever someone hinted at any kind of relationship between us, Edward was always the first one to pipe up and say that we were 'just friends'.

I pushed the whole situation to the back of my mind, and just decided to not dwell on it. After we had been climbing for four hours, we decided to call it a day for the climbing. On both of us, our fingertips were shredded, my gash was bloody and full of chalk, and our arms were completely worn out. In other words, a perfect day of rock climbing.

"You did well today, I'm proud of you!" I smiled happily when I heard this. Edward was always great for encouraging me. "I tell you what, let's go get pizza!" Pizza sounded heavenly to me at that point, and I could actually feel my mouth begin to water. "My treat." I blinked. He wanted to buy me lunch?

"You don't have to," I argued. "I have some money, I can pay." He shook his head vehemently.

"No, no. I want to pay. I want to treat you." I wanted to argue it further, but decided to just give in and let him take me out for pizza.

At the pizzeria, we both downed cartons of chocolate milk. Climbing was thirsty work. When Edward finished his, I glanced down at it and was assailed by yet another memory from our many years together. He saw where my gaze was trained, and looked at the milk carton as well.

"Hey, d'you remember...?" Edward smiled at me, and nodded his head.

"Hell yes, I do."

**Eighteen years old**

"_Dude, that's totally impossible to do without ripping the bottom or the sides." I rolled my eyes at the dumb kid. One thing I had learned over the years: NEVER tell Edward something was impossible. That was the fastest way to make him do it, and prove you wrong._

"_I bet you I can do with only opening the top." The challenge was there in Edward's voice, and a steely glint was in his eyes. Oh no. Full-on Edward Challenge Mode. Here we go. The kid agreed, clearly thinking that Edward would never be able to do it. I knew better. The challenge was to turn a milk carton completely inside-out without ripping the sides or the bottom. The only thing Edward could do would be to open the flaps on the top. _

_I sat there at the cafeteria table and watched him patiently work at it for almost fifteen minutes. I never knew how he could work at something so methodically for so long, in complete silence. I would never be able to do it. Eventually, he was done. And there you had it: one completely inside-out milk carton, with no sides or bottom ripped. _

_I made Edward sit and smile for a picture of it, because it was just one more example of Edward proving the supposedly impossible instead quite possible. Really, it was as if he could do anything._

**Present day**

Without another word, Edward began the process that he had last employed almost three years ago. I watched in silence – aside from the occasional giggle – as I yet again witnessed a milk carton be turned inside-out with no ripping. Really, who else aside from us would spend time on something like that? Edward just loved proving people wrong, even if they weren't around to see it anymore, I guess.

He sent me a rakish grin as he finished, and I pulled out my cell phone.

"Sit still for a picture, I can put it with the one from before!" I continued giggle while he dutifully took a picture with the carton for me, and then slid the phone back into my pocket. There were nothing better than times like these, truly there weren't.

While I gazed at him from across the table, I saw a shadow run through his gorgeous eyes. _Ah, this is it then. Time for the serious stuff_. My smile slowly slipped from my face, and I tried to compose my thoughts. A part of me wanted to continue with the lighthearted mood of the day, and not bring up all of the questions that I wanted answered. But I knew I couldn't. I couldn't pretend that nothing had changed between us. Whether he knew it or not, it had the minute he had pressed his lips to mine the last time I had seen him.

"D'you wanna start, or should I?" I asked in all seriousness. I knew he probably didn't want to talk about this anymore than I did. He stared at me steadily, in that unblinking, catlike way of his. I watched as he took a deep breath, and his eyes slid away from mine. Not a good sign.

"Bells, you know I'd never intentionally do something to hurt you... right?" I slowly nodded. It was true. He'd never hurt me... _intentionally_. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. I heard him mutter to himself, some of it sounding like "... not good at this." I stayed silent, and gave him time to arrange his thoughts.

"You are... you... she..." He broke off with a disgusted sigh. I knew that he hated it when he couldn't make his constantly rambling thoughts become coherent sentences. He took another few moments of silence, then tried again. "You are the most important person to me, after my family. _The_ most important. I've told you before that there would never come a time when I'd let myself lose you because of some girl." _But would you let yourself lose me over you?_ The errant thought slipped into my mind, but I tried to ignore it.

"I can't... I don't..." Apparently his incoherency was returning. "I can't tell you a reason why I... did what I did. I... don't think that I really know why. I didn't think about it at all. I just kind of... did it." I figured that I had probably stayed silent long enough. I looked at him steadily, but with a hint of sorrow in my gaze.

"You know you can't do things like that, Edward." He nodded. "It's not fair to anybody... her, me, or you. And... I know that part of it's my fault." He blinked and looked a little confused. "It's partly my fault 'cause... well... it's not like I said 'no' and tried to stopped you. I didn't." His eyes widened, and now I was the one who felt the need to look away. I felt him lightly brush his fingers against the back of my hand, and my attention snapped back to his face. A determined look was there, and I wondered at what it was for.

"If I tell you that I'm going to sort this all out, will you run away?" My brows drew together in a confused frown. At the look on my face, he continued. "Just... don't try to avoid me, okay?" I nodded my head seriously, contemplating what he had said.

We drove back to Edward's house so that he could get changed before heading out to work. As he was upstairs, I went into the living room to visit with Esme. It had been a little while since I had seen her, and I always enjoyed catching up with the gentle matriarch of the Cullen household. We chatted about this and that, before I ventured my real question. I wanted to know what Esme knew about the whole situation between Edward and I, so I thought I'd ask her some questions and see.

"So..." I tried to make my voice sound casual. "How've the boys been getting along with Tanya lately?" I figured starting with talking about Tanya would get me some answers. I watched curiously as Esme's face registered nothing but confusion.

"Why would they have seen her?" Her voice seemed equal parts puzzled and surprised. Now I was the one confused.

"Uh... because she's Edward's leech – I mean... girlfriend?"

"Didn't Edward tell you? They're... what's the term he used?... Oh! 'On a break'. That's it. They're 'on a break' right now. She hasn't been around at all." I was shocked. Since when was he technically broken up with Tanya?

"When did that happen?" I croaked out, my voice not really functioning properly from surprise. She thought about it for a minute before answering.

"Oh, you'd probably just missed it. I think it was the day after you left for school last time."

* * *

**A/N: There you go, the second half of what I wrote tonight. Sorry guys, I just couldn't make my Edward a cheating ass. I'd cry. So, this was my solution, for the moment. **

**And yes, just like the bruises from the last chapter... the gash on my finger is real. And bloody. And probably going to get some kind of weird infection from mixing with climbing chalk. Ah well. **

**Oh yeah. And I really was called his 'wife' by his friend. That was just weird.**

**Reviews are my food. Don't starve me!  
**


	8. Gods and Goddesses

A… 'break'? Edward had broken things off with Tanya the day after I had left. Because he kissed me? I had to admit, my Edward was just honourable enough to do something like that. _No, not 'your' Edward!_

That's right. Not 'my' Edward. He wasn't mine… or, at least, not in the way I wanted him. I mentally heaved a sigh and rolled onto my stomach on my bed. My racing thoughts about the whole situation had kept me up most of the night, and for some insane reason my body had decided to wake me up at ten instead of letting me sleep in.

A loud buzzing snapped me out of my reverie, and I blearily grabbed for my cell phone on the nightstand. _Seriously, who the hell…?_ Edward yet again. Who else?

_What are you up to today?_

I rolled my eyes, even though he wasn't there to see it, and gave my usual answer.

_Nothing that I know of. You?_

I smiled and wondered if he was going to invite me to do something with him. He usually didn't ask what I was up to unless he had something in mind.

_Headed to the mall. Need_

_new clothes. Want to come?_

I grinned to myself. Shopping with Edward? It was always lots of fun. I liked shopping with him better than shopping with girl friends, it was a hell of a lot more interesting.

_Of course. Give me ten minutes._

I sped through my morning routine, tossing on a slightly baggy black sweater that hung off my shoulders and a tight pair of jeans. Comfort was usually key, when it came to my clothes, but that didn't mean that I couldn't help him pick out something fabulous. I raced out of my apartment and over to the Cullen house in no time flat.

---------------------

"No, I seriously think that you need the medium. The large is too baggy around the middle." Edward turned to view himself from the side in the mirror, a doubtful look on his face.

"But the medium seemed too tight up in the arms…" I rolled my eyes. The boy was just not getting it.

"The large is too baggy. The medium fits closer to your frame." _And perfectly shows off those delicious abs. Bad Bella! You are NOT noticing his abs!_ I watched his face in the mirror, crossing my arms behind him. He studied himself for a few more seconds, then bit the corner of his lip in thought. _Oh god, do I want those lips again._

"Alright, alright. You're right." I smirked at him and waited until he turned around to answer.

"As usual." He rolled his eyes and went back into the change room to pull off the black t-shirt I had picked out for him. We had been pretty successful in finding new clothes for him: a few new shirts, a couple of new pairs of jeans, a pair of shorts. All of which had the effect of making him the hottest man to walk the earth. I had seen quite a few girls throw him a second glance while we had been walking around the mall, and I was mildly surprised to see that he didn't even notice the attention he was getting.

When we walked into a new store to find him a new pair of skateboarding shoes, I left him to do his thing (skating shoes were _not_ my area of expertise) and wandered around the women's side of the store a little bit.

That was when I saw it. On the back wall there was a display of a few different styles of summer dresses, all of them rioting in the most vibrant (and in my opinion, ugly) colours of the season. Tucked behind them all, I came across a simple black dress that was floor-length and sleeveless. I fell in love with it at first sight. It was simple, slightly elegant looking but comfortable, and black instead of one of those hideous colours that would make fashion from the 80's jealous.

Seeing as how Edward was still occupied with his shoes, I went back to one of the change rooms to try it on. Low and behold, it even fit me like a dream. The dress was perfect for me, in almost every way. I sighed to myself as I changed back into my own clothes, and exited the change room.

Edward was waiting just outside of it for me, and I wondered how he had even known which one I was in. He glanced at the fabric in my hand and raised an eyebrow.

"This is the most comfortable damn dress I've ever seen." I laughed as I said it, but it was true. "I wonder if I have enough room on my credit card…" I was more speaking to myself than anything, musing about my tight financial situation. I was still trying to get on my feet again after paying my heavy schooling fees for the past year. I bit my lip while I considered whether or not I should try to buy the dress.

"You really like it that much?" Edward asked. I nodded absently, still mulling things over in my head. Edward sighed, but smiled at me. "Alright, go take it to the front." I sent him a confused glance. What was he talking about? He rolled his eyes and starting pushing me towards the cashier's counter. "Happy birthday." He continued drolly. Then I got it. He wanted to buy me the dress for my birthday that was a week away.

"Oh! Edward, you don't…" I trailed off, seeing the sardonic look on his face. It would be useless to tell him not to buy it; he had already made up his mind. Instead, I smiled at him weakly. "…Thanks."

**Eighteen years old**

_I had just finished presenting my scene of the play to my seminar group, and stood nervously while they composed their 'constructive criticisms' like Professor Dunn wanted them to. I sighed in relief as I heard nothing but glowing praise for my performance. Professor Dunn leaned forward on the table, and fixed me with one of her bright smiles. _

"_I have to ask…" She began. "Just where did you get that dress that you're wearing? It's fantastic!" I glanced down at my floor-length velvet skirt, and ran a nervous hand down the boning in my tooled leather corset. I felt my cheeks heat with another of those damnable blushes._

"_Er… I already owned it all. I… don't really like short skirts or dresses." Great, everyone was going to think I was some kind of out-dated freak. To be honest, I had always liked dressing up in old fashioned skirts and gowns… it probably came from my interest in history, which was my major at the university. _

"_Well, you look like one of those elegant movie stars from the old days! It suits you very well." I smiled a little and walked to my seat as the next group set to perform got ready. _

**Present day**

Edward and I trudged up the stairs to his bedroom, carrying the bags from all of his new clothes. I was excited to try on my new dress again, and flew into the bathroom to get changed. I smiled to myself as I pulled the dress over my head, and looked it over appraisingly in the mirror.

I loved it. The skirt of the dress fell straight down to the floor, and because of my shortness, even pooled a little bit around my feet. I walked back into Edward's room, only to find him wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. _Thank you, whoever is responsible for this. _He smiled at me, and I had to make a conscious effort to focus on what he was saying instead of on the way his beautiful eyes sparkled.

"Hey, pretty lady." I smiled a little, and watched as his eyes ran over the sight of me in the dress he had bought for me. I tugged a little self-consciously at the deep V neck of the dress, which was displaying a bit more of my cleavage than I was comfortable with. _Note to self: wear with a tank top underneath to cover up_.

Edward grabbed one of his new pairs of jeans, and the tight black t-shirt that I had talked him into, and started to dress in them. I tried not to stare. I really did. It was impossible not to… the man was built like a Greek god.

We both sat on his bed, and played our favourite game of talking ourselves almost to death. That was one thing that I absolutely loved about Edward: we could talk for hours on end, about absolutely anything and everything.

I had been staring down at my cell phone in my lap, but raised my head to look at him when I realized that he had stopped talking for some reason. When I looked up, my entire body froze at the look on his face. The air around us seemed to still… it was as if some sort of hush had fallen over the whole room. I watched as his eyes darkened to the point of almost being black, before he ran his gaze over my form.

This was something completely out of my Edward experience… he wasn't looking at me as if I was his best friend. Oh no, instead he was looking at me like a woman. I ran a hand nervously across my legs, which were tucked away under the long skirt of the dress. His eyes seemed to follow the movement, before travelling back up to my face. There was no hint of the teasing familiarity that I was used to seeing in his expression. Instead, there was an intensity that both frightened me and made me want him all the more.

He began to shift towards me, crawling ever so slowly forward like some kind of jungle cat stalking his prey. As he approached, some buried instinct made me begin to lean away from him, until I was laid out on the bed and he was hovering above me. I swallowed nervously. _Just what have you gotten yourself into now, girl?_

I watched as his eyes travelled down my prone form, and he reached one hand out to smooth his palm over my hip. My heart shuddered erratically, and it was getting difficult to remember that I needed to breathe.

"You look like some kind of ancient goddess in that dress…" He whispered huskily.

"You… you don't think it's… too long?" I mentally rolled my eyes at my stuttered response. _Way to go, moron_. What could I say? My hormones seemed to be getting in the way of intelligent conversation. He smiled down at me, but it wasn't the usual cheeky Edward smile. This one had a dangerous edge to it… he looked as though he was about to eat me up. _Oh please, please, please eat me up…_

"No, it's not too long." His palm slowly began to travel from my hip to the top of my thigh. "I always liked these kinds of dresses on you… they suit you. They make you look…" His face leaned closer to mine, and I could feel his warm breath whisper against the side of my neck.

"They… make me look…?" It was hard to make myself focus on asking the question. He dipped his face down to the side of my neck, and I felt his lips whisper against the sensitive skin there.

"Beautiful… they make you look beautiful." I closed my eyes, beginning to tremble slightly with the feelings coursing through me. His body still hovered above mine; the only points of contact between us were his hand on my thigh and his lips at my neck.

A shaky breath shuddered out through my lips, and I scrambled for something to say, but obviously my entire brain had shut down. I felt his lips draw away from the curve of my neck, and opened my eyes to see his face just above mine. His eyes watched my lips, and he leaned down closer to me.

"Fuck you, Jazz! You KNOW I won that game!" We both jumped a little with surprise at Emmett's booming voice sounding from just outside Edward's bedroom door. He turned his head to look at the door, then grimaced a little. He slowly got up from the bed, still facing the doorway.

"Fuck…" I heard him sigh, before he opened the door and left the room.

* * *

**A/N: Yay, another chapter for you guys! Thank's so much to my faithful readers! I've been getting tons of favourites and watch notices, but I'd really love to get more reviews! I really would like to know what you guys think! Pretty please?**

**I love my new dress. LOVE IT. Can you tell?  
**


	9. Attack of the Drunks

Finally! The day had finally come. I swept an eye over the room, making sure everything was ready for guests. I was excited to see my friends for my birthday, even if my actual birthday wasn't until the next Tuesday. It was a little easier to hold a party on a Saturday when no one had to work.

I heard a pounding knock on the door and grinned to myself. That could only be Emmett. I had invited the younger Cullen men, even though they were technically underage for the drinking that I knew was going to be going on, because I wanted to see them for my birthday. And it also didn't hurt that they were going to be drinking in my own living room, where myself and their older brother could keep an eye on them.

I opened up the door, and was immediately engulfed in one of Emmett's massive bear hugs. God, I loved those hugs. After Emmett came Jasper, then Justin. Justin was a mutual friend of mine and Edward's and I was glad to finally be able to see him after all my time away. With a little cry, I lept up to wrap my legs around Justin's hips and squeeze him in a hug hello. No one really batted an eye over this, I was just a really expressive person and they all knew it.

While still hanging off Justin, I glanced over his shoulder and spotted Edward grinning at us with a twinkle in those gorgeous eyes. I shifted my eyes to the left of him when I spotted another body there. I took in the look of disdain on Tanya's face while I partially froze in shock. _What the fuck?!_ I put my mouth near Justin's ear and whispered to him in a furious voice.

"What the HELL is she doing here?!" He gave me a squeeze and I dropped my feet back to the ground.

"I'll explain later," He whispered back to me. "But, just know that this isn't Edward's fault at _all_, so don't get pissed at him, okay?" I nodded my head, and took a moment to compose myself. Turning to Edward, I smiled and went in for a hug. My nerves were definitely now stretched tight. How the hell was I supposed to make sure everyone had a good time while _she_ was here? Pretty much no one in the room liked her, I knew that for a fact. Whatever reason she had for inviting herself to _my_ party, it couldn't be worth surrounding yourself with people who hate you. Well, I guess Edward didn't hate her, or he wouldn't have dated her in the first place...

"I'm so sorry..." He whispered to me. I had never been outright about my hatred for the girl in front of him, but he wasn't an idiot. I was sure he had picked up on it at some point. I forced a smile in the effort to still have a good night, despite her very definitely _unwanted_ presence.

"It's okay, really." I lied. _God help me._ I merely nodded at Tanya, and turned to see what the boys were up to. Before I could get too far, the door knocked again. This time it opened to reveal Lisa, her boyfriend Kevin, and James. I welcomed them all in, and the party was off to a start.

**Nineteen years old**

_Edward, Heather and I sat at a booth in the 1950's style diner that we liked to frequent, waiting on our food to arrive. I smiled at the two of them, enjoying myself immensely. I always had a nice time when I went out with Edward and Heather; the three of us never ran out of things to talk about. Somehow, we had worked our way into talking over the subject of children, a topic that personally I could never grow tired of._

"_I mean, I'd like to have kids..." Edward trailed off a little as he thought about what he wanted to say. "But, I dunno. I hope I'll be a good dad." I rolled my eyes, and playfully tapped him across the back of the head. Even just the idea of Edward not being a good dad was ridiculous. _

"_Edward," The laughing exasperation in my voice was evident. "There is no way that you __**wouldn't**__ be a good dad. Look at how many years you've been helping your mom take care of Em and Jazz... you're like a dad to them. You're gonna be fantastic." He blushed at that, and I had to laugh. Heather smiled at the two of us, and I grinned back at her. _

"_What about you?" She asked me curiously. I smiled to myself at the thought of children._

"_I can't wait to have kids..." I said. And it was true. "I think I'll make a pretty good mom, I guess. I want to be one of those moms that the kid can tell everything. But I know that will probably never happen." I laughed at that, knowing that all through my teenage years I had hardly ever told my mother anything. Heather began shaking her head, a smile pulling at the corners of her lips._

"_Darling, you're going to be a great mom. I mean, look at how you deal with me! You're like a mom to me when I need you to be... You always give me good advice, and you're always looking out for me, and I can ask you anything. You always give me an answer, and a true answer. Not just what I want to hear." I felt myself blush at her words, and this time it was Edward chuckling at me. _

**Present day**

"Hello, Darling!" I spun around at the voice, a huge grin already appearing on my face.

"Heather!!!" I squealed as I ran to engulf her in as big of a bear hug as I could manage. Nothing like Emmett's, but I'd have to be about twice my own size if I wanted to do it on that grand of a scale. I hardly let her go to breathe; I had missed her so much while I was away.

It was delightful catching up with her, and a small part of me sighed in relief when I saw that she was just as unimpressed with Tanya as I was. Heather got along with everyone – she was absolutely the nicest girl I had ever met – but Tanya's very loud talk about her sexual escapades was enough to put anyone off.

I watched as Jasper _very _carefully set himself down into a chair, and knew that we were headed into trouble. _Damn, I should have paid more attention to how much he was drinking_. I leaned over to him, and thought that his face looked a little green.

"Are you okay, Jazz?" He oh-so-slowly shook his head, and I knew what I needed to do. "Okay, let's get to the bathroom, big guy." I helped him to his feet, and rushed him as best as I could to the bathroom down the hall. We just made it to the toilet in time.

While I was rubbing his back, Edward came in to check on his brother. He grimaced at the condition that Jasper was in, and sat on the floor beside me to start rubbing his back as well.

"Poor kid..." I muttered.

"Here, I'll look after him... go enjoy the rest of your party." I shot him a doubtful look, but nodded and walked back to the living room. I spent more time chatting up with Heather and the rest of my friends, but in the back of my mind I was still worried about how Jasper was doing. Knowing that my friends knew how to entertain themselves – and not really complaining about having an excuse to get away from Tanya – I headed back towards the bathroom.

Jasper was leaned weakly against the toilet bowl, and Edward was talking to him in that deep rumble of a voice of his. I smiled while watching Edward try to comfort his brother, and shook my head over Jasper. _Well, experience of knowing your alcohol tolerance could only come with age, I guess. _I knelt down on the floor beside Edward.

"I'll take over, Edward... you can go hang out." He opened his mouth like he was going to argue. "I mean it, I don't mind." He stared at me for a second, then nodded.

"You're sure?" I knew that he felt bad, but wanted to go have fun. I smiled even more; I liked the fact that I could almost always know what he was thinking.

"Yeah, I'm sure." When left alone with Jasper, I took over on rubbing his back and running my fingers through his hair to soothe him. We sat on the floor in the bathroom for hours, talking about little bits of nonsense while he tried to rid himself of his nausea. People came in to tell me when they were leaving at the end of the night, and I would leave him temporarily to say goodbye. He kept apologizing to me for 'ruining my party', but I just kept insisting to him that it was okay. It really was, I didn't mind taking care of him at all.

To me, Jasper really was like my own little brother, not just Edward's. It felt good to be taking care of him. At about 2:30 in the morning, we finally got him well enough to stand, and I helped him walk home. Edward, Emmett and Justin had walked some of the girls (including Tanya) back to their houses, so he had left some time beforehand.

When Jasper and I finally got to the Cullen house, we quietly made our way down to the basement where his bedroom was, and I tucked him into bed after cleaning off his hands and his face. We were careful not to make much noise, as Esme was in bed – and, as much as she loved me, I would still be dead meat for letting her not-legal-age son get this drunk.

I crept back up the stairs just in time to see Edward, Emmett and Justin coming in the front door. As Emmett and Justin headed to the kitchen to rustle up some late-night snacks, Edward came straight over to me.

"How is he?" I thought it was kind of cute that his first concern was his little brother. I smiled a little before I answered him.

"I just got him tucked in. Want to go check on him?" He nodded and the two of us headed back down the stairs. Edward sat on the edge of Jasper's bed, leaning over him and whispering to him to ask if he was okay. Jasper was answering him, but we could tell that he was in the process of falling asleep. I knelt on the floor beside the bed, and Edward opened up his legs a little so that I was between them. I leaned over his thigh to get at Jasper, and began running my fingers through his hair to lull him further into sleep.

I felt almost like we were parents watching our child sleep, in that moment. I couldn't really explain it. Edward and I sat there watching him sleep and watching me stroke his hair for some time before Edward spoke in a hushed voice to me.

"You really like to take care of them, don't you?" It was said more as a statement of fact than a real question, but I answered him anyways.

"Of course I do, they're like family to me." He smiled a little, and leaned over me a bit.

"They get the brother-love, huh?" I grinned back at him.

"Of course. Your family's stuck with me."

"Wouldn't have it any other way. What about me?" I was a little confused. What did he mean?

"What, what about you?"

"Do I... get the brother-love?" I frowned.

"No. No you don't." We were silent for a little longer, before he patted me slightly on the shoulder to indicate that he wanted to get up. I stood up, and walked out into the little rec-room that was also in the basement. I spotted Justin and Emmett sitting on the couch in there, watching the TV. As I walked over to them, I spotted Edward climbing up the stairs out of the corner of my eye.

"Well, I'm gonna get going, guys." I said. They both turned to smile at me, a little more inebriated than I had first realized they were. I gave Justin a kiss on the cheek to thank him for coming to my party, and gave Emmett a kiss on the forehead goodnight. When I was half way to the stairs, Emmett's voice brought me to a halt.

"Bella?" I turned to look at him, thinking that he needed me to get him something.

"Yeah?"

"I love you." My heart melted a little, and I smiled fondly at him.

"I love you too, Em." When I got to the top of the stairs, Edward was nowhere in sight. I noticed the light was on in the bathroom by the front door, and that the door was cracked open slightly. _Hmm..._ Pushing the door open, I found Edward with his hands pressed tightly to the counter top, leaning over the sink. I looked at his face in the mirror, and knew immediately that something was off.

"Edward? Are you okay?" He startled slightly at the sound of my voice, then glanced up to look at me through the mirror in front of him.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Don't lie to me, Edward. I know you too well." He sighed, and hung his head again.

"I'm not feeling too well..." Now that I looked more closely at him, I realized that he looked completely worn out, and just a little bit sick. I guess Edward had imbibed in the alcohol a little more than I had thought he did.

"Come on, let's get you up to bed." I held on to his arm, and led him up the stairs to his bedroom on the top floor. He sat on the edge of the bed with his arms resting on his knees, and I stripped his shirt off for him. I was folding the shirt to lay on his desk when I heard him call my name weakly.

"Bells...?" I acted before I really thought about what I was doing, which turned out to be a good thing. I grabbed his garbage pail and held it under his face just in time. It seemed that I was making a habit of taking care of drunk and sick Cullen men that night.

With Edward it was surprising, because he hadn't seemed overly drunk at all, aside from feeling sick. I sat beside him on the bed and rubbed his bare back until he was finished. I place the garbage pail across the room a little ways, and wrapped my arm around his shoulders as well as I could. I leaned my forehead against his upper arm, and waited for him to speak.

"Thanks, Bells." He finally said. I smiled a little, because a simple thank-you from him had the power to do that to me.

"No problem." I laughed. We were quiet a moment longer.

"You're such a good brother." I sighed. It was true; I was constantly amazed at how well he took care of the other two. I felt him shrug his shoulders a little.

"He's my Little One... he always has been." I had to grin at the title for Jasper, seeing as how he was actually taller than both the other boys.

"Ready for bed?" I queried. He sounded completely drained of all energy. He nodded wearily, and I stood up. I helped him unbutton his jeans and slide them off, until he was only in his boxers. Swinging his legs up and onto the bed, I pulled the covers up over him. I felt him slide his hand over mine to grasp it tightly, and I gave him a kiss goodnight on the forehead, much as I had done to Emmett.

He stared at me a moment, and I wondered what was going through his mind just then. I slid my hand out from under his, and contemplated the mess I was most likely going home to. The sound of his voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Bells... I love you." I smiled at him after a moment, but inside I felt as though my heart was breaking. He didn't love me the way that I wished he did... and God, that got more and more painful as time went on. I didn't know how much more of it I could take, before I withered away into nothing.

"I love you too." I replied, at that moment willing him to perceive it any way that he wanted to. I watched as sleep took him over, and stole a quiet moment for myself to look upon his sleeping face. Though the word 'beauty' was not usually applied to men, I could think of nothing more perfect to describe him right then.

I glanced at the clock on his nightstand, reading that it was four o'clock in the morning. I turned to go to the door, to go home and clean a little before falling into my own bed. I stopped mid-step and glanced back at Edward again. _Fuck it._

I quietly shed my clothing, and grabbed his t-shirt from where I had left it folded on the desk. Slipping over him so that I was on the side of the bed closest to the wall, I slid under the covers and closed my eyes. I felt Edward snake an arm around my waist in his sleep, and heard him mumble my name.

_My_ name. Life was good.

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**A/N: This entire chapter is dedicated to my wonderful Heather, who faithfully reads this story all the time and listens to me bitch about the parts that come from real life. I seriously don't know what I would do without her. **

**And, to be honest, you guys can thank her for the fact that I'm actually updating this on a regular basis... if I didn't have her demanding chapters out of me all the time, I'd be waaaaay too lazy to write them! :P**

**I'd love some more reviews, guys. Please keep them coming! You can all nag me into writing like Heather!  
**


	10. Clean, or Dirty?

**Disclaimer: This chapter contains adult content of a sexual nature. If you are under-aged, or prudish, you've been warned.**

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I fluttered slowly into consciousness, gradually becoming aware that I was in my favourite place… Edward's bed. I kept my eyes closed, recalling all of the events from the night before: Jasper's unsuccessful run-in with alcohol, Tanya's guest appearance at my party, and tucking a drunk and sick Edward into bed before climbing in myself.

I smiled a little as I remembered how absolutely _adorable_ Edward had been with Jazz last night, and slowly opened my eyes to get a look at his face. My heart thumped with shock when I found myself staring directly into the devastating green of his eyes.

_Well, hadn't been expecting that_.

"Good morning, old lady." He grinned and dodged the pinch that I aimed for his side.

"I'm twenty-one… hardly ancient." I watched as he clamped the tip of his tongue in between his teeth to make a show of restraining himself, and felt my ability to think go right out the freaking window. _Oh god… his tongue_.

He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead before getting up out of the bed. I couldn't keep my eyes from skimming down his muscled back to watch that cute butt as he walked toward the bathroom to get ready for the day. _Congratulations, Bella. You're twenty-one and still have the hormones of a seventeen year old._

I lounged in his bed while I waited for him to come back into the room, content to never leave it again. When he dressed, I noticed that he grabbed the sleeveless shirt and pair of track pants that he usually reserved for wearing under his fire gear.

"You've got work today?" I questioned, admitting to myself that I was a bit disappointed. He nodded absently while he packed his duffel full of different bits of equipment that were scattered about the room. When he was finished, he came to sit on the edge of the bed, leaning over where I was still laid out.

"Do me a favour?" He asked. I had to restrain myself from rolling my eyes at him. As if I would ever say 'no' to him.

"Sure. What's up?" He flashed that crooked grin at me that I loved so much, and I was instantly a goner.

"Hang around today? I mean, I know that you probably need to go home and clean, but could you be here when I get home? I'll be back around eight…" He seemed almost nervous, which made me raise a brow.

"Yeah, of course." I said simply. He smiled and picked my hand up from where I had rested it on his thigh, and placed a soft kiss to the inside of my wrist. He was just going out the bedroom door when my brain kicked in again.

"Edward?" He glanced at me from over his shoulder, raising one of those perfect brows in question. "Be safe." He smiled at me reassuringly, before walking out of my sight.

**Sixteen years old**

"_Dream on, pansy-boy. I can take anything you can dish out." I stuck my tongue out at Edward, but still backed up a couple steps when he began walking toward me with intent. There wasn't much room open in the basement of my house, but we were having the wrestling match of all wrestling matches regardless. _

_He smiled a wolfish smile, and lunged at me. I moved just in the nick of time, narrowly avoiding him grabbing hold of my arm. I backed up a couple steps further, keeping his prowling body well in my sight. He lunged again, and this time caught both of my hands. _

_We stood facing each other, hands locked and fingers entwined, pushing to try and knock each other over from this position. I couldn't push him back – I didn't really have the strength – and he couldn't push me over because of the way I had my knees bent._

"_Give it up," I taunted him. "You're not gonna win this one." He grinned darkly at me again, and I could see some kind of evil glee in his eyes. Uh oh. Edward seemed to have a plan._

"_How much do you wanna bet, girly?" My eyes narrowed. Did he just call me 'girly'? I growled at him, intending to make some biting retort. Just then, Edward let go of his grip on my hands and dropped to his knees in front of me. _

_Before I could react, he threw his arms around my legs, hooking me behind the knees. He jerked my legs forward, pulling them out from under me and sending my body crashing downward. I cried out as I felt my head smash off the small square of concrete that wasn't covered by the rug on the floor. _

_The next thing I knew, Edward was hovering above me, a look of panic suffusing his face. _

"_Oh my god… Bella, I'm so sorry! Are you okay? Are you hurt? Do you have a concussion? Oh my god… I should take you to the hospital!" I groaned and raised a hand to the back of my head, feeling to see if it was bleeding. Thankfully, it wasn't. I pushed on Edward's shoulder to make him back up so that I could raise myself._

"_Relax, Edward." As much pain as I was in, I had to giggle a little at how worried and flustered he was… it was kind of cute. "I'm okay. I don't need a hospital, and yes, I know you didn't mean to do it. It's my typical luck that my head would hit the one open spot of concrete in the whole entire basement, isn't it?" My voice held a note of wry humour that had him reluctantly grinning._

"_Yeah, just your luck." He rubbed my back for a minute before helping me to my feet._

**Present day**

"You ain't got nothin' on me, little man!" Jazz frowned and then lunged at me, but I side-stepped him expertly. The boys were kind enough not to point out that if anyone was 'little' in our group, it was definitely _me_… I was maybe only _half_ the size of any of them.

I glanced around the backyard to see Edward and Emmett wrestling just a few feet away. During the day, while Edward had been at work, we had gotten a small rain shower which had made their backyard perfect for some muddy rough-housing fun. I narrowly avoided Jasper again, but my momentum threw me right into the middle of the other two boys. _Oh, shit._

I got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as I watched Edward and Emmett grin evilly at each other, right before Emmett launched himself at Jasper and Edward began to slowly stalk his way toward me. We tackled each other with gusto, Edward gripping me around my waist while I swiped a foot behind his to try and trip him.

Being the size that he was, and me being the pathetic size that _I_ was, it wasn't long before he gained the upper-hand. I felt myself falling backwards, Edward's body closely following mine, before landing hard on the muddy ground. The weight of him slammed into me, though not as badly as I had been expecting. He had caught most of his own weight on one of his arms, and his left hand was wedged between the back of my head and the ground, to keep me from really being hurt. One thing that could definitely be said about Edward: it only took one time for him to learn a lesson.

We grinned at each other before he eased back to give me a hand up. I glanced over at the other two boys to see Emmett gleefully sitting on Jasper's back, his weight alone was enough to hold the slimmer boy down.

After the four of us calling a truce, we went inside to help ourselves to Esme's delicious dinner. She shook her head a little at the grubby state that we were all in, but only smiled lovingly at us. Esme had told me one time before that she enjoyed how well I could fit in with the boys, that she was so used to them that she wouldn't know how to handle a girl that was _too_ girly.

"You all realize that we only have the one shower, don't you?" She teased us. I smiled back at her, not bothered much by how muddy I was at the moment. Emmett elbowed Jasper and kicked at Edward under the table to make me laugh.

"I get it first!" He boomed. "The biggest should get it first."

"I'm taller than you!" Jasper returned, frowning at him.

"But I'm still _bigger_, skinny boy." Edward shook his head at the two of them, getting up to go put the cover on the barbeque outside when the rain began to fall again. Esme threw a frowning glance at the two younger boys.

"You should let Bella have it first, you know. _Ladies first_, right?" They both rolled their eyes, but gave in.

"Since when has Bella ever been a _lady_?" Emmett joked. I kicked him under the table and stuck my tongue out at him before going to dig up some bath towels for all of us.

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"Hey, Em, I need…" I had just lifted my foot to step into the shower when the bathroom door had opened and Edward had stepped in. Clearly, the door lock wasn't working properly again. I gasped and lunged for my towel, holding it in front of me. _Not that it matters now, he just got a full show…_

Edward had stopped just inside the doorway in shock, his eyes wide and his mouth fallen open. I remembered vaguely that Edward had been outside dealing with the barbeque when Esme had made her 'ladies first' decree… hence why he thought he was walking in on his brother and not me. We stared at each other silently, neither knowing what to say.

The sound of the door falling shut behind him seemed to snap him out of whatever thoughts he'd been having. A dark look entered his eyes, and I watched in stunned fascination as he gripped the bottom of his muddy t-shirt and pulled it over his head. I gulped loudly, and my legs felt like they wanted to turn into jelly right at that moment.

My hands clutched the top of the bath towel even harder when he popped open the button on his jeans; I couldn't stop my eyes from following the movement. I could feel butterflies flapping around madly in my stomach as his jeans hit the floor, soon to be followed by the rest of his clothing. _Well Bella, Edward's naked… say goodbye to your sanity._

He slowly prowled towards me, and I backed up a few nervous steps. I desperately tried to get my brain to stop steaming enough to remember how to breathe.

"What…" Words failed me as he came so close that his body was almost brushing mine. I tried again. "What are you… doing?" The last word came out as more of a squeak. Edward slowly reached forward, gripping my towel in one hand. He stared down at me for a moment, before giving a hard jerk and making the towel tumble to the floor. _Oh. My. God._

I backed up another step, which brought me up against the wall of the shower. Edward followed me in, his eyes drifting down my quivering form before resting again on my face. His hands thumped against the wall on either side of my head, hemming me in. I licked my suddenly dry lips and saw his eyes follow the movement.

"This is… a little outside of the realm of… best friends… wouldn't you think?" I asked breathlessly. _What are you saying, idiot!? Shut up! This is what you want!_ I watched as he slowly nodded. Edward dipped his head down slightly, pressing his lips to mine a little roughly. My thoughts seemed to run parallel to this morning: _Oh my god… that tongue. _

He broke off the kiss and raised his head again. His eyes burned hotly down into mine, and it was as if the gentle best friend I had known all these years had temporarily disappeared.

"Yeah, this is outside the realm of best friends…" He ground out roughly. "Do you care?" I stared at him for a moment. There was no debate in my head about this, none at all.

"Fuck, no." I gasped, before pouncing on him. He shifted his hands from beside my head to grip me under my thighs, lifting me up and turning to press my back against the adjacent wall.

The spray from the shower fell onto his broad shoulders, misting the both of us with water. Our bodies were so hot that the droplets felt cool on my skin, the sensation barely registering in my mind as Edward began to passionately fulfill every naughty fantasy my mind had ever conceived about him… as well as a few that it hadn't.

As I revelled in the sensation of him against me, the things that he was doing to me, one thought caught in my head: _My Edward. Mine._

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_**A/N: Alright, I hope that a little Edward-Bella sexiness makes up for the fact that you guys had to wait a little while for this one. Yay, they're finally getting somewhere!!! I'm just as excited about it as you guys are... which, I know, is ridiculous considering I'm the one that controls what they do or don't... do.**

**I expect many reviews for this. If not, Bella and Edward will never have sex AGAIN!!! Muahahaha!**

**Okay... no, I wouldn't do that. But review anyways, 'cause you love me. *puppy eyes***

**So... me and him having a discussion about various ways to have some naughty fun-time in the shower last night led to this... Originally, I was gonna put them in the bed, but then thought "What the hell?"  
**


	11. Cattyness and Crosswords

"You did WHAT!?" I squeezed the pillow I was holding tighter to my chest at Alice's delighted squeal. She was grinning from ear to ear, and I knew that I was up for a long discussion. She was going to want _all _the details. "And in the _shower_? God, that's so hot!"

I felt my face flush brightly, and ducked my head as a slow grin worked it's way to my lips. _You have NO idea just how hot it really was_. Burying my face in the pillow, I allowed myself a triumphant laugh. Finally, I felt like I had everything that I could ever possibly want.

"So, you guys are dating now, right? Jazz is going to be so stoked." The smile slowly slipped away from my face. _Were we dating now?_ Alice must have seen the look, because she began to frown. "You're not going to do the whole 'friends with benefits' thing, right? You're better than that, Bella." I slowly shook my head.

"No, I wouldn't do a 'friends with benefits'... It would kill me. I guess we need to have a talk, huh?" I sighed, knowing that I _really_ didn't want to have that conversation, but also that it was necessary. Alice jumped up from my bed where we had been sitting, and tugged on my arm.

"Come on," she squealed, trying to lighten the mood back up again. "This calls for celebrating of epic proportions!" I started to shake my head, knowing where she was going with this. "Oh yeah, baby. We're going, so don't even try to talk me out of it."

And that was how I found myself at the bar.

**Nineteen years old**

"_I can't even believe that he got another girl pregnant... while we were still dating!!" I watched worriedly as Alice finished off her cocktail, and immediately raised her hand to call the bartender over. She wasn't anywhere near drunk, but I thought I should probably keep an eye on her. "What an asshole!!! Never let me talk to Mike again!" _

_I nodded. Mike was an asshole, and it made me sad because I used to think that he was an awesome guy. I looked up in surprise as a shot of whisky was plunked down on the bar in front of me. _

"_So, here's how we're going to make Alice feel better tonight." Alice raised a brow at me as she said this, as if daring me to contradict her. I swallowed nervously, knowing instinctively that this was not going to turn out well for me. "I want one thing. I want to see you get drunk." I raised an eyebrow at her. "Come on, Bella! I've never seen you drunk! You can drink like a tank, it's not fair." I sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to allow me to get out of this. _

_Two hours, ten shots of whisky, four shots of tequila, and two beers later, a sober Alice was tucking a very drunk me into my bed. _

"_The things I do for you..." I mumbled as she laughed and headed for her own room._

**Present day**

"You _can't_ be serious!" I nodded my head enthusiastically, once again grinning like mad. "He pushed you up against the wall? Oh my..." We both burst into laughter as Alice pretended to fan her face.

"Oh my God, don't tell me that Bella _actually_ got laid?" I immediately frowned at the voice coming from behind me. There was only one bitch on the planet that could whine like that. "What sucker was desperate enough to resort to _that_?" I slowly turned around, a cocky smirk on my face. _The sucker that YOU want right now, bitch._ She seemed a little confused that I was smirking instead of frowning at her. Good, let her wonder.

"Hey, Mac..." I called over to the bartender, who was actually a friend of mine. "I didn't know you let under-age kids in here now." The big man behind the bar scowled at turned to look at Tanya and her gaggle of air-headed brats. I sat back with Alice and watched the entertainment happen.

"ID's." Mac gruffly demanded. The girls all pulled out cards a little nervously, and he looked them over with a frown on his face. His frown deepened upon looking at the cards, and he glared at Tanya while he snapped every one of the fakes in half. "Out!" He barked at them. The girls went skittering out the door while glaring me down for giving them away. Mac turned to look at me.

"Thanks, kiddo. I'd've been in shit if anyone found out under-ages were in here. Remind me to fire the door guy." Alice and I burst into laughter over our petty little revenge on Tanya. Sure, it had been bitchy, but damn it had felt good.

"Speaking of the Bitch-Extraordinaire," Alice began while nibbling on a cherry from her cocktail. "Why the hell was she at your birthday party?" I rolled my eyes, remembering the explanation that Emmett had eventually afforded me.

"She thinks that she still has a shot with Edward, so she's trying to put herself around him every chance she gets. She weaseled her way over with them by threatening to out the fact that Em and Jazz were going to be drinking to Esme." I shook my head while Alice snorted in disbelief.

"What a child." She muttered. I had to agree... I was getting really sick of Tanya's childish antics. "So, where are you heading after here? I have a date with Jazz..." I watched as pink slowly crawled across Alice's cheeks. _Since when does Alice blush?_ I contemplated the question for a second.

"Probably over to Edward's..." I sighed. "I should really talk to him about this whole thing. I mean, I really need to know what the hell we 'are', you know?" Alice nodded, and offered me a small smile of reassurance.

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I groaned as I slowly lowered my legs from around his hips back to the floor. The ridges of the bedroom door were digging into my back, but I couldn't work up the energy to care. Mind-blowing orgasms tended to do that to you.

"Okay..." I began, my voice still a little breathy. "When I said I wanted to talk... this wasn't quite what I had in mind..." He laughed a little shakily, and began nibbling down the side of my neck. I felt him grip my thighs to lift them back up around his hips, and he began walking us over to his bed. By the time we got there, my clothes and his had somehow magically found their way to the floor, and I was trapped underneath him while he tried to catch his breath from our door-aerobics.

When I had first shown up at Edward's place, walking in the front door like always, I hadn't been sure what to expect. We hadn't really seen each other after the whole naked-shower-sex thing, and I guess that a part of me had been worried over how he was going to act. Never would've I expected to have been pounced on the minute he set eyes on me. _Good thing I wore a skirt today_. I ran a hand down his bare back, unconsciously soothing him while his fingers flutteringly traced over the lines of the tattoo on my hip. I felt him place a kiss on my collarbone before he raised his head to look at me.

"What did you want to talk about?" Staring into his emerald eyes, I could see a shadow of trepidation. Apparently he was just as worried about all of this as I was. Swallowing nervously, I ran my fingers through his hair before I began.

"What... what is this?" My voice was soft with nerves. His eyes slid away from mine for a moment, and my heart began to beat even faster. When he looked back at me, the tender look in his eyes calmed me a little.

"I don't really know..." He breathed. He ran a thumb across my cheekbone while he seemed to give the problem serious contemplation. "You're... everything. You're my best friend, but you're more than that. 'Girlfriend' doesn't do the amount of years we've spent together justice, it doesn't... fit." I understood what he meant. The title 'girlfriend' or 'boyfriend' just wasn't enough to show what we were to each other. He frowned slightly in thought. "You're my... lover?" The word sounded oddly poetical and old-fashioned, coming from Edward, but he was right.

The term 'lover' held much more meaning. I smiled slowly at him, and watched the nervousness leave his face. I decided to tease him a little, just to see how he would react.

"Am I you're only lover?" I had a cheeky grin on my face, so he knew that I meant it as a joke, but he frowned as if insulted all the same.

"Of course you are!" He declared hotly. I felt my heart once again melt at his insistence. _Edward, you've ruined me for other men for the rest of my life. You'd better stick around._ I would never be happy with anyone else, of this I was sure. I rewarded him for his declaration with a long and passionate kiss, before pushing him away from me.

He looked a little confused when I left the bed and grabbed his t-shirt, throwing it and my panties on. Grinning happily, I threw a pair of cargo shorts at him and left the room for downstairs, knowing that he'd follow me out of curiosity of what I was up to.

**Fifteen years old**

_My job interview had ended earlier than I had expected. So, what was there to do at nine o'clock in the morning on a summer day? I didn't feel like going home yet. I wandered a little aimlessly, and found myself on Edward's street. A part of me wondered if he was awake yet. _

_When I reached his house, I stared up at his bedroom window on the top floor for a minute. The window was closed, which meant he was probably still asleep. Getting a brilliant idea, I reached down to the ground and picked up a pebble. It pinged slightly as it bounced off the window's glass, but there was no movement from inside. I grabbed a couple more, and thew them one after another at the window until I saw the glass begin to open._

"_What the hell...?" Edward rubbed his eyes sleepily before focusing on me standing just below his window. A small smirk crossed his face. "Isn't it the guy that normally throws pebbles at the window?" He mused. I grinned at that. _

"_Who says that we're normal?" He laughed and shook his head. _

"_What do you want?" He continued to grin while he said it, so I knew that he wasn't angry. _

"_I'm hungry." I pouted a little while I said it, knowing that the pout usually got results. I watched as he sighed, and knew I'd won._

"_Alright, but you're cooking." As I walked in the front door, I saw Emmett and Jasper coming out of their bedrooms, looking as though they had both also just woken up. Edward walked downstairs in nothing but a pair of loose pyjama pants, and hugged me from behind while I cooked some scrambled eggs. He kissed me on the back of my head before helping his younger brothers wash up for breakfast. _

_I smiled as I cooked, thinking about how nice it was._

**Present day**

"Oolong..." Edward stretched out the word, as if testing its unfamiliarity. He glared down at the crossword we were working on, the majority of the boxes having already been filled.

"Tea." I said absently. Edward pulled me tighter against his chest, so that he could tilt my head back and see my face. We were sitting on the living room couch, myself in-between Edward's stretched out legs and my back cradled to his chest. The newspaper's crossword was sitting on top of my lap, and Edward's arms were around me to write on it.

After following me downstairs, Edward had raised a brow when I'd picked up the crossword and patted the couch, indicating for him to sit with me. We'd settled together comfortably, and had almost completed the whole thing together.

"What?" He asked, a note of surprise in his voice. I rolled my eyes at him, and jabbed him a little in the ribs with my elbow.

"Oolong is a type of tea. See, look at the boxes: there's three of them. The answer is 'tea'." He kept looking at me with surprise, and I elbowed him again, but this time hard enough to make him grimace. "I _do_ know some things, smart ass." I grumbled, but inside I was laughing over the fact that I could still surprise him after all these years.

As Edward wrote in my answer, we heard the front door bang open noisily. _Emmett's home_, I thought. I grinned when I saw Em's face peer around the doorway to the living room, before he fully walked in. He seemed to stare at us for a few minutes, a serious expression on his face. It cleared after a moment, and he grinned at Edward.

"About time you came to your senses, bro. Just don't kill me when I kiss her from now on." With that, he sauntered out the door and into the kitchen. Edward and I traded a surprised glance, before we both laughed.

"I guess Emmett doesn't mind..." He mused, before turning to look back at the crossword.

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**A/N: Alright, sorry that you guys had to wait for this one. Work hasn't given me a lot of writing time lately, but I managed to get this much out today. Hope it satisfies for the mean time!**

**As per usual, Heather's been championing you guys and bugging me to keep writing. She's so fantastic! Please keep leaving reviews, we love going through them and seeing what you guys have to say, or having a good laugh together over the funnier ones. You guys and your comments honestly make our day!**

**So... the pebbles. Yes, it totally happened exactly like. He wasn't too happy when I joked and called him 'Juliet'... Gee, I wonder why? *evil grin*  
**


	12. Fire Boy to the Rescue

**A/N: Any hardcore Jacob fans may not want to read this chapter. He's portrayed as quite the bad boy, and not in a good way. You've been warned. **

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**Nineteen years old**

"_What the hell!?" I stared at him in disbelief, momentarily unable to comprehend the entire situation. Jacob put on his 'I was an idiot, give me another chance' face, and tried to work his way back into my good graces._

"_I'm sorry, Bella... I don't know what I was thinking." I had heard this line from him far too many times before, it had lost it's effect on me. _

"_Obviously you were thinking with your dick instead of your brain." I spit out venomously. I had given him more 'second chances' than he'd ever really been worth. I watched as a muscle twitched in his jaw when he clenched his teeth, and I could tell that he was trying to restrain his anger. Not that he had any RIGHT to be angry. "Get out of my house." He gripped my upper arm, his fingers digging painfully into my flesh as he towered over me. _

"_Come on, Bella. Let's talk about this..." I stared at him disdainfully. Was he serious? HELL NO. I was through 'talking' with him, since everything that came out of his mouth was a lie. _

"_No, I don't think so. You've said enough. Pack your shit and go live with your tramp instead." He thrust his face angrily close to mine, trying to crowd me and frighten me. I stood my ground._

"_Don't you fucking call her that!" He yelled into my face. My precarious hold on my temper snapped, and I swung my fist before really thinking it through. It connected with the side of his face, snapping his head away from mine. He stared at me with a stunned look on his face, and in that moment I hit him again. _

"_GET OUT!" I screamed. For a moment, it seemed as though he was going to hit me back... but then he turned and grabbed hold of the closet door, ripping it completely from the wall and throwing it to the floor in a fit of fury. Alice rushed into the room at the crash, and began pulling me out of my bedroom and toward hers. _

"_Bella, you're going to go sit in my room. Jacob, we're going to pack you a bag, and you're going to go stay at Quil's for the night. Tomorrow you can come and get the rest of your things." He nodded curtly at her, and I left to sit wearily on her bed. Never had I imagined that Jacob could have this kind of cruel streak in him... We'd dated for almost a year, and yes there'd been problems almost from the start, but most of the time he'd been like a dependent puppy._

_After a few minutes, I decided that I needed a drink of water... just some small task to do to get my mind off things. I started down the stairs as he was coming up them. _

"_Get out of my way, bitch." He pushed me hard to the side, my ribs connecting painfully with the banister while he moved back upstairs. I stayed in the kitchen until I heard him leave, then I slowly climbed back up to my room._

_By the next morning, I had everything of his stacked by the front door, ready to be taken away. I didn't go downstairs the entire day, until Alice told me that he was gone. Edward had been so right about him._

**Present day**

I stared at the words, ridiculously happy considering it was something so seemingly trivial. _Bella Swan is in a relationship with Edward Cullen_. Ah, Facebook. Gossip central in the computer age. You had to love it and hate it at the same time. I scanned down my Wall, reading the various comments of _Oh my God_ and _How'd this happen?_ and _It's about time, you two_. I was grinning like an idiot. I couldn't help it.

I wondered vaguely if Edward's male friends made comments like this to him. Probably not. They'd probably just shrug it off with an _Oh, that's cool_ and then continue on with their day. Guys could be so blissfully uncomplicated sometimes. I shut down the computer and prepared to head out the door. I was meeting Lisa and Heather for some coffee across town, and I didn't want to be late.

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"Yeah, it really does suck when you're away for school, Bells. But, at least we get some time with you whenever you're home!" I nodded my head, smiling at Lisa. I always missed my at-home friends whenever I was away for schooling.

"You're going to the local college, right?" I questioned. She nodded her head while taking a careful sip from her tea. "Edward went there for his firefighting program." I mused. She grinned at the mention of him.

"Yeah, I ran into him a couple times at the school. One time was a little... scary." She laughed lightly, but she'd peaked my interest.

"What do you mean?" Her lips twisted in a wry grin before she began her tale.

"You remember when you were dating that douche-bag Jacob guy?" I nodded my head. Many times during the almost-year that I'd dated Jacob – until just before my twentieth birthday – I'd gone to Edward for relationship advice. He'd always calmly listened to my woes, and given me the logical advice that I'd needed to hear. I don't know what I would have done without him that year.

"Yeah, I used to bitch about him to Edward all the time, poor bastard." She smiled a little, and then continued on with her tale.

"Well, I ran into him outside of the school gym one time. I swear, I barely got out a 'Hi Edward' before he was off on a rant about that Jacob guy. He was mad! I mean, like really _really_ mad! He looked like he could have killed the guy on the spot if he'd been in front of him." Both my eyebrows shot up in surprise, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a similar expression on Heather's face.

I was shocked. Whenever I'd gone to him, Edward had always been calm, cool and collected as I'd related Jacob's infidelities, clingy tendencies and controlling behaviour. He'd never once shown anger over the situation in front of me. _No, that's not true, _my brain objected. There had been one time when I'd seen a small hint of anger in his face. I'd come home on a visit from school, and a large bruise had decorated my arm. Edward had asked me how I'd gotten it, and my answer had simply been _Jacob didn't want me to go_. He'd run a gentle finger over the bruise while the muscle in his jaw had ticked in fury. His beautiful eyes had sparked with flame, and he'd taken a deep breath before continuing to speak.

I had to admit, hearing Lisa tell of Edward's anger on my behalf was giving me warm fuzzy feelings. It was just like him, too, to be that upset about a situation involving me and to never actually show me how affected he really was. Edward was always trying to 'protect' me, in any way he could. The girls and I chatted about a few other things, before deciding to call it a night. Heather generously gave me a ride home, and she grilled me for details about the developments with Edward while we drove.

"So, really darling... Are you happy?" She smiled at me, already knowing what the answer was.

"Ridiculously. You have _no_ idea." We both laughed aloud at that, and settled into a comfortable silence. Silence was always comfortable with Heather... we were so close that we didn't need to fill space with mindless chatter.

I tucked myself into bed that night, at peace with everything in my world for the first time in awhile.

**Twenty years old**

"_Happy birthday, Bella!" I grinned at the body that went flying by before I really had a chance to thank them. Alice had thrown me a gigantic birthday party at her parent's place, and I had to admit that I only knew a small percentage of the people there. I had the sneaking suspicion that some were just random party-crashers, but I didn't really care that much. Edward had driven out to be here with me for my birthday, and that was all that mattered. _

_The house was so crowded that we were definitely out of chairs, and bodies were spilling out across the back lawn. I laughed heartily as Mike accidentally lit the burgers on fire on the barbeque, and sent a wry glance at Edward._

"_We might be putting you to work tonight, Fire Boy." He grinned as his emerald eyes sparkled. He glanced behind me slightly, and dodged forward to catch one of Alice's parents' kittens that had begun to fall off the back of an armchair. _

"_Hey look! The fireman's saving kittens already!" Someone shouted across the room. Edward had shown up to the party in a sleeveless t-shirt bearing his fireman's crest and the word 'firefighter' across the back. It had been an unending source of amusement for the increasingly drunk guests of the party. He laughed aloud as he sat in a kitchen chair and cradled the tiny kitten in his lap and out of harm's way. _

_As we attempted to chat and catch up in the midst of the chaos around us, I knelt on the floor beside his chair in order to hear him better... and also, because there was no spare chair to be found. I was leaning into him, listening to what he was saying with my hand on his knee to steady myself, when I heard it._

"_Couldn't wait to get on your knees, could you?" Jacob sneered from the doorway behind me. It had been just over a week since I'd kicked him out, and I had to admit that I wasn't too happy about him crashing this party. Edward's previously laughing expression had fallen into a dark scowl, and he glared at Jacob hotly. Standing up, he held the kitten in one hand and grasped my wrist in the other. _

"_Come on, Bella. Let's go upstairs." I knew that Edward meant to go upstairs only to get me away from Jacob, but the furious expression on Jacob's face for what he interpreted 'upstairs' to mean only made me smirk evilly at him. Good, let him think that. _

**Present day**

The phone ringing woke me up. Groggily reaching for the handset, I smacked my hand on the top of the dresser a couple times before I located it.

"... 'lo?" I mumbled blearily. I could hear a rich chuckle from the other end of the line.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty. Time to rise and shine." Damn Edward for his ability to be chipper at ungodly hours of the morning. I mentally debated hanging up on him, but managed to resist the temptation only because I wanted to know what he was calling for.

"What d'you want?" Okay, so I probably sounded grumpier than a woman speaking to her brand-new lover should, but I figured he knew what he was getting into when he called me this early. He chuckled again, clearly having expected my reaction.

"I'd appreciate being let inside." _Huh? _Was the only thought my quasi-functioning brain could manage.

"Huss'at?" I echoed out-loud. What the hell was he talking about?

"Go to your window." Groaning aloud, I forced myself out of my nice warm bed and over to my bedroom window, taking the phone with me.

"This better be worth it..." I mumbled into the receiver. When I got to the window, I froze in shock.

There he stood, in a pair of cargo shorts and a white sleeveless under-shirt, just below my window. When he saw me at the window, he grinned widely and pulled his free hand out from behind his back, baring a single black rose. _God, he is just too perfect to be real_.

"Can I come in?" I could hear the thread of amusement in his voice, and I felt an answering grin begin to twitch at the corner of my lips.

"Well, since you're bribing me with my favourite flower, I suppose I _have_ to let you in..." I watched as he clicked off his cell phone, and started toward my front door.

After letting him in, we mutually decided on another round of our famous pancakes for breakfast. As I was stirring the batter together, I could hear my cell phone vibrating on the nightstand in my bedroom. _Probably Alice telling me when she's coming home_. I glanced toward Edward absently.

"Grab that, will you?" He nodded at me and left to get the phone. "Who was it?" I queried when I saw him reappear in the doorway. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Missed call. There isn't a name, just the phone number." My brow furrowed at that. Pretty much anybody who was important to me was listed in my Contacts, and would have shown up with a name. He tilted the phone toward me so that I could see the number, and I immediately felt the blood drain out of my face.

"That's Jacob's number..."

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**A/N: Thank an adorably drunk Heather for this chapter. I wrote it while she texted me inebriated nonsense, since she's out celebrating her almost-end of exams tonight. That girl is just too bloody cute. **

**Yes, my poor friend was subjected to many firefighter jokes on the night of my 20th birthday, most of which came from people that neither of us knew. And yes, the 'saving kittens' comment really was made. You should have seen him blush at that one, it was hilarious. **

**Leave me some yummy reviews, you know how I love them! And try to refrain from nasty ones over my not-so-pleasant portrayal of Jacob... I _did_ warn you at the beginning of the chapter.  
**


	13. Surprises Aplenty

"Seriously, you're going to have to help me..." I sighed and handed the rock climbing harness to Edward. I was always a little useless at trying to figure out how to get into those things. He set it up on the floor, and motioned for me to step into it. As he tightened the straps around my waist and my legs, my mind wandered once again to pondering over the whole issue of the call from Jacob. _What the hell does he want now?_

There had been a short while after we had been broken up for a few months when he had come back to me with a sob-story about how he wanted to be friends again, and that he missed me. Not wanting to be a huge bitch, I'd tried to be friends. It had only been a big mistake, to say the least. Even as 'friends' he had tried to control my life, and I'd finally gotten sick of it and stopped talking to him. I felt teeth surreptitiously nip the inside of my thigh, and it shocked me out of my unhappy thoughts.

"Edward!" I hissed, trying not to bring attention to what he'd just done, considering we were in a public place. He flashed a grin at me, and rose to stand in front of me.

"You spaced out on me, Bells. Had to get your attention somehow." I rolled my eyes at him, and followed him over to one of the routes. "Ready to get warmed up?"

**Twelve years old**

_Edward flashed a grin at me while he jumped down from the tree. I had brought him out to the cabin that Charlie liked to go to on some weekends, and we'd been having a great time. _

"_Bella..." His voice sounded nervous, and I frowned a little as I tried to figure out why. "You're my girlfriend, right?" I blushed as I nodded my head. I still hadn't gotten used to that fact yet. He flashed a grin at me, and stuck his hands in the back pockets of his denim shorts. "When do I get to kiss you?"_

_I felt my eyes widen in surprise, and for a moment my brain stopped working. Kissing? I'd forgotten that 'girlfriend' and 'boyfriend' usually meant kissing. Were we even supposed to be kissing at the age of twelve? I bit my lip a little, and suddenly flashed a grin at him._

"_Surprise me!" I said. There, now I didn't have to make the choice of 'when', he did. His eyebrows rose a little, but he nodded his head._

"_Okay."_

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_I could feel the sun beating down on my face as I lay stretched across one of the benches in Charlie's boat. Edward and I had decided to take a break from swimming in the lake to lay out and relax a little. We'd talked about a whole bunch of things, like what superhero was the best one or the various reasons why the boys in our class were mean. They'd begun picking on me and Edward a lot, because we were going out. They said that they guessed freaks belonged together. _

_It bugged us, but we were happy being around each other. We always had been. A shadow moved over me, blocking the sun from beating against my closed eyelids. Wondering what it was, I opened my eyes. All that I saw above me were his bright eyes, and I barely heard him speak._

"_Surprise..." He said with a cheeky grin, seconds before he nervously pressed his lips to mine in a hesitant and soft kiss. When he pulled back, he bit the corner of his lip and waited for my reaction. I smiled giddily and giggled at him._

"_I like surprises..." I breathed, and watched him smile in that way that I loved._

**Present day**

"You can get this bitch, Bella! You know you can!" My arms were shaking with the effort of hanging onto the slim holds on the wall, and I had no more than the edge of my toe keeping my foot in place. I glared at the hold above me that I needed to grab. It was just a few inches too high up for me, so in order to grab it I was going to have to throw myself upwards, completely letting go of the wall with my foot and letting both feet hang freely in the air.

Essentially having myself attached to the wall by only two fingertips while I made the lunge for that hold was a little out of my comfort range. I glanced down below me to where Edward was belaying for me, and the intense look of will on his face was what convinced me to go for it. Edward believed that I could do it... and let's face it, even if I went for the move and missed it, Edward's hand on the ropes would keep me from falling.

Lunging upwards, I threw my entire body toward the hold, and watched as my hand slid sideways to cram in-between the fake-rock and the wall. My legs hung in the air, and the majority of my body weight now rested on that hand. _Oh my freaking god... I did it._

I heard a triumphant shout from below me, and turned my head to look down at him again. He pumped a fist into the air and laughed as he gazed at me, his face registering a look of awe.

"You did it! You really fucking did it! Oh my god!" I laughed a little at that. Only Edward would be so excited over someone else's victory that he'd completely forget to watch his language in a public place. "That's my girl!" A part of me began to melt at those words. _I really love being your girl..._

He flashed me that crooked grin, and a vague sense of 'uh oh' came upon me.

"Okay, now keep going to the top. You're only like seven feet away." The smile melted off my face, and I rolled my eyes at him. The man was a slave driver. Sighing in defeat, I turned back to the wall and continued the hellish climb.

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Edward laughed as we waited for our hamburgers to be made, his laughter making me smile all the more. It was infectious. We'd decided to go out for a quick bite to eat for dinner after the rock climbing, and I had to admit that I was starved. It wasn't often that I could persuade myself to do anything physically active, but as sore as I was and knew I would be by tomorrow, I couldn't make myself regret the day with him. Just being around Edward made me feel so much more alive... he had such passion inside of him for everything around him, and when we were together I felt as though I was seeing the world around me through new eyes – through _his_ eyes.

We both glanced toward the glass door beside where we were standing, surprised at how much darkness had fallen in the short time since we'd entered the fast-food joint. Our images were reflected on the glass back at us, and I took a moment to study our two forms. After the climbing we had both changed into clean clothes, and I'd left my hair up in its messy gathering on top of my head. Tendrils of my hair hung about my face, framing it. I wore a black t-shirt from my favourite heavy metal band, and an old tatty pair of jeans.

Edward's hair was in its usual coppery mess, and looked deliciously rumpled. He'd changed into a plain black t-shirt and a faded pair of jeans, and despite the long and tiring day he still looked good enough to eat. I didn't realize that Edward had also been making the same comparisons about us in his head until he spoke.

"We look good together." I glanced at the reflection of his face, seeing a small smile playing about his lips. I felt myself blush a little as I watched his glass-self lean down and place a kiss on the side of my neck. "We always have, though."

**Thirteen years old**

_Recess wasn't far off of being over, and I let my feet wander aimlessly about the playground. Edward had broken up with me a couple weeks before to keep me from getting in any more trouble because of him, and because I felt weird about it I'd been avoiding him. Without Edward, I had no one to play with. _

_The other kids in our class had never been that nice to us. The girls didn't really like me because I was weird, and the boys liked to tell me that I was a freak and ugly. Edward didn't have it any easier. The boys always picked on him because he was a bit smaller than them, and because he was closest with a girl. In our class, the girls were friends with the girls, and the boys were friends with the boys. End of story. _

_Edward and I had always relied on each other, because we both knew how it felt to be bullied. Not only that, but bullied by the same people. They used to catch me after class when I was walking home and push me around, leaving bruises that I'd lie to my parents about. I knew that they'd take Edward's things and break them, which always made me mad. Some of the things that they'd ruined had been given to him by his dad, before he'd died. _

_I knew that I shouldn't be avoiding Edward, but I didn't know how to act around him. Even though he'd said that it was because he didn't want me getting in trouble because of him, a part of me worried that he'd really broken up with me because he didn't like me anymore. _

_My wanderings brought me to the top of the hill that over-looked the school tarmac. I stopped short when I saw Edward down there, being followed by the biggest bully in our class, Aro. I watched as Aro grabbed Edward by the back of his jacket, yanking him backwards harshly. I started to move down the hill, but then stopped myself. I was torn: I wanted to help Edward, but I also knew that a girl coming to his defense would only make it worse._

_I waited where I was, watching to see if he'd need my help. Edward pulled himself up off the ground where he'd landed, and angrily turned to face Aro. I could see his body trembling slightly. _

"_Hey, Cullen! Where's you're freakish girlfriend?" Aro taunted. I could feel a growl rising in my throat, but tamped it down. I didn't want them knowing I was there watching them yet. Aro turned momentarily back to his little gang of morons before continuing. "Oh, wait. That's right. She's not your girlfriend anymore, is she? Apparently Bella's too much of an ugly loser even for Cullen!" I watched in shock as Edward – who usually just tried to ignore those idiots, and never reacted back at them – launched himself at Aro and knocked them both to the ground. _

"_Don't you say anything about her!" He bellowed, and hit Aro in the mouth. The two boys scuffled around on the pavement, hitting each other for all they were worth before a teacher ran over to pull them apart. I watched as both Edward and Aro were hauled away to the office, glaring daggers at each other. _

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_I held the ice pack to his temple, and shifted on his couch so that he was leaning against me. I could feel soft trembles coursing through his body still, and tried to think of how to make him feel better. _

"_I've never been in a fight before..." I was surprised when he spoke, because his eyes were still closed. I shifted the ice pack to another spot on his face that was swelling a little, and chose my words carefully._

"_What did you fight about?" Neither Edward or any of the other boys had noticed me on the hill above them, and I was unsure as to whether or not I should tell him that I'd seen it all. As I studied his face, he frowned ferociously, still without opening his eyes. _

"_Nothing." He ground out angrily, and I could feel the muscles in his shoulders tense up. I decided to drop it, not wanting to only upset him further. _

_Edward had fought because of me. Edward's control over his emotions had snapped and he'd attacked his greatest tormentor, all because he'd been insulting me. A part of me warmed to the thought that Edward had come to my defense, and I absently brushed a kiss across his forehead. I heard him sigh, and he rested more fully back against me. _

"_Bells?" He whispered it, as though afraid. "Are you still my friend?" I felt a shaft of shame go through me. I'd been so very wrong to avoid him, just because I felt insecure. I hadn't thought at all about what my avoiding him would have done to Edward. And yet, he'd still put himself in harm's way for my sake. With that realization, I made a decision: never again would I avoid Edward. No matter what happened, no matter what he might unknowingly do to me, I was never going to abandon my best friend again. He may have broken up with me, but he was still the best friend that I had. No one was ever going to replace Edward. _

"_Yeah, Edward. I'm still your friend... I'm sorry."_

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_**A/N: Okay, I know, I know... It took me forever to get this to you guys. But! I have good excuses. I was actually part-way through writing this about a week ago when a power-outage decided to screw me over. Then, I got a new job and basically had no life because of it and apartment hunting until today. **

**Both the flashbacks: totally happened the way I wrote them. He's the entire reason why I love surprises now. And incase anyone wondered, I never did tell him that I saw that fight. I'm not sure why, but I just never did. **

**Leave me some reviews! You guys are honestly the most fantastic readers ever, and I love hearing from you. Let me know what you think, I like hearing your honest opinions.  
**


	14. Old Ghosts Come Calling

The insistent buzzing of my cell against the nightstand beside me broke into my concentration. Sighing to myself, I put down the book I had been trying to read, and grabbed the phone. I flipped it open without looking at it, and wearily skipped a hello.

"What, Alice?" My voice was filled with loving exasperation. Alice had gone out to see Jazz for another date, and was probably calling because she'd forgotten something. The expectant silence on the other end of the line was my first warning that something was wrong.

"... Bella?" I felt my blood go cold. _Holy shit, that's Jacob._ Silently cursing myself for not paying attention to _who_ was calling, I took a moment before answering.

"What." I bit the word out, more a demand to speak and be done with it than an actual question. I did _not_ have the patience to deal with Jacob and his bullshit.

"What's up?" I felt a sneer form on my face, even though he wasn't there to see it. _After all he's done, he thinks that he can just chat me up like we're still__** friends**__? Who is he kidding?_

"What do you want, Jacob?" I was making no effort to sound friendly, I really didn't care what he thought. I heard him sigh on the other end of the line, and hoped that I was making life difficult for him.

"Listen, Bella... I'm heading up north tomorrow, and I'll be passing through your town. I want you to meet me for some coffee." I felt one of my brows raise.

"Oh you do, do you?" He could tell by the tone of my voice that I was not pleased with the _demand_ for my presence. He sighed again.

"C'mon, Bella... I have some serious shit that I need to talk to you about." I bit my lip a little while I thought it over. Everything else in my life was going so well right now... I really didn't need a re-emergence of Jacob to fuck it all up. _Maybe if I agree to meet with him, he'll leave me alone._

"Fine. I'll meet you at the coffee shop on the corner at nine tomorrow morning." He seemed to let out a breath of relief.

"Okay, I'll come pick you up." I frowned at that. No bloody way was I going to get into a car with him.

"No. I'll meet you there." At least the coffee shop would be a public place. I hung up on him, and started dialing the number I needed most at that moment. When the phone picked up, I rushed to set forward my plan.

"Hey, Heather... I need a favour."

**Eight months ago**

_Alice and I laughed a little at the joke that Jacob had just told, and I felt a little relieved. This whole "let's be friends again" thing with Jacob had been pretty rocky, but at the moment he was behaving himself. We were all sitting on my queen-sized bed, relaxing a little._

"_Want a drink, Bells?" Alice asked me, and I had to admit that I was a bit thirsty. Nodding my head, we headed downstairs while Jacob waited for us to come back. We were downstairs for only a matter of moments, and were on our way back up, when Jacob came stomping past us down the stairs. "What's up?" Alice asked him._

"_Nothin'." He grumbled back at her. "I'm just not feelin' too well... gonna lay down." Alice and I looked at each other, then shrugged our shoulders. I headed back into my room, while Alice went to hers to get ready to go out. I saw it immediately._

_In the past year I had begun to keep a journal; it wasn't something that I typically would do, but it had been suggested to me as a great way to relieve some stress. Through the whole break-up drama with Jacob I had written in it, and even pasted in an old picture of us that I'd torn in two. My journal was now mysteriously in a different position than I usually left it. _

_That. Bastard._

_I heard Alice go out, and knew I was on my own for this one. I stomped downstairs, furious. By the look on his face, he knew what was coming. _

"_How'd my journal move, Jacob?" He shrugged his shoulders belligerently, as if I had no right to ask him that. I repeated the question, this time with a little more edge to it. _

"_Why are you asking me? I didn't touch nothin'." I glared daggers at him. _

"_Bullshit, you didn't touch anything. Don't fucking lie to me, Jacob." His eyes narrowed angrily, and I mentally prepared myself for the theatrics. Every time that Jacob got caught doing something wrong, his first reaction was always to try and turn the situation around so that somehow I was the one at fault._

"_Are you calling me a liar?!" I wanted to roll my eyes at him. Was he __**serious**__?_

"_Yes, I am! When have you __**not **__been a liar?! Give me one good fucking example!" His eyes lit with unwarranted rage, and he drew a fist up into the air beside his head. Before letting the punch fly, he stopped himself. I laughed at him. I actually laughed at him. "What? You gonna hit me? Go ahead, Jacob. Fucking punch me and see what happens." He clenched the fist even tighter. _

"_Don't fucking push me, Bella." He gritted out. I sneered at him derisively, not even caring in that moment whether he actually punched me or not. _

"_I'm done with this conversation." I turned my back on him, and climbed the stairs to my bedroom. I heard him stomping up them behind me, and slammed my bedroom door in his face, turning the lock immediately. He pounded on the door insistently. _

"_Bella, open the fucking door! I'm not done talking to you!" He yelled at me through the solid wood barrier. My eyes narrowed into slits, and I sucked in a breath to yell at him back._

"_Yeah? Well, I'm done with you. Get out." I heard a resounding crash, which I later found out had been his fist going straight through the stairwell wall. _

**Present day**

I opened up the front door to Heather, wishing that we were visiting each other on better terms. I was glad that she was coming with me for the meeting with Jacob, though. I wouldn't have put it past his psychotic behaviour to try and kidnap me, or something just as demented. We pulled in at the coffee shop early, and decided to get some breakfast.

"Thanks for coming with me, love." I was grateful that she had agreed to accompany me, I had been too uncomfortable with the thought of seeing him alone. Her pretty hazely-green eyes widened, and she looked at me in shock.

"As if I would _let_ you come by yourself! He's psycho! Who knows what he would try to do with you?" We settled in at a table, and I felt a tight ball of worry settle in my stomach. I was _not_ looking forward to this. "Did you tell Edward about this?" Her voice was a little hesitant. Heather was always conscientious about the effect that her words could have on others, and never wanted to make anyone uncomfortable. I shook my head at her.

"No, I didn't. He'd just get upset and angry, and I don't want to do that to him." She looked a little unsure of my answer, so I elaborated. "I'll probably tell him later, after the fact. It's not like I'm gonna try and keep it a secret from him or anything." She smiled a little at that, tucking her blond hair behind an ear.

Jacob was forty-five minutes late, by the time he got to the coffee shop. _Stupid dick, makes me meet him and then can't even be on time._ He looked surprised when he saw Heather sitting with me, and his lips tightened in a frown just a fraction. _Say something about it, I __**dare**__ you. _He settled into a chair at the table, and his gaze sought mine.

"Hey, Bella..." I avoided looking at him, uncomfortable with the way his eyes were sizing me up.

"Hi." My voice was stilted and hard, as unwelcoming as I could make it. "What did you want to talk about?" He shot a glance toward Heather, who was sitting there picking at her breakfast and trying to be as unobtrusive as possible. I knew she was uncomfortable with the situation, but I blessed her for being there.

"I wanted to see you again. I... Bella, I want us to be friends again. I really miss you, like, a lot." My head jerked around in surprise, and I stared at him incredulously. _Is he for real?_

"I don't think so." I wasn't _that_ stupid, thank you very much. He sighed out a breath, as though I was being unreasonable. I turned my face away again, not wanting to look him in the eye.

"Look at me when I talk to you." I slowly turned back to him, fire igniting in my eyes. _That's one._ I narrowed my gaze at him, and almost dared him to make another comment like that. I saw out of the corner of my eye that Heather had taken on a similar expression.

"Can we at least talk a little? Catch up? I mean, really, what's the harm in that?" I mentally rolled my eyes. _What's the harm in my stalker-like ex-boyfriend and I discussing the particulars of what I've been up to lately? Oh, nothing wrong with that picture, nooooooo... _Deciding to play along at least a little in the interest of getting him to go away faster, I answered the questions he asked in in short, monotone phrases, making sure not to give away too much information.

I had turned my head away from him again, and I felt him grip my shoulder to make me look at him. I bit back a growl, and my eyes narrowed dangerously. _That's two, asshole._ If he tried one more thing, I would deck him one right there in the middle of the coffee shop. I saw Heather's grip on her coffee cup tighten until the tips of her fingers were white, her lips pressed tightly together in an effort to restrain what she wanted to say. I'd had enough of it. Glancing at my watch, I prepared to make my exit.

"Well, I've got an appointment, so I have to go." I didn't even try to make myself sound convincing, since I didn't really care whether he believed me or not. Jacob stood up the same time that I did, and made a motion as if to reach for my hand... which ended when I backed up far enough to avoid him.

"I'll drive you home." His voice sounded hopeful, and I felt a chill run through me again.

"No, I'm riding with Heather."

"It's not difficult, I can take you." He was still pushing his luck.

"No, I came with Heather, I'll go home with her." Heather walked over to place herself firmly beside me, and I felt more at ease. He stared at the two of us for a moment, before frowning a bit.

"Alright." We said a stilted goodbye before Heather and I got in her car, locking the doors immediately behind us. We were silent for a few moments as we began the drive back to my place, and then I felt my cell phone start to ring. I checked the number and saw that it was Jacob. _What the __**hell**__ does he want?_

"What." I snapped at him. Heather threw me a worried look, knowing immediately from my tone who it was.

"That was really awkward, Bella. I felt like we didn't have a chance to really _talk_, y'know? We should meet for coffee again, but this time _alone_." My brows shot up, and for a moment I was actually shocked speechless. The boy **had** to be delusional if he thought that I'd actually agree to that.

"No." I didn't offer any explanation. To be honest, I didn't feel he deserved one.

"Why not?" He sounded surprised, as if he couldn't fathom why I was objecting at all. I frowned deeply and thought once again about how unstable he really was.

"Because I don't want to." He began to say something else, but I slapped the phone shut and cut off the call. I felt so emotionally drained, and I knew that Heather could tell. She glanced at me while still keeping an eye on the road.

"Want to go to the mall, darling?" I smiled at her, if a little weakly, and nodded my head. The mall sounded lovely.

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I felt a small hole tear into the knee of my new jeans, and whispered a curse. _Ah well, denim never survives long with me_. I shimmied my way higher on the drainpipe, and huffed out a breath. _Damn, this was easier when I was twelve_. I looked above me and saw that I was only a few feet away from Edward's bedroom window. I finished my somewhat perilous climb, and tapped lightly on the window. I could see him in bed, and felt a little bad that I was about to wake him. I tapped again, and saw him raise his head towards the sound.

His eyes widened a little in surprise to see me perched out on his ledge like in the old days, just before that crooked grin of his slowly spread across his face. He jumped out of bed and opened up the window for me.

"Felt adventurous today?" He whispered to me. I rolled my eyes at him while he helped me through the window. As soon as my feet were on the floor, I began stripping off clothes with every intention of spending the night at the Cullen house. After the anxiety and tension that the meeting with Jacob had stirred up, I wanted a night of feeling loved and protected.

"Apparently." I answered him, before crawling into his bed and taking the side closest to the wall. He climbed in behind me, and wrapped an arm around my waist. I instantly began to feel better with the touch, and felt myself begin to relax for the first time that day. He pressed a kiss to the back of my neck, and settled himself in a more comfortable position. I savoured the feeling of a calm Edward, because I knew that he was going to blow his lid tomorrow when I told him about Jacob.

"Goodnight, Bells." He whispered to me. I squeezed his arm a little, and closed my weary eyes.

"Goodnight, Edward." I whispered back. _God, I love him so much._

_

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_**A/N: I know, I'm in severe danger of all of you turning on me for how long it took to update this time. Heather says she's sorry, because she's been too busy to nag me to do it lately. But, she found the time to nag me into this, so rejoice!**

**Both the flashback and the coffee scene come from my own personal 'Jacob', and yes he is that big of a douche. He's one step away from a restraining order, to be honest. At least on here I can do to him whatever my vindictive little heart desires.**

**Leave me some more reviews; you guys have been just fantastic with them! I love you all!  
**


	15. Colours Seem to Fade

Edward's alarm went off at four o'clock in the morning, jerking me awake suddenly. I sleepily opened my eyes, as I felt him slide his arm from around my waist. He pressed a kiss to the side of my neck before getting out of bed, and I turned to watch him.

"It's just work, Bells." His voice was rough with sleep, and he rubbed a hand over tired eyes. "Go back to sleep, baby." Stubborn to a fault, I continued to watch his progress around the room. He gathered up the equipment he needed, making an obvious effort to be as silent as possible due to the ungodly hour that it was. When he finished, Edward bent his big frame over the bed to give me a soft kiss goodbye, before quietly leaving the room.

I drifted back into sleep while marveling over his dedication to his job... the fact that he would wake at such a heinous hour for it was amazing to me.

**Fourteen years old**

_I stared down at the words on the page in front of me, while my thoughts began whirling inside my head. _

_'It has sometimes been observed that victims of excessively traumatic events may manifest their feelings of stress and emotional scarring through physical markers, such as loss in weight, developing pale or gaunt features, or even some minimal loss of pigmentation in their hair.'_

_I chewed on my lip in deep thought, and turned to look at Edward, who was sitting a couple of seats down from me in the library. Just as I'd known, there above his left ear was a small patch of hair that was completely grey. I wondered to myself about whether that was a sign that Edward had been through some kind of traumatic event that I didn't know about. _

_He came to sit beside me, and his green eyes twinkled as he poked me in the ribs. Where usually I would have reacted back at him, today I was too lost in my growing suspicion about Edward's grey hair to notice. He looked at me confusedly. _

"_What's up, Bells? You lost in thought again?"_

"_Yeah... sort of." I hedged. Curiosity had pulled me in; I couldn't stand the thought that there may be something about my Edward that I didn't know. "Edward..." I was hesitant, somehow instinctively knowing that I was entering dangerous territory. "D'you keep... secrets... from me?" He continued to look confused for a minute, and then his expression changed. _

_I watched the happiness slowly die out of his eyes, and felt my heart sink. He subconsciously raised a hand to twine in my hair, and his face changed so as though he looked almost haunted. _

"_There are... some things I can't talk to even you about, Bells... I'm sorry. Maybe one day I'll have it in me to tell you..." I felt my heart break at his tortured gaze, and I forcefully shoved my curiosity aside. He leaned forward to kiss me on the forehead, the gesture somehow encompassing both forgiveness for my asking the question, and regret for the fact that he wouldn't give me an answer. He silently got up and left the library._

_I found myself fighting back tears as the terrible realization hit me: I'd been right. Something awful had happened to my Edward... something that he wouldn't tell even me._

**Present day**

Edward and I sat at a small table in the ice cream parlour, and I poked at my ice cream with my spoon while I contemplated how to tell him about the meeting with Jacob the day before. I was chewing on my lip when he suddenly made it insanely easy for me.

"What's wrong, Bells?" I jerked my attention to his face at the sound of his voice.

"Why do you think that something's wrong?" I hedged. He rolled his eyes at me.

"You mean aside from the fact that you've been my best friend for more than half my life? Or the fact that most of the time I know you better than you know yourself?" Okay, so he had a point. I took a deep breath before telling him. I knew how best-friend-Edward would react to the news, but I wasn't sure that shiny-new-boyfriend-Edward would be able to keep his cool.

"Um... well, Jacob called me two days ago." The soft smile that had played around his lips faded from his face. "He said that he had to talk to me about something important, and wanted to meet yesterday morning at the coffee shop." I could see a spark of anger kindle in his eyes, but he kept silent for me to finish the tale. "I went with Heather, and she stayed with me the whole time. Jacob wanted to be friends again, but I told him 'no' and we left."

I was nervous as I waited for him to speak, which was an odd feeling. I mean, this was _Edward_. He'd stayed silent, but I could practically see the flames in those emerald eyes. He heaved out a breath, and then began.

"As your best friend, I think you should have told him to go to hell instead of actually meeting him... but it was a very good idea for you to bring Heather instead of going alone." I nodded my head, having known that best-friend-Edward would have said something like that.

"And as my boyfriend? What does boyfriend-Edward think?" He seemed completely unsurprised that I had technically just assigned him multiple personalities.

"Boyfriend-Edward is fucking livid." I raised an eyebrow at that, as he had said the strong words in an almost neutral tone of voice.

"You're pissed at me?" My voice was incredulous. He sighed, and began subconsciously playing with my hair.

"No, Bells, I'm not pissed at you. What I'm pissed about is the fact that the asshole won't leave you alone." I relaxed at that, and leaned into him slightly. He was gripping the edge of the table with his one hand, and his knuckles had gone white. I'd never seen Edward like this before, and I had to admit... I was a little turned on. _God, something is wrong with me_.

Just then, Edward's cell phone rang and broke the moment. I watched as he answered it, his already slightly frowning face becoming just a bit more severe. _It must be work_. My suspicions were confirmed when he hung up and shot me a regretful glance.

"Sorry, Bells, but I've got to go in. Station Two caught a big blaze and needs our guys to back them up." I smiled at him, and squelched down my disappointment. There were people who needed him more than me right then.

"No problem... I'll walk home from here, so you don't need to waste time taking me home." I knew that he needed to get his gear and get out to the fire as soon as possible. He frowned just a little bit more.

"Are you sure?" I laughed a little at that.

"What am I, six? I'll be fine, Edward, don't worry." He bent over to give me a hurried kiss, and I caught his sleeve. "Edward?" The small hints of fear in voice clued him in to what I was about to say.

"I know, Bells. 'Be Safe', right?" He flashed me one of his crooked grins, and turned away to head out the door. I caught sight of the small patch of grey hair above his left ear as he walked away from me. _That's right, Bella... He's been through worse. He can handle it._

Even with that thought, I still worried about him.

**Twenty years old**

_I gleefully tossed away the text book I had been trying to force myself to read when the phone rang. I answered it eagerly, hoping that it was someone from back home that could successfully distract me from my studies. At this point, I was desperate enough to take a telemarketer. My heart sped up just a little bit when I realized that it was Edward calling. _

"_Hey, Fire boy... what's up?" My cheerfulness over his call died a little when I realized how heavy the silence at the other end of the line was. Eventually, he spoke up._

"_Bells?... D'you remember that thing that I wouldn't tell you?" I caught my breath. Edward had systematically refused for the last six years to tell me only one thing. My stomach began to twist into knots as I realized that I was most likely about to hear what it was. _

"_Yes..." I drew the word out, not too sure that I really wanted to know anymore. He sighed heavily over the line, and every fibre of my being wished to be there with him right at that moment. _

"_When I was... younger... my dad died." I waited patiently, having already known that fact. "He... died of a heart attack, when he was only forty-one." My brows raised, surprised at the news. To have died of a heat attack at so young of an age must have been hard on the family. _

"_Oh, honey..." My heart ached for him. Before I could search for something more to say, he cut me off._

"_That's not all of it." I caught my breath again, instinctively knowing that what he was about to say was the very thing that he couldn't bring himself to tell me all of these years. "I... Christ, Bells, I was there." My blood went cold in my veins, and the only thought that went through my head was 'what?'. Now that he had begun, the words seemed to rush out of him. _

"_I was messing around in the kitchen with him, trying to think of what he could make for me and the boys for dinner that night 'cause mum was out. I... I thought that he was playing some kind of trick at first, it didn't make sense why he would just suddenly be on the floor... I started yelling for him to get up, I didn't know what to do and he was scaring me. I finally thought to grab the phone and call for an ambulance, but I was so scared and confused... By the time they got there, it was too late. When they came in, I was sitting on the floor and he was laid out across my lap... I didn't want to let him go."_

_I could feel silent tears tracing their way down my face for his tale. I had suspected for years that something traumatic had happened to him... but never would I have guessed this. I couldn't even imagine the pain that something like that could cause a person... to have your own father die in your arms, when you were just a child._

"_Edward..." I breathed, not even knowing what I could say. Once again, his voice broke in before I had to find words._

"_I just... we did this call today. A first response, before the ambulance shows up, you know? When we got there, it was this old guy that'd had a heart attack, and his daughter had found him. Just... the look on her face... it brought it all back for me. Jazz and Em are too young to remember it, thank God. It just... I kept thinking about it, and I needed to talk to someone. I needed you." Suddenly, there was only one thing that I needed to say._

"_Do you want me with you? I'll take the midnight bus down there if you want me to come." There was a small silence on the line before he spoke again._

"_Bells... it's a four hour bus ride."_

"_I don't care."_

"_You have class tomorrow."_

"_I'll skip." I waited for him to make the decision. "Edward... if you need me there, nothing on this earth will stop me."_

"_Yeah... I need you." The second I hung up the phone, I yanked my duffel bag out of the closet and began throwing what I needed hurriedly into it._

**Present day**

I left the ice cream parlour as Edward pulled out of the parking lot, giving him a small wave goodbye. The sun was almost set, drenching the world around me in dimness. _Ah, twilight. My favourite time of day_.

I swung my arms lightly as I walked, content to let my thoughts drift in and out of nothingness. My feet ran on auto-pilot to carry me home, and I hummed a small tune under my breath.

I was a couple streets away from home when a chill suddenly raced up my spine, almost making me stop dead in my tracks. I glanced nervously around, but couldn't dispel the feeling of unseen eyes watching my every move. I sped up until I reached home, convincing myself that the dark was just getting to me.

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**A/N: You all must be in shock... an update so soon after the last one? What is the world coming to? Well, actually, it just means that Heather's been on the ball with cracking the whip at me this time around. What can I say? What Heather wants, Heather gets.**

**For those of you who may think the story about the heart attack a little over-dramatic, I would like to merely say that it is an actual situation that happened to a friend of mine, and a ver scarring one at that. **

**I realize there hasn't been a lot of fluffiness in these last two chapters, I promise the next one will have some happiness to it. And where the eff did Tanya go? I'll bring her back soon for us all to hate, have no fear. **

**As per usual, leave me some delicious reviews! Loves ya.  
**


	16. All the Mushiness You Need

_Real men aren't this perfect._ The thought wound its way through my mind absently as I tried to calm my breathing, which was gasping out of me at a fast pace. Edward nuzzled his face into the curve of my neck as he leaned heavily on his arms above me, his sweaty chest heaving in and out. He pressed a kiss there, and rolled to his side so as not to crush me with his weight.

I drew the blanket up over both our exhausted bodies, and laid my head into the curve of his shoulder. It was the nights that I loved the most about being with him; there was no better feeling in the world than to have his arms around me. When I was encompassed by his bigger frame, I felt so loved and protected… it was like nothing could touch me. I'd never felt like that before in my life.

"God, I love you…" I murmured to him. A fraction of a second later, my body froze in realization of what I'd just said to him. I'd told Edward that I loved him before… but always in the platonic best-friend way. I waited with bated breath to see his reaction, half hoping that he wouldn't read anything into it, and half hoping that he would. As far as first confessions of love went, post-sex was probably _not_ the best way to go. It was too easy to confuse passion for love that way.

Edward said nothing at first, but I had felt his body still at the words. He shifted so that he was leaning over me, propped on one arm and staring down at my face. I avoided his gaze, suddenly too afraid to look at him. He gently grabbed me by the chin, and forced me to look at him. His gorgeous eyes were full of confusion, urgency, and a little bit of softness. His voice was hushed when he spoke.

"Can you repeat that again?" He stared down at me intently when making the request, and I felt myself chickening out like the coward I was.

"What? I've said that before…" He shook his head at me, and held my head still when I tried to turn it again.

"Never like that, you haven't. Say it again." Staring into his eyes, I could deny him nothing. I was leaving myself open to a world of pain here… but I had to just leap and trust him not to break my heart.

"I love you." I said the simple phrase with all of the feeling I'd had locked within me for so many years, feeling a sudden weight lifted off of me for the confession. This had been the one big secret that I'd kept from him… For half my life I had been completely unable to tell my best friend that I was hopelessly in love with him.

His jaw clenched at my voice, a muscle in his cheek flexing at the pressure. He softly stroked a hand down the side of my face, before leaning more fully over me to rest his forehead atop mine. I could barely hear him when he spoke, but the words still slammed into me all the same.

"I've been waiting eleven years to hear you say that…" His voice held a measure of relief, but all my mind could function enough to think was, _Wait… what?_

"What?" I stammered out. _Smooth, Bella. Real suave._ He lifted his head, and stared down into my eyes. I could see the emotion swirling in them clear as day, and my heat began to beat double-time.

"I love you, Bella… More than you could ever know." I felt tears prick at my eyes, and inwardly cursed myself for the girly reaction. _Dreaming… I must be dreaming._

**Sixteen years old**

_I stared down at the little test strip in dismay. 'Positive'. It couldn't be! Charlie was going to absolutely kill me. I rested a shaking hand over my abdomen, and tried to make my shocked mind work. I couldn't be pregnant… I was only sixteen!_

_How was I going to tell my parents? How was I going to tell Kyle? He was more immature than I was, there was no way that the two of us could take care of a baby! I tossed the pregnancy test at the garbage pail, sliding down the wall to sit in a huddle on the floor and cry my young heart out. _

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_I headed to my math classroom, dreading seeing Kyle there. I still hadn't gotten the nerve to tell him I was pregnant, and I was already two months along. Pretty soon, I wouldn't have to tell him… He'd be able to tell all on his own. _

_I stopped mid-stride as a blindingly sharp pain flashed through my abdomen. I gripped my stomach, crying out a little in surprise. I felt the pain surge through me again, and ran for the bathroom down the hall. The sight of the blood made my body go cold._

_Saying a mental 'Fuck it' to class, I headed for the doctor's office. As I made my way, I already knew that my body was telling me there was no longer any baby to tell anyone about. Tears began to fall in steady streams, and I wished heartily that I had Edward with me to tell me everything would be okay._

_I may have been only sixteen, I may have been too immature to be a mother, and I may have been only two months along… But God damn it, I had just lost a child nonetheless. _

**Present day**

When Edward got home from work that night, I was curled up in his chair wearing a little white tank-top and an old pair of his jeans that were just small enough to fit me. Giving him a radiant smile as he walked in all tired and worn out, I couldn't help but marvel at the wonderful place that my life was currently in. _He loves me… He really loves me._

"How was work?" He threw me a tired smile, before answering with an ultra-smooth Edward line.

"As good as it can be, when I'm not with you." He flashed that crooked grin at me, and I rolled my eyes at him to let him know that I was on to his BS… even if I was secretly still touched by the cheesy line.

"What's the plan for tonight?" I questioned, only knowing that I wanted to be with him rather than at home by myself.

"Actually, I was thinking we might go see Heather tonight." My grin grew even wider as I processed what that meant. 'Go see Heather' usually meant 'Go eat dinner at the restaurant Heather works at and see Heather'. _I get dinner out… awesome!_

When we got there, Heather tossed us a huge smile as we sat in her section. She automatically brought Edward a tall root beer, and bent down to give us both hugs.

"What would you like to drink, darling? I wasn't sure if you were in the mood for alcohol today or not." I pondered it over for a second, but didn't really feel like a drink-drink.

"I'll just have some root beer, too." She flashed us a smile and a wink before sashaying away to grab my soda. Edward was already nose-deep in the menu, so I decided that I might as well try to figure out what I wanted to eat. The choice apparently wasn't an easy one for me, since I still hadn't made up my mind even after Edward had chosen his spaghetti and meatballs with extra meatballs.

"Edward…" I stretched out, making him raise an eyebrow at me. "What do I want?" He smiled softly at me, fully used to my expectation that he would know my thoughts even when I didn't.

"You like the mushroom ravioli, don't you?" He was right, I did… but my stomach turned over at the thought of it. Scrunching up my face a little, I shook my head.

"I don't really feel like it today…" He laughed lightly, and frowned a little in concentration down at the menu.

"How about Balsamic Chicken?" _That_ one sounded good to me. We each enjoyed our meals whilst flirting shamelessly with our waitress; one of my favourite things about going to see Heather at the restaurant was making her laugh.

I had Edward in stitches laughing as well while we ate, as I related to him a hilarious fan fiction story that I'd been reading that day that featured talking girly-parts with the perverted mindset of men.

We spent a leisurely time eating our dinner, and I wolfed down a generous helping of cheesecake for dessert. _God, he spoils me._ We went back to the Cullen household that night, and for the second time I fell asleep listening to Edward telling me that he loved me.

_Life is good._

_

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_**A/N: Here you go, a little bit of fluff that I promised you after all the angsty-ness of the last two chapters. Yay, Edward said he loved her! Another relationship-hurdle jumped. **

**I just have to pimp this fanfic: "Work in Progress" by Araeo. It is so hilarious, I was literally laughing so hard that I almost fell off my chair. And yes, this would be the fic featuring the pervy talking ovaries. It is fantastic, take my word for it. Go read it: **http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/4874316/1/Work_In_Progress.** Do it now! :D**

**As always, I eagerly await your reviews and comments! I love them so.  
**


	17. Holding On

**A/N: Just letting you guys know, this is going to be far from a happy chapter.**

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I should have known better, to be honest. In my life, it just seems to be inevitable. Every time that things finally start to go right for me, something has to turn out incredibly wrong, just to put me back in my place.

I had moved back up north for my final year of university, which was hard on its own, but manageable. I'd had to leave Edward for school before… just because we were 'together' now didn't really mean that the distance would change. I had barely begun my classes for my final Honours year, when the phone call came.

"Hey, baby… I've got some bad news." I listened to Charlie's distraught voice over the line, and tried to figure out what the problem was. The words _I've got some bad news_, when coming from Charlie, usually meant that someone had died. I had a large family, so I was somewhat used to getting calls that some family member that I hadn't seen since I was four years old had passed away. I wondered which of them it was this time.

"What's up, Dad?" I could hear him suck in a deep breath over the line, as if preparing himself. A sinking feeling began in my stomach.

"Pam died tonight." I heard the words, even comprehended them somewhere in my brain, but I just couldn't believe them. Pam was Alice's mother… that couldn't be who he was talking about, could it?

"Pam?" I said, disbelieving.

"Yes."

"Pam, as in Alice's _mother_, Pam?!" I could hear him sigh.

"Yes." I wanted with all my heart to reject it. It just couldn't be true… could it? She was still in her forties!

"What happened?" How could someone still so young be dead? I heard rustling on Charlie's end of the line, and I could easily imagine him rubbing his eyes to dispel a headache just then.

"They think it was some kind of massive heart failure." I swallowed down the sick feeling that I had. Alice's mom had been pretty overweight, and smoked like a chimney. Heart failure was entirely likely, under the circumstances.

After saying a few more things to my father, I hung up the phone. My tired mind couldn't wrap itself around the concept, still. I huddled into a ball on the end of my couch, and cried out my heartache. Grabbing my cell phone, I sent a text to Edward. _I need you right now._

**Seventeen years old**

"_I just wish that they'd listen to me! I mean, it's not like I'm a child anymore!" Pam stayed quiet and let me scream my frustrations out, her gaze toward me soft. When I'd finally calmed down a little, she spoke._

"_They're just worried about you, sweetheart. You won't talk to either of them, and you spend all your time locked up in your bedroom… They just want to know that you're okay. How will they know that if you won't talk to them?"_

_Her words were calm, and made sense. I didn't want to carry any blame, though. It was much easier for me to pretend that my parents were just being unreasonable. Pam twirled my ponytail around her fingers, as people had been doing to me my entire life. It was a gesture that soothed me. _

_Alice came out of the back of their apartment, where the bedrooms were, and sat down beside me. She laid down with her head resting on my lap, while she pouted up at me. _

"_Why don't you call and tell them you're staying out here tonight? You know if you're with Mom they won't argue." Pam nodded her head to say that she was fine with that plan, as well. _

**Present Day**

The travel back home had been a long and exhausting trek, seeing as how I'd left up north at about five o'clock in the morning. When I got off the bus, Edward was there. I had never been so happy to see him in my life, I'm sure.

I walked slowly toward where he waited for me, and when I got there, I was wrapped in a strong and secure pair of arms. _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry._ I had barely begun my school year, and already I had turned around and taken leave. I would be down south for about a week while my family helped Alice's get the funerary arrangements made.

I spent that first night back at Edward's house, laying quietly side-by-side and lost in my thoughts. He didn't mind the quiet, instinctively understanding that I needed it. This was about to turn into the longest week of my life.

----------------------

Alice was picking at the food on her plate, when we got there. She didn't get up from her seat on the floor as I walked over and sat on the couch behind her, and I could see that she was handling the situation about as well as could be expected. I ran a hand through her hair, trying to communicate comfort, understanding, and sorrow all at the same time.

She got up and sat her tiny form on my lap, just like we had always done while growing up. I spotted Jasper coming out of the back of the apartment, and I found some relief in the fact that she'd had him to console her. He came over to give me a kiss on the forehead, and I knew that he was just as broken up about Pam's death as the rest of us were.

I sat there with Alice cuddled on my lap, her head resting on my shoulder and my fingers playing with her hair, while the conversation flowed around us. I couldn't imagine what she was going through right at that moment. Pam had been like another mother to me, and I was torn up about her death, but I had no idea how it would feel to lose your own mother. I thought of my mother, Renée, and couldn't picture my life without her vibrant personality a part of it.

The next few days passed in a whirlwind of necessary chores; I took Alice and her younger sister, Ashley, shopping for clothes to wear for the funeral; there were flower arrangements to choose and pictures to be chosen for display. The day of the wake, I stayed at the funeral home the whole day to be with Alice. I kept myself so busy fetching tissues and glasses of water for her family that I could keep myself together.

It wasn't until that evening that I fell apart. At the end of the night, I stared down into Pam's coffin, trying to come to terms with the fact that this vital woman was no longer going to be a part of my life. The thought that she was never going to see her girls married, was never going to hold her grandchildren, was almost too much to bear for me.

I felt a strong hand run up my back, and without needing to look, I knew that Edward had arrived. I turned and buried my face in the crook of his neck, and the tears I had been holding at bay all day burst forward. I gripped his black dress shirt in my fist, needing something to hold onto desperately. He wrapped me securely in his arms, rubbing my back soothingly and kissing my forehead.

"Are you… are you coming to the funeral tomorrow?" I forced my swollen eyes to look up at his face, almost afraid that he would say he couldn't. I knew he had work, and I felt like it was selfish of me to want him there. But, oh God, did I ever want him to be there with me.

"I booked off work… I'll come back to your place tonight, and then we can go together tomorrow, okay?" I nodded, and laid my head back on his shoulder. I could feel him leading me over to some chairs, and I let myself be led. I didn't have the strength to do anything anyways.

The funeral itself passed by in a haze for me. My family and Edward sat in the row behind Alice's family, and I gripped onto his hand tightly the whole time. I cried a lot at the anecdotes that some of the family got up to tell by way of a eulogy, and I smiled a little when Jasper passed by us as a pallbearer for the coffin. I knew that he was honoured to perform such a duty.

We spent the majority of that night sitting with Alice and her father, talking about anything and everything that came to mind. I was going to return up north for school the next day, and a part of me felt incredibly bitter about that. It was almost as if the universe was saying to me, _Your week of scheduled grieving is over… Now go back to school and be a good student._

I felt as though I was supposed to just push it all behind me and move on, like it was nothing. I don't think that I had ever resented being away for school quite as much as I did then.

* * *

**A/N: I know that it's been forever since I updated this, and I really am sorry. Life kind of caught up to me, between going back to school, school work, and the death of my best girl friend's mother. She was an incredibly important part of my life, and I'm not handling her death overly well. I had thought that perhaps writing about it on here would give me a way to work some of my feelings out, but I hope you guys will forgive me for the lapse. **

**Sorry that this wasn't the fluffy chapter that you were hoping for, but I promise that I Bella will be feeling much better by the next chapter.**

**As usual, leave me some reviews.  
**


	18. Vodka Wisdom

The marker squeaked a little as I finished up the sentence I was writing on the wall. Call this my one scholastic quirk: It was much easier for me to follow my own thought processes when it came to writing papers if I spread them out somewhere that I could take it all in. Therefore, what had more space for me to indulge in what Alice liked to call my 'Beautiful Mind' moments, than the wall?

Scribbled on it already were notes about fifteenth century Venetian marriage rites, alongside some horrific details concerning the _Sonderkommandos_ of the Nazi concentration camps of World War II. Each note had its own colour, a code that only really made sense somewhere in my twisted little mind.

After returning up North from the funeral, I had thrown myself into my schoolwork with a vengeance in order to take my mind away from its turbulent thoughts. At least I was getting some work done, for once.

After living in the apartment all by myself for the better part of two months, I supposed that I shouldn't have been surprised that I was resorting to writing on walls. Shrugging it off, I decided to give myself a much needed break from the schoolwork. Clicking the kettle on to boil, I eagerly snatched up my cell phone to text – who else? – Edward.

_Did you know that in Venice in the 1400s girls got married at 16, but guys it was like 30? Sick._

I tossed the cell onto the kitchen counter, stirring my tea and knowing that Edward would text me back as soon as he wasn't busy. I was a little surprised when the phone buzzed almost immediately, because I knew that he was supposed to be at work that night. I flipped the phone open, a smile quirking my lips.

_No, can't say I knew that. Gross._

I had to smile. Edward had to be the only guy on the planet that wouldn't have made the typical remark over the desirability of teenage girls to middle-aged men.

_You're so perfect for me._

I could perfectly envision the quirk of his eyebrow going up over that one. I wasn't disappointed.

_Why's that?_

I grinned to myself as I hopped up to sit on the counter.

_Because you may be a pervy male, but you're MY pervy male. _

I bit my lip a little, almost throwing myself into giggles imagining the look on his face. His answer this time took a little longer, and it was almost as if I could see a gigantic "…" over his head.

_Should I be insulted?_

I really did laugh out loud at that one, and put the phone down to sip my tea. I knew that I shouldn't be bothering him at work anyways, so I decided to leave it well enough alone for just then.

**Twenty years old**

_I walked through Edward's front door – without knocking, of course – and made my way back to the kitchen. I could hear various sounds of revelry from the poker game that had already started, and my hands itched to get on the cards._

'_Don't you mean 'get on Edward'?' My suspiciously seventeen year old sounding thoughts whispered to me. Bad Bella!_

_Edward jumped up from the table the moment he saw me, and grasped me in a tight hug that made me laugh. _

"_Need to breathe some time, Edward…" He loosened his grip on me a tiny bit. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a young blond thing narrow her eyes at us._

"_Right, sorry." He threw my beloved crooked grin at me, and all was forgiven… as usual. _

"_Who's your friend, Edward?" The blond whined at him in a high pitch. She had the kind of voice that was sugar-coated poison, I could hear that right away. He shot her a slightly confused glance, as if even his thick male mind had picked up on the hidden tones._

"_Oh, um, Bells, this is Tanya. Tanya, this is Bella, my best friend." The frown on the girl's heavily made-up face got a little deeper. _

"_Oh. That girl you're always talking about." Now I could definitely tell that I had been right from the first. This girl hated my guts, and hated them well. I felt my own eyes narrow, even as I tried to maintain a friendly expression. She had designs on MY Edward. A clamour from the direction of the front hallway brought my head around._

"_Ryan?" I gasped in shock. I hadn't seen him in almost a year! He grinned at me and gave me a big hug, while a perky brunette waved at me from behind him._

"_Bells, this is my girlfriend, Amber." I smiled at the girl, instantly liking the vibes coming off of her. Even though we were strangers, she grabbed me into a tight hug to say hello. She introduced herself with a radiant smile, but the next moment her eyes slid to something over my shoulder. _

"_Ugh… What is that useless bitch doing here?" Raising a brow at the sudden vindictiveness coming from Amber, I turned to see who she was looking at. Spotting Tanya seemingly doing her utmost to crawl into Edward's lap, I could sense that Amber's look of disgust mirrored my own. _

_Oh yes, Amber and I were going to be good friends._

**Present Day**

I tried not to stare at Edward's delectable ass as he bent over the pool table to line up his shot… I really did. Redirecting my gaze to my glass of water, I felt a stirring of sadness. It was my last night in town from my study week, and tomorrow I was going to have to go back to school.

The week home had been a nice break, that was true, but I felt like I hadn't spent nearly as much time with Edward as I wanted to. Between having to visit around to the various criminals known as my family for Thanksgiving, as well as Edward's hectic work schedule, I felt almost as though I'd barely seen him.

When he'd called and suggested a night out at the pool hall with Ryan and Amber, I leapt at the chance. I had to be up insanely early the next morning for my return up north, but… what the hell. You only live once, right?

We were playing on teams, Edward and I matched against Ryan and Amber, of course. Needless to say, Edward and I were kicking ass and taking names. Don't get me wrong, I like pool. But, I knew that all the skills were coming directly out of him. Really, it was just that having Edward on my team made me _look_ good.

After he was done, Edward came to stand beside me to watch Ryan line up his shot. I tilted my head to rest it on his shoulder, and felt his lips brush across my temple. _God, I miss this already, and I'm not even gone yet. _

After a few more rounds, and a lot of sexual innuendos being passed around, Amber nudged me in my side.

"I gotta go to the bathroom. Do the girl thing and come with?" I nodded my head. The pool hall was a fun place to hang, but definitely had its share of questionable characters. I didn't really want Amber to be going into the bathroom by herself, anyways.

While she was busy, I sat myself on top of the counter and let out a low chuckle.

"You know, I think I just solved the mystery of why girls always go to the bathroom in packs. 'Cause then we can keep an eye on each other in case some men get any ideas." I could hear her laugh a little as the door swung open and she came out.

"You're probably right." After washing her hands, she hopped up on the counter to sit beside me. Her grin was devilish as she pulled a bottle of vodka out of her large purse, and twitched her eyebrows at me in a leering way. I had to laugh at her antics, but passed on the alcohol. She shrugged as if to say _Okay, whatever_, before taking a healthy swig herself.

"So, Ryan and I think that you're gonna marry Edward one day." The comment startled me, to say the least, for its abruptness. My brow rose as I turned to look at her. "Well, you guys _are_ like, disgustingly perfect for each other." I frowned a little, though it was nice to hear.

"What do you mean?" She rolled her eyes at me, and took another swig from her bottle.

"You guys just seem like you… compliment each other, I guess. Like you fill what's missing in him. And, I mean, you _have_ been together forever… Doesn't matter if most of it was just as friends. Like, you guys can have this whole conversation without even really talking at all. You can like, exist in your own little world where it's just the two of you. That's insanely cool."

It may have been a decidedly ineloquent speech, but Amber's words touched me all the same. It was for all those reasons that Edward and I _were_ best friends, never mind the 'more' that we had recently found.

Because he filled what was missing in me too. He always had.

* * *

**A/N: Here you go guys, I'm so glad that you haven't given up on me yet! School work has pretty much been kicking my ass for the last month. My friend Amber's little speech was too funny, I just had to put it in the story. I'm pretty sure that it was mostly vodka-induced.  
**

**Thanks so much for all the kind comments on the last chapter, in particular to iole01. The reassurance that there was no pressure for me to pump out another chapter until I felt ready was of great comfort to me. **

**As usual, please leave me some reviews! I really treasure the comments that you guys leave me.  
**


	19. A Sinking Feeling

I sighed heavily as I lightly tossed the book I was reading onto the desk. There were only two weeks left until I could go home for my winter break, and they were dragging on me horribly. All I wanted to do was go home and see Edward and my family, and because of that it was making it very difficult for me to concentrate on my schoolwork.

I rubbed a hand across my tired eyes, and leaned back further in my chair. Alice was out that night at a birthday party for one of her friends, and it was quiet without her there. She had offered for me to join them, but I'd known that there was still too much work for me to finish up. Besides, I was glad that she was getting out and socializing with people again. Things had been really difficult for her since her mother's death, and I was happy that she seemed to be dealing with everything better now.

The house phone ringing jarred me sharply out of my thoughts, and I jumped slightly in the chair. Laughing at myself for how easily I had been startled, I walked out to the hall to grab the extension. Glancing at the caller ID, it came up as 'unknown'. _Probably a telemarketer…_

"Hello?" There was silence on the other end of the line, so I tried again. "…Hello?" Still, there was only silence. I sighed. "Okay… goodbye." I hung up the phone, and turned around to go back to my desk and try to force myself into getting more work done. It was hard to make myself stick to it, without Alice here to kick my ass into staying on task. Just as I had turned, the phone rang again. Rolling my eyes to myself, I checked the caller ID, which yet again came up as 'unknown'.

"Hello?" There was a moment of silence, before the line crackled and I began to hear voices. Frowning to myself, I tried to figure out who the hell it was.

"…Bells?" One of my brows raised. It was difficult to hear, but the voice sounded like Alice's.

"Alice?"

"Yeah, it's me." I frowned a little again.

"Why'd it come up as 'unknown'?" If she was calling from her cell phone, the caller ID should have said that. There was some more crackling on the line before I could hear her again.

"…battery died. I borrowed Aaren's cell, but it's a piece of junk. I can hardly hear you! Just wanted to let you know that I'm going to stay here overnight." I rolled my eyes. Alice's battery was almost always dead or on the verge of death.

"Okay, have fun. Hey… did you try calling here a minute ago?"

"No... why?" I got an odd feeling in my stomach, but mentally shrugged it off.

"Got a call that didn't connect, so I thought maybe it was you trying to get through. Oh well, nevermind." I said goodnight to her, then hung up. I glanced around the empty apartment, and it felt like the walls were closing in on me.

_Screw this… I'm going out for coffee._

**Twenty years old**

_Alice walked into my bedroom, and I could tell immediately that something was bothering her. It didn't seem like something simple, either… The look on her face was almost like dread._

"_What's the matter?" Already, I was getting a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Her expression was grim._

"_I think there's something you need to see." She took my laptop from me, and started directing it toward a website. I was puzzled about what was so serious, until I began to read. Then that sinking feeling turned into a full-out ache. _

_It was an online journal of Jacob's. But that wasn't really what the problem was. The problem was what his latest entry said. _

**I do not know how to live without her… She loves another. Always has. And always will. She never was my own.**

_I read further down, hardly believing my eyes. _

**I tire of my own life… The terror of non-being seems pale compared to the horror of living. If only I could use the knife and set my spirit free to sail.**

_My brain was moving sluggishly about what it all meant as I continued to read the long entry, but one thing stood out in my mind: he was talking about Edward. I looked at Alice, her face was still grim and her eyes were sad. _

"_You know what this means, don't you?" I said to her. "The timing is too much of a coincidence. Yesterday I send you a message on Facebook about Edward, and today this comes up?" She nodded her head. "But what I don't get is how he saw it… I have him blocked, and I changed all my passwords after I broke up with him…" We both puzzled it over, until Alice's face registered comprehension and shock. _

"_I think I know!" I tilted my head questioningly. "He knew my password for my Facebook when he lived here with us… If he signed in as me, then he would have been able to see your profile!" _

_It made sense. A sick feeling of rage began to bubble within me, and I felt like I had been violated in some way. In one of those rare examples of uncanny coincidence, my cell phone rang and showed Jacob's number. _

"_What the fuck do you want." I bit out. There was silence for a moment on the other end of the line, before he answered._

"_What's with the attitude, Bella? What the hell?"_

"_Don't even try to give me that injured tone, Jacob! I know what you did! You hacked into Alice's Facebook to spy on me!" I was screaming at him with all the rage locked inside my body. _

"…_So what if I did? You never tell me anything anymore! I just wanted to know what was going on with you, but you blocked me! And it's a good thing I did look, otherwise I would have never known about this sick love you have for your 'best friend'! How long has that been going on?! You were fucking him behind my back, weren't you?!"_

"_Don't even try to turn this around on me! Not only did you invade my privacy, but Alice's too by using her profile! This is fucking STALKER behaviour, Jacob! Stay the fuck away from me, or I'm throwing a restraining order on your ass!"_

**Present Day**

I sighed a little as I sat down at the small table in the café. I breathed in the wonderful scent of their hot chocolate as I let my mind wander away from all of the school work I was neglecting at home. _Fuck it… Everyone needs a break once in awhile, or they'll go crazy_.

I leaned the book that I'd brought with me onto the table, and relaxed back into the plush seat. Okay, so maybe I was a little old to be reading a love story about vampires, but who cares what everyone else thinks?

I had become completely engrossed in the tale in no time, so it was a bit of a surprise when my cell phone rang. Seeing that it was Heather, I smiled as I answered.

"Hello, sweet pea. What are you up to?" I could hear the smile in her voice as she chatted away about how school was going for her, and how excited she was for me to come home for the winter break. I couldn't help but smile when she told me that she missed me, because Heather could always cheer me up when I was at my worst.

"So…" She said after a small but comfortable silence. "How are things going with you and the hottest fireman on the planet?" I could perfectly envision the spark of mischief that would be in her eyes. I laughed a little, and couldn't help but picture Edward in my mind's eye.

"Thing's are going amazingly well. Almost too perfect, to be honest."

"What do you mean?" I laughed again.

"D'you know, we've been dating for almost six months now, and we haven't fought even once? Is that normal?" She chuckled a little at that.

"First of all, not fighting is a good thing. And, you guys know and understand each other so well, that there aren't really any miscommunications for you to fight over. Second of all… you guys weren't built for normal. You're both a little on the odd side, and that's exactly how I love you!"

"I love you too, darling."

"Ugh… when are you coming home? I need my Bella. I miss you." A soft smile slipped onto my face, and I got all warm and fuzzy on the inside. It was always so nice to feel needed.

"Two weeks, my dear." I sighed. "A very slow-moving two weeks." I could hear her echo my sigh on the other end of the line.

"Tell me about it." After a bit more chatting and catching up, she said goodbye and hung up. Glancing at the time on the cell phone, I noticed that it was getting fairly late, and decided to head back home.

Already outside it was pitch dark, and I felt a bit of a chill run down my spine as I walked. The café was only a fifteen minute walk down the street from the apartment, but our building wasn't in the most glamorous end of town. I rubbed a hand across the back of my neck to try and dispel the feeling of eyes watching me, and tried to tell myself to get a hold of my imagination.

If I was going to be all alone at the apartment that night, then letting myself get spooked would not lead to a restful evening.

* * *

**A/N: I'm trying to get my updates a little more regular for you guys, so bear with me! I can't believe that I'm already almost at 20 chapters on this one... I never thought that it would be a long story, but there's just so much to write about! **

**I know that I haven't really had any Edward-Bella smexiness for you guys in a while, but I'll try to add a little into the next chapter when she's home for winter break! ;)**

**Please, leave me some more reviews! You guys always make my day with the comments that you leave for me. 3  
**


	20. A Glimpse of Eternity?

The bus finally pulled in after what felt like the longest four hour bus ride in existence. I breathed a small sigh of relief as I spotted Esme's car waiting just down the street from the bus terminal for me. Somehow finding the strength in my weary body to lug my bag off the bus, I couldn't help but smile when I saw how excited she was to see me.

The ride to Edward's house was a cheerful one, with Esme gladly chatting away and filling the silence. She seemed to know that I was tired and in more of a 'listening' than 'talking' mood.

"I'm so glad that you're home to visit once again, dear. I know the boys are all really looking forward to it." I smiled at Esme, and relaxed back into the car's passenger seat.

* * *

I was a little disappointed that Edward wasn't there when we arrived, but I understood that he had to be at work. In a lot of ways, I knew that I had to come second to his job, because it was so important.

Esme had noticed how worn out I was after the long bus trip, and had ordered me in her motherly way to go up to Edward's room and take a nap. So, I chucked my bag onto the floor and gleefully stripped off my clothes to pull on one of Edward's big t-shirts, then climbed into the bed. _This is home_.

I breathed in deeply to catch the faint scent of him that lingered on the sheets, and smiled as I drifted off to sleep.

What felt like only a few seconds later – but must have been a few hours – I awoke to the feeling of rough palms smoothing over the skin of my thigh, and a gentle kiss being placed upon the side of my neck. I smiled, without opening my eyes.

"I'd be quite happy if you'd wake me up like that every day…" I rolled over in the bed, cuddling against the familiar large frame and resting my head in the hollow of his shoulder. I could feel his body vibrate with a chuckle before he spoke.

"I'd love to promise you that, Bells, but somehow I get the feeling that I won't be able to keep it." I had missed him so much while at school that it hurt. Nothing could compare to the happiness that I felt just being beside him once again. _And if that wasn't sweet enough to rot your teeth…_ I told my inner voice to shut the hell up and stop trying to ruin my happy moment.

"I guess I'll settle for every once and a while, then."

"That I can promise." We laid together silently for a few moments, just enjoying being together once again. Eventually, I could feel him shift his head to look at something.

"You know…" I could hear the reverberation of his deep voice through his chest. "We still have an hour until Mom will have dinner ready…" I opened my eyes to see a devilish grin flash across his gorgeous face. Before I could completely take in what he was up to, Edward had flipped me over on the bed so that he hovered above me. Blinking in surprise, I didn't even have enough time to speak before his lips came crashing onto mine.

One of his hands wove into my hair, tangling in it and holding me where he wanted me. I gripped his upper arm, and heard him groan as my nails dug in out of reaction. Smiling against his lips, I grasped the hem of the t-shirt he was wearing and began to slowly raise it. Impatient with my slowness, he seized the shirt and whipped it over his head, throwing it to the floor. I laughed a little at the action, but the laughter slowly died when I saw the hot look in his eyes…

It was then that my teasing turned into pure, unadulterated need.

_**Twelve years old**_

_I was hanging upside down off the old, broken arm chair in the basement, watching as Edward threw darts at the board attached to the wall. I was a little bored, but didn't want to say anything because I was afraid he'd leave. I saw him glance at me out of the corner of his eye._

"_You know," he said while lining up a shot. "when you hang like that, you're hair looks like a waterfall." I smiled a little at the visual. He threw the dart, but instead of making another shot, knelt down in front of where I was. Sending him a quizzical glance, I waited for him to say what was on his mind. _

"_Bella... Can I have a kiss?" I sat up, and felt all the blood rush from my head at the motion. The first time Edward had kissed me had been a few months earlier, at the lake. I smiled at him a little shyly. _

"'_Course you can." We had kissed a few times since then, quick little pecks against each others' lips. Edward's face blushed violently, and he grabbed a nearby blanket. He drew it up over us, and I wondered what he was doing. _

_In the darkness, I couldn't see him very well at all, and put out a hand to try to find him. My fingers brushed his shoulder, and I gripped the material of his t-shirt. _

"_Whatcha doing, Edward?" I didn't get an answer from him, probably because he felt embarrassed about something. I could feel his hot breath brush my cheek, and a fluttery feeling in my stomach began. _

_His lips brushed mine, just like always, but then pressed more firmly to me. This was a whole new kind of kiss… My fingers stayed tangled in his t-shirt, and the fluttery feeling in my stomach increased. But then… there was light. Cool air brushed our faces as the blanket disappeared from over us, and we jerked quickly apart from each other. I looked up to find my mother glaring down at me. _

"_Bella Marie Swan, you get upstairs right this instant!" She turned and stomped upstairs, and dread washed over me. I looked at Edward, and he looked like he was on the verge of crying._

"_I'm sorry…" He said with a quiver in his voice. I was yelled and screamed at by my parents for a while, but it didn't bother me too much. My mind raced in confusion over what had happened in the basement. _

_It was the next week when Edward told me he didn't want to be my boyfriend anymore, because he would only get me in trouble. From there on, he said he only wanted to be my best friend._

_**Present Day**_

Edward and I were laying together, much as we had when he'd first woken me up… Except this time we were minus clothing and over-heated from our 'reunion'. I smiled at him mischievously and he raised a brow as if to ask what I was up to.

I grabbed the thin sheet that laid over us, and drew it up to cover our heads. The dimming sunlight from the window filtered through the sheet, so that I could still see his face. I could see the spark of recognition enter his eyes, just before I lowered my head to place a kiss upon his lips.

As I raised my head, my ever-growing hair slid over my shoulder to hang down and pool on the pillow beside his head. Tangling his fingers in my hair, he smiled at me.

"It still looks like a waterfall." I felt like my heart would burst from all the happiness locked inside of it. Throwing the sheet off of us, I sat up quickly.

"Okay, that's it." He frowned up at me sitting on top of him, confused as to what I was talking about. "I'm giving you your Christmas present now." He threw me my crooked grin.

"Bells, it's not Christmas yet."

"I don't care. I can't wait." I jumped up and started rifling through my bag to get his present, oblivious to the fact that I still didn't have a stitch of clothing on. When I turned back to him, he was sitting with his back propped against the wall, a small box cradled in one of his large hands.

"Okay," he laughed. "but I get to give you your present first." It took me a minute to answer, because I was too distracted by all the glistening male chest in front of me. _Apparently actually having Edward now doesn't change the fact that my hormones are still that of a teenager… In fact, it's probably making them worse. _

"Alright. Who are we kidding? I love presents." I gleefully jumped back into bed with him, and tucked the sheet up under my arms so that it was covering me. Even though we were alone in his room, I still felt a little self-conscious. He handed me the little box with a soft smile on his face, and I could feel my heart begin to thump crazily.

Nestled inside it was a beautiful ring. I recognized it immediately as one that I had seen when out with Edward months before, when he had still been dating Tanya. I had remarked on how cute it was, but hadn't thought that he would have remembered something like that. I could feel my eyes begin to tear up, and felt silly.

Edward pulled the band out of its box, and grasped my left hand. Sliding it onto my ring finger, he looked seriously into my eyes.

"Someday soon, I'm gonna buy you a diamond ring… And then I'm gonna marry you. Until that day, this one's to keep its place."

I cried.

I couldn't help it, the tears began to fall. It was all I had ever wanted, was to hear those kind of words from him. Before I had always thought that it would be enough to stay by his side as his best friend, but now that wasn't enough. Edward would always be my best friend, but I couldn't live without him like this anymore. I needed him.

He smiled and called me silly, and used his thumbs to wipe away my tears. I got myself together enough to hold out my present for him, and watched the awed look on his face as he opened it. Inside sat a thick, heavy band of a man's ring, and a lopsided smile graced his face.

"Great minds think alike, huh?"

"I guess so…" I plucked the ring out of its box, much as he had done, and slid it onto the ring finger of his left hand. It suited him well, that tough-looking ring. And I had made sure that it was made out of a material that would be safe for him to wear to work.

He pulled me into his lap, my back pressed to his chest, and twined our fingers together. Looking down, I could see both our rings side-by-side. Now there was a beautiful sight. Our moment was interrupted when Emmett's voice boomed up the stairs.

"DINNER!!!!!"

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**A/N: Did you all think I had forgotten about you? Well, the answer is 'no'! I've been so busy this school writing my two theses, it's been insane! But, school's almost over and I should be able to get back to writing on schedule. I meant to get this chapter written back at the Winter Break, but it just didn't happen. Hence why I'm writing about Christmas in April. **

**I hope this chapter satisfied everyone's need for some good old-fashioned Bella and Edward fluffiness. Please, keep leaving me those fantastic reviews! (and I love you all for your patience for this chapter!) 3  
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	21. Don't Ever Leave

I was finally home. School was over, and never again would I have to leave Edward behind to go back up north. _Can't ask for anything more._

I glanced down at the ring on my finger, a secretive smile in place. I was going over to see him tonight, and I couldn't have been any happier. It had been awhile since I had seen him, because I'd had to arrange the move from up north back to my place in town, and I had missed him so much.

I parked the car on the side of the road out front of the Cullen house, and paused long enough to grab my cell phone from the dash. I had gotten a text earlier, a simple _I need you_, and knew that I was going to put everything else aside to go to him that night. Sliding out from the car, I couldn't help the happy smile that appeared at even just the sight of his house.

"Bella…" I paused in my walk across his front yard, sure that I had just heard my name. A chill quaked its way down my spine, and I began to feel uneasy. _What the hell?_ Telling myself that I was hearing things, I quickened my pace nonetheless to reach the front door faster. I slipped inside, and made sure to latch the door behind me. Staring through the glass, I swallowed hard as I tried to see if there was any movement outside. When there was none, I shook myself a little and toed off my shoes.

I could hear the _click, click_ of billiard balls hitting each other, and knew that Edward must be playing pool downstairs. I crept my way down the stairs, wanting to surprise him. He was bent over the table, concentrating on a shot, and wearing nothing but a pair of thin grey sweatpants. _Thank you, God._ I knew that I'd never figure out how I had gotten so lucky as to land such an attractive guy.

I finished coming down the stairs, and knew that he had spotted me out of the corner of his eye. Making his shot, he came around the table behind me and wrapped an arm around my waist. He placed a kiss on my shoulder, and just held me to him in silence for a few moments.

"What's wrong, love?" I whispered. There was no need to whisper, really, but the moment just seemed to call for it. I felt his arm squeeze me even tighter, before letting me go.

"I just missed you, that's all." I could tell that something else was bothering him. Giving him an _I don't believe you_ look, I waited for the whole truth. He sighed, and ran a hand through his hair. "It was… a rough day. Young guy was at work, an electrical fire broke out at his house. We got the blaze out, but his pregnant wife had been trapped inside…" I could see the sadness in his gorgeous eyes, and knew immediately that Edward had been the one to find the poor woman's body. I wrapped my arms around his waist, and felt him rest his chin on the top of my head. _Tall bastard._

After a few silent moments, he let me go to start collecting the billiard balls to rack them for us to play a game. He still wore a troubled look on his face, and I waited for him to speak. I knew my Edward, so I knew that he was thinking through how to express to me what he was feeling. I gave him the time he needed to come up with the words.

"I just…" I waited patiently as he paused and lapsed into momentary silence once again. "If it was… If that had been you. I couldn't live." His expression when he looked up at me was bleak. "I can't live without you anymore, Bells. I wouldn't know how." I felt torn; on the one hand, my heart ached for him and what his job forced him into experiencing, but on the other hand, a part of me was happy that he felt that strongly about us and what we now had together.

I slowly walked over to where he was now staring intently down at the pool table, and grasped his chin to turn his face up to me. I smiled a little, and looked into his eyes so that he would know that what I was about to say to him was the absolute truth.

"There is nothing, I repeat, _nothing_ on this earth that would dare to take me away from you. No matter what happens, I really believe that we're always going to have each other." I knew that Edward didn't know whether he really believed in God or not, but I fully believed that _something_ out there had to be watching over us. Why else, after all these years of aching for him, would I suddenly be given such happiness?

He smiled at me, but I could see in his eyes that he was unsure of whether or not to believe me. With that, we began our game and turned the conversation to lighter topics.

_**Unknown Time  
**_

_I raced through the empty building, my heart pounding within my chest. The fear was gripping me, making my hands shake and a cold sweat break out on my body. _

_I ran from room to room, feeling more desperate as each second ticked by. I had to find who I was looking for. And I had to find them soon, before it was too late. Time was running out. _

_I rounded a corner too fast, and slammed my shoulder up against the wall. Clenching my teeth against the pain, I made myself continue on. I had to find them. I had to find them. Time was ticking by. I had to find them. _

_Up ahead of me, I spotted an old wooden staircase that led both up and a down a floor. I hesitated. Up or down? It was then that I smelled burning. Almost simultaneously, flames appeared on both the lower and upper levels. I had to make a decision. Up or down?_

_I raced up the stairs, even though I knew it was the more dangerous option. I could smell the smoke before I saw it, and as it became thicker I was forced to slow down. At the end of the hallway, I found a door that was locked. Instinctively, I knew that the person I was searching for was in there. _

_I slammed my already hurt shoulder up against the door, trying to break it open. I could feel the heat sinking through the wood, and tried to hold the despair at bay. I punched the wood of the door, and winced as the thick ring on my finger pinched my skin. The sight of the ring, and the thought of the night that it had been given to me, steeled my resolve. _

_I kicked the door with all my might, and watched as it crashed inwards. Flames jumped about the room, and the heat was intense. I could see a slim arm, lifeless on the floor, from behind an old armchair that was on its side. _

"_Bella!" I screamed, as I raced to her side._

_**Present Day**_

I sat up in bed, breathing erratically and trying to calm my pounding heart. My body was covered in a sheen of sweat, and I swore that I could still smell the scent of burning wood. I felt Edward shift into wakefulness beside me, and it wasn't long before his sleepy brain registered that something was wrong. _What the hell was that?_ I was still trying to make sense of it. _Nightmare?_

"Bells?" Edward mumbled sleepily, as he sat up. He brushed the strands of my hair sticking to my face out of the way, and peered at me with concern. "What's wrong, baby?" I steadied my breathing, and tried to smile at him. It was forced, and he knew it.

"Just a bad dream…" My voice sounded breathless, even to me. He gazed at me with concern, and pulled me back down to lie beside him. Cradled in his arms, I tried to calm myself down while my mind buzzed with images from the nightmare. I had been Edward in the nightmare. I knew that because I had seen his ring when I had looked down at 'my' hand. _How strange…_

I made myself concentrate instead on the feeling of Edward's fingers shifting through my hair, and it was in this way that I eventually fell back asleep.

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By the next morning, the nightmare was a hazy memory to me. Edward and I made our traditional pancakes for breakfast, and spent his rare day off watching movies and just relaxing. Emmett and Jasper came and went throughout the day, stopping in to chat for a few minutes every once and awhile, but mostly just running off to their own plans.

By the time it was once again pitch-dark out, all I wanted to do was spend another night there with him. It was getting harder and harder to leave him and go home to my own place. But, there were things that I needed to do there, so I would have to put off my next night over until a different day.

Giving him a slightly sad kiss goodnight, I headed out to my car as I heard Jazz call for his attention. It was just as Edward turned away from the door that I felt a strong hand clamp over my mouth, and something prick into my neck.

The last thing I saw before it all went dark was the sight of Edward smiling at his youngest brother through the door's window, completely unaware that something was wrong outside in the blackness of the night.

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**A/N: A sincere thanks to any of you guys that are still sticking with this story. I'm thinking this baby's only got another few chapters left on her, and then I'm going to be wrapping it up. I don't want this to drag on too long. **

**It was all the lovely Heather's idea to have Bella dream in Edward's perspective. Hope you guys enjoyed that! Since I was planning on adding that in, I decided to skip the flashback on this chapter. **

**As per usual, leave me some reviews, guys! I really want to know what you think about how this story is going.  
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	22. An Exorcism of You

**A/N: Just as a warning, there is some violence in this chapter. For those of you sensitive to that, I suggest you skip it.**

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My head was pounding when I awoke. I felt as though the world was swimming around me, and for the first few moments of consciousness, I couldn't remember how to make my mouth form words. Blinking to try and clear my hazy eyes, I glanced around me without moving my aching head.

From what I could see, the room was old and most likely abandoned. The walls were coated in water marks dripping from the ceiling, and the faded carpet under me smelled musty with age. I slowly moved my head, and caught a glimpse of broken down and outdated furniture in front of me. It was when I went to push myself up into a sitting position that I discovered that my hands were tied in front of me.

"Well, well. The sleeping bitch awakes." The unexpected voice stopped my movement. _What the fuck? It can't be…_ Using an elbow to push me away from the floor, I propped myself up against the side of a tattered arm chair. Blinking to clear my eyes once again, I tried to force my sluggish brain to comprehend what was going on around me. I looked to the source of the voice, hardly believing who I saw sitting in front of me.

"Tanya…" I croaked out of a surprisingly sore throat. An evil little smirk crossed her lips, and a complete and utter loathing for her filled me. She gracefully rose from where she had been perched on the arm of a filthy sofa, and crouched down until she was eye-level with me. Putting on a fake look of concern, she ran a sharp nail down the side of my face.

"What's the matter, hun? Feeling a little under the weather?" She cackled to herself, impressed with her dominant position over me. "I'm going to enjoy this…" A pout worked its way onto her face, while I forced myself to look her in the eyes. _I will NOT give her the satisfaction of looking frightened._ "This is what you get, you slut. This is what you get for stealing him away from me!" I smirked in her face, appearing unconcerned over my position while I secretly quaked inside.

"I didn't steal anything. I didn't _have_ to." I reminded her. "It's not my fault that he woke up to what a manipulative little bitch you are, and booted your skanky ass out the door." I expected the sharp slap when it came. The force of it knocked my head to the side, and I could feel my teeth cut open the inside of my cheek from it.

"Screw you, Bella! He's mine!" She looked on the verge of angry tears, her face becoming almost purple in rage. I had a perverse wish to push her farther over the edge, as stupid as it might be. I indulged that urge. Maintaining eye-contact with her, I spit a mouthful of blood onto the front of her expensive white halter top. The look on her face bordered somewhere between disgust and murderous fury, and she swung a hand back to strike me again, this time with her fingers curled into dangerous claws.

I watched, unblinking, refusing to cower from her. Before her blow could land, her wrist was caught in a strong grip. I glanced up to see Jacob glaring down at her. _I knew you were involved in this._ He flung her away from me, and seeing her land so inelegantly on her ass gave me a fleeting feeling of satisfaction. She glared at him, and marched out the door on the other side of the room in fury.

As Jacob turned his attention to me, I had to forcibly stop myself from cringing. From Tanya, there was no real danger. She was too small, to pathetic. But from Jacob… I knew that he had every intention of killing me. The gleam in his eyes made my stomach flip crazily. _Not just me… He has every intention of killing Edward as well._ I concentrated on keeping my breathing even as my mind reeled. I had to find a way out of this… A way that didn't involve Edward.

"What do you want?" I bit the words out hard, trying not to look like I was afraid. He smirked at me, and swaggered over to where I was still propped against the chair. He mimicked Tanya's earlier pose, crouched down in front of where I sat with his face only inches away from mine.

"You." He answered me. "Your life. _His _life. And I want to watch the anguish on his face when he realizes that he's too late. Your perfect little hero isn't going to be able to save you." He spat the words out, the vindictiveness behind them contorting his face into something monstrous and evil. _What had I ever seen in this lunatic?_

"I suppose you knew my movements because _she_ helped you." The words were weary. I gave every indication that I had resigned myself to the role of damsel in distress, while my mind buzzed with ways to save myself. He smirked, thinking he had won.

"Of course. She was so eager for you to be out of the picture so she could have her wonderful boyfriend back. Needless to say, I didn't let her in on the fact that he won't make it through tonight either." He chuckled to himself, and the sound sent chills up and down my spine. _How is it possible for someone to hide this kind of insanity for so long?_

He rose from his crouched position, and strolled over to a worn-down table that stood drunkenly beside the stained sofa. Picking up a piece of paper, he pulled out a cell phone and started to dial whatever number was written on the paper. I got a bad feeling in my gut.

"Well hello, Hero." He drawled out. _No… Please, no._ "Do you remember me? I have somebody who wants to talk to you." I mentally rolled my eyes. _Could you BE anymore cliché, asswipe?_ He strolled over to me and crouched down once again. "Say hello, Bella." I refused. I kept my mouth shut, and glared at Jacob with all the hatred that was stored inside of me.

Anger swept across his face when I wouldn't cooperate, and he back-handed me across my already torn cheek. I couldn't help the yelp of pain that came out of me, and I could hear Edward frantically call my name over the cell phone. Jacob raised it to his ear once again, smirking down at me. I spit another mouthful of blood onto the dirty carpet while Jacob told Edward the address of the building where we apparently were, ending with a taunt to come quickly before I wasn't alive enough to be saved.

"I hope you rot in the hell you're headed to." I grit out between my clenched teeth. The side of my face was throbbing, and I knew that I was already developing one hell of a bruise. Jacob completely ignored that, and strolled over to the door.

"Excuse me while I prepare a little welcome for your Hero." He taunted before sliding out the door. I could only imagine what he was 'preparing'. _I have to get out of here before Edward comes… Before he's in danger too._ I glanced down at my hands, and studied the knots in the rope that bound me. I was tempted to snort in disgust._ So amateur. Edward's knots were way harder than this_.

It was only a matter of seconds before I had the rope undone and in a puddle on the floor. I silently thanked whoever I needed to thank for the fact that Edward and I had played such strange games when we were younger, otherwise it might have taken me hours to work myself free.

I rushed to the dingy window, tugging on its firm weight to try and raise it. It held fast, and I knew that I'd never get it open. I spun to glance around the room, looking for anything possible to use to break it instead. I had to get out of there before Edward put himself in danger. There was no doubt in my mind that Edward would come for me.

Edward had always been there to save me. _Always_.

_**Fourteen years old**_

"_Bells, seriously. Watch your step." I rolled my eyes at him, and kept on my course. Edward and I rarely got to be alone anymore, with Em and Jazz getting older and wanting to be around their big brother more often. Today they had gotten on my nerves a bit too much, and Edward and I had secretly taken off for the woods near his house. There was a canal that travelled amongst the trees back there, and it was a pretty sight. _

_Edward was a bit behind me, so I paused in my forward motion and turned around to watch him. My young heart thumped a little harder in my chest when I saw the way his t-shirt clung to muscles in his arms that I'd never noticed him having before. We were growing up, little by little, and changes like these were turning him from a skinny little boy into a stronger, more self-confidant man. Slowly. _

_In me, I hadn't changed much… Well, except for one area. __**That**__ rapidly-expanding area was gaining me a lot more looks from boys than I'd ever gotten, and to be honest it made me a bit uncomfortable. My t-shirts didn't fit the same anymore, and I didn't really like it._

_When Edward caught up to me, I couldn't help but smile at the exasperation in his beautiful eyes. I started backing up, keeping my eyes on his while forcing him to follow me._

"_Why are you so stubborn?" There was a twinkle of humour in his eyes, and that wonderful half-grin on his lips. I grinned back at him, while continuing my backward steps. _

"_Because I am my father's daughter?" It was something I had always heard my mother say about me. He laughed and shook his head._

"_And I wouldn't change a thing about you." He said. I felt all warm and fuzzy inside at that, the feeling distracting me from where I was going with my feet. I saw him glance just over my shoulder, a look of panic in his eyes._

_It was then that when I stepped back with my foot, there was no ground to meet it. I teetered backwards at the edge of the canal, a look of shock lighting on my face. The currant of the canal was swift today, and I could hear the water swooshing as I fell. Edward lunged forward, his right hand hooking onto the first thing he could grab, which happened to be the front of my pants. Fisting the fabric, he yanked me back towards him and away from the water. As my balance shifted from a backwards fall to a frontal one, I came sailing into his arms._

_His footing must have been firm, because he took the impact of my weight without falling over. I was squeezed up against him, and discovering that I quite enjoyed the feeling. Edward fisted one hand in the back of my shirt, lifting it a little, while his other hand gripped my hip strongly. He pressed his face into the curve of my neck, and I heard the panting breaths he took as he tried to calm himself down. His breath puffed against the exposed skin of my neck, and that fluttery feeling came back to my stomach. _

_His heart was beating fast and strongly as he calmed his fear. I knew this because I could feel its rapid thumping through where our chests were pressed so close together. I stayed still in his arms, unsure of what to do. The feelings coursing through me were so strange to me. Gradually, I relaxed the hands that had gripped tightly into the back of his t-shirt, and felt him do the same. He placed his hands on both my hips to gently push me away from him, only by a few inches._

"_I told you to watch your step…" He breathed trying to smile while his eyes still showed fear. The smile died after only a moment, and I felt his hands tighten where they still grasped my hips. "Don't ever do that to me again." He insisted quietly, before turning around to lead the way back to his house._

_**Present Day**_

I had only managed to crack the window slightly with one of the old chairs when Jacob came back into the room. I saw the rage come over him as he realized that I was in the process of trying to escape. My mind blanked out, and I went on instinct. I threw the chair with all my might at him, trying only to slow him down as he came toward me. The chair broke into pieces against his shoulder, a few shards of wood slicing the skin of his neck and face.

He continued to come after me, practically growling in fury. I threw whatever I could get my hands on at him, but he just kept coming. He got close enough to tangle a fist in my hair, jerking my head roughly back and making me wince in pain.

"You. Fucking. BITCH!" He tossed me roughly across the room, my ribs colliding painfully with the side of the arm chair. The pain was excruciating, I could hardly breathe. _Don't give up now, Bella. Don't you dare give up._ I glared up at him as he knelt over me and fisted my hair again. Jerking my head up, he slammed it back down against the floor, _hard_.

The last thing my brain registered before I blacked out was the distant smell of wood smoke and Jacob's evil laughter.

* * *

I regained consciousness to a big hand roughly shaking my shoulder. Blinking my eyes blearily, I could feel an intense heat in the room and the smell of burning wood all around me. I pushed away from the figure beside me, the hazy part of my brain fearing that it was still Jacob in the room with me. I scrambled my way painfully across the room away from whoever it was, before I heard him speak.

"Bella! Bells, it's me!" _Edward?_ I blinked again rapidly, and his wonderful face swam into my view. _Oh, thank fucking Christ… It's Edward._ Then it occurred to me just why that _wasn't_ a good thing.

"No…" I moaned out, while clutching an arm around my ribs which hurt with every breath I took. Edward came closer to me, his hands hovering in the air. He obviously wanted to gather me to him, but hesitated to do so since I didn't seem quite right. The sight of him brought tears to my eyes. "I knew you'd come… You shouldn't have come! He's after you… He's gonna kill you…" Every breath was agony, but I was determined to get him away from me and to safety.

Edward clenched his teeth, and I could see a muscle tick in his jaw. He slowly approached me where I lay in pain on the floor, and gently took my face in between his hands. He brushed my matted hair out of my face, and rage lit his eyes as he beheld the dark bruise that I was sure was already on my cheek.

"Bells…" He breathed softly, stroking my face gently and trying to get me to listen to him. "We're getting out of here, the both of us. I promise." _He never makes a promise that he can't keep… _I shook my head at him, ignoring my inner voice.

"No… You have to go…" He sighed out a harsh breath as the temperature in the room hiked again, and a bead of sweat travelled down the side of his face.

"He's lit this whole building on fire, Bells. We've got to go. NOW." He grasped me under both of my arms, and lifted me to my feet as if I were a child. I cried out in pain from the jarring of my ribs, and I could see the agony on his face. "I know it hurts, baby… But you have to try."

I looked toward the only door in the room, just in time to see the old wooden staircase in the hall collapse under the flames. The situation felt hopeless, but I knew I couldn't give up. Edward let me go, and I stumbled my way to the cracked window.

"Here!" I called to him. "It's the only way left…" Edward came to the window to join me, and tried to force it to rise. I shook my head at him, and rested my weary body against the wall. "That won't work, I tried. Have to break it!" I found myself shouting over the roar of the flames that were steadily devouring the building around us. I saw Edward grit his teeth, and he turned to me with a dangerous look in his eyes.

"Cover yourself!" He yelled, before taking a few paces back from the window. Knowing what he was about to do, I covered my head with my arms and slid down the wall to the floor. Edward swung his leg up, and delivered a powerful kick to the window that completely shattered the glass. Raising myself back up, I noticed in panic that the addition of oxygen from outside was feeding the inferno and only causing the flames to come at us faster. "OUT!" Edward screamed at me.

I wiggled my way out of the broken window, shards of glass slicing through my clothes. I could see that the floor we had been on was the fourth from the ground, and significantly high up. There was no balcony, there was no fire escape ladder. Just brick wall that ended at hard, unyielding pavement. I turned my head back to Edward where he was framed in the window.

"There's no way!" I was desperate, and panic edged my voice. He glanced down the wall, a determined look coming to his face.

"Yes, there is." I shook my head at him. "Yes! Bella, we've climbed using smaller holds than these bricks. I know you can do it! Think back to rock climbing with me. Didn't we always have fun? We've climbed without ropes before. We can do it!" I was trying so hard not to burst into tears from the hopelessness of it all. Edward looked desperate.

"Bells… Please! We have no other choice! Be my brave girl…" It was that desperation that did me in. I placed a soft kiss against his lips, and began to precariously climb down the side of the brick wall. My rock climbing experience made it so that I could instinctively use such tiny holds, but the move was still risky. Edward climbed out the window above me, and began to descend as well.

If either of us slipped, that would be the end of us both.

_**To Be Concluded...**_

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**A/N: I'm finally done my degree! No more pencils, no more books... Wow, this chapter ended up WAY longer than I intended it to be. Bonus for you guys! I felt bad that I hadn't given a chapter to this story yet, so I made myself sit down and get to it today! Hope this had enough excitement and drama for you.**

**As I said just above, the next chapter of this story will be the last. I honestly never intended for this story to be so long, but it seemed to just beg for it. Thank you muchly to all who have stuck by this story for its entirety. I'll try my best to give you a satisfactory ending in the next chapter!**

**Please review for me! Love you all.  
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	23. Together for Eternity

As soon as I felt my feet hit the ground, the breath I hadn't realized I was holding rushed out of me. I backed away from the brick wall to give Edward room to come down, and my hands began to shake violently. I watched his feet also make it safely to the pavement, and the shaking progressed to my whole body. Edward rushed over to me, and wrapped me gently in his arms. I could tell that he wanted to squeeze me tighter to him, but he was trying to be careful of my injuries.

I glanced back up the wall to the window we had escaped from, and could see flames flickering within that dingy old room. _Is it over? Can we go home now?_ Edward must have been thinking the same thing as I was, because he pressed a kiss to my forehead and leaned away from me. I took a good look at him, and realized that whatever he had been through while I had been unconscious must have been awful. There were tears in his jeans and black t-shirt, and his face and arms were covered in soot and scratches. _He raced through a burning building… for me._

"Let's get out of here, Bells. I can hear the sirens coming; there must be police with them that we can talk to." I was just about to nod my head in agreement, when I happened to glance over his shoulder. Jacob was charging toward us, a wicked looking knife clutched in his hand and his face lit with rage.

My body moved on instinct alone; I gripped the front of Edward's shirt and used it to propel him out of the way. Edward stumbled to the side from my tugging, just as the knife slashed downwards. It missed its mark in Edward's back, and instead caught the side of my arm. I threw the weight of my body against Jacob's, temporarily throwing off his momentum and sending him backwards while Edward recovered from my manoeuvring. Jacob gripped my head by a hand fisted in my hair, and raised the knife above me.

"You bitch… you fucking bitch! You think you can ruin all my plans?" I resisted the urge to close my eyes as the knife came plunging down. Before its deadly tip could meet my chest, the momentum of the blade was abruptly halted. Edward's strong hand had gripped Jacob's wrist, and was straining with the effort to hold him back. Jacob tossed me to the side like a rag doll, more intent at that moment on trying to destroy Edward.

Jacob had always hated Edward; had always seen him as some kind of threat. It was no surprise to me that hurting Edward took priority in his mind over hurting me. My already abused ribs were aching, and I couldn't summon the strength to get up from the ground to help. I hated myself for this weakness, even though I knew Edward would never blame me.

I watched the battle of wills that was now laid out before me. Edward threw a nasty left hook to Jacob's face while his other hand still gripped his wrist to control the knife. I watched as Jacob's head snapped back with the force of the blow, but his grip on the weapon still didn't weaken. Jacob's other hand came up between their bodies and shoved Edward hard away from him, breaking his grip around his wrist. An evil smirk appeared on Jacob's face as his hand came free, and he slashed out at Edward's stumbling body with the knife.

Time itself stopped for me as the sharp blade slashed at Edward's throat. Jacob missed, but the down-swing of the knife tore across the front of Edward's shirt and I saw the red of blood begin to bloom. _Please, please, please… Don't be a deep cut._ Edward kicked out at Jacob's left knee, which crumpled his leg under him. As his body fell downward, Edward then brought his own leg up and kneed Jacob in the face. Even I winced as I head the cartilage in Jacob's nose crack. Edward then grabbed Jacob's wrist again, and wrenched it into an unnatural angle, sending the knife falling to the ground.

Without seeming to even look my way, Edward expertly kicked the blade directly to me and thereby far out of Jacob's reach. Jacob rose to his feet, and blood was dripping from his nose all over his face. _Ew…_ I looked over to Edward then. His face was stone cold with its mixture of rage and murderous intent, and it sent a chill down my spine. _I've never seen Edward this pissed off… Never._

"Edward!" I called to him. He didn't take his eyes off Jacob to turn my way, but I knew he was listening to me. "Don't kill him." I could see the struggle within his body. Because I knew my Edward, I knew what was going on in his head right now. He had always been raised with the belief that you never, _ever_, raised your hand to a woman. Under _any_ circumstances. He wanted to punish Jacob for not only having done that, but for having done it to _his _woman. At this moment, Edward wasn't thinking about laws or what he could get in trouble for. He was only thinking of revenge.

"Don't…" I repeated. I could sense that the reason and logic in his mind were trying to take control. "I refuse to come visit you in jail!" I yelled. A small smile tried to tug at the edges of his frowning mouth, and I new that reason had won the battle within him. He nodded tightly, acknowledging it to me.

"I won't kill him." He grit out from between clenched jaws. "But I'm still going to beat the living shit out of him." I looked back to Jacob, and recognized the mania inside of him. _He won't stop until he's either arrested or knocked unconscious._ I could hear those sirens getting steadily closer, and I prayed with everything in me that cops would be arriving soon.

"Be my guest." I said to Edward. I knew that it was necessary. Someone had to stop Jacob, or he would kill us both. Shock from the whole of the day was beginning to hit my body, and my shaking got worse. I started to feel cold all over, and I knew that if this wasn't ended soon I was going to be in big trouble.

Jacob rushed at Edward once again, his body pumped up on adrenaline and insanely strong for that reason. They punched each other back and forth, but Edward was clearly gaining the upper hand. Jacob's punches were becoming slower, missing their marks. Edward sent a forceful blow to Jacob's solar plexus, and he went down hard. Kneeling on the ground, he gasped for air as Edward tracked his every move with watchful eyes. As Jacob struggled to bring himself upright once more, a truck full of firefighters came squealing around the building. I unconsciously breathed out a sigh of relief. Firefighters meant help; firefighters meant cops weren't far behind. Edward raised a hand at one of the men when they recognized him.

"What's going on here, Ed?" The firefighter asked. His eyes roved over the scene, a grim look coming to the man's face as he apparently took in Edward's bloody knuckles, the soot on his face, the blood all over Jacob, and the knife still lying on the ground next to my own prone form. Edward's jaw clenched once again.

"Got some cops around front, Mac?" Edward asked. 'Mac' nodded. "Bring them 'round for me? This one needs a set of handcuffs." He nodded toward Jacob, where he was still kneeling and obviously starting to feel every one of his aches and pains from the fight. Mac nodded once again and glanced toward where I was lying.

"An ambulance too, Ed?" He asked. Edward nodded his head in agreement, and the firefighter went jogging away. Edward remained where he was, standing still and watching Jacob carefully to make sure he didn't try anything or go anywhere until the cops could deal with him. It felt like hours, but must have only been minutes, until Mac came back around the building with two policemen in tow. My heart leapt in relief as I recognized one of them as Heather's father, whom I obviously knew well. The two of them went about their usual cop procedure of putting Jacob in cuffs and collecting the knife from the ground beside me, before Heather's father came over.

"You alright, Bella?" He asked me with concern, before promising me that the ambulance was seconds away. I smiled at him, giddy on my relief that everything was over.

"Good to see you, PB." I said, using one of Heather's favourite pet names for her dad. He smiled at me reassuringly before going to check on the ambulance. I tried not to wince in pain as the paramedics loaded me onto the stretcher, and wheeled me up into the ambulance. Edward made to enter the back of the vehicle with me, but was stopped by the other cop's hand on his arm.

"We need to talk to you still." The policeman said. Edward glared at him until the cop let him go, and his response was curt.

"You can talk to me later. I'm going with her to the hospital." I knew he wasn't intending to be mean to the man. Edward was just worried sick about me, and wanted to keep an eye on me after everything we had just been through. The cop seemed to think it over, and finally relented when Heather's father motioned for him to come back.

Edward climbed into the back of the ambulance, and placed himself behind my head so that he was out of the paramedic's way. I tilted my head slightly so that I could see his face, and my heart ached at the sight. His poor face was scratched, bruised and covered in blood and soot. But worst of all of the expression that he wore. Edward was blaming himself for all that had happened. I could tell by the look of regret and self-recrimination that was clear as day to me.

"Stop." I said to him quietly. He blinked as if coming out of deep thoughts at the sound of my voice, and his eyes focused on mine. He knew what I was talking about, because he knew my mind so well. Instead of answering me, he just shook his head as if to say _We'll talk about this later_. He reached a hand up to stroke the side of my face gently, and I closed my eyes as the exhaustion overwhelmed me.

_**Six Months Later**_

"Seriously, Bella?" I watched as a look of disbelief and borderline disgust crossed Alice's face. "You are NOT wearing that out to dinner." I glanced down at my torn jeans and Metallica t-shirt.

"What's wrong with this?" It wasn't like we were going somewhere ritzy for dinner. Alice rolled her eyes at me, and began digging through the dark recesses of my closet. I turned as Heather giggled from her seat on my bed. I narrowed my eyes at her.

"And just _what_ is so funny, young lady?" Her face broke out into a beautiful smile, and I had to suppress my own grin. She laughed again before shooting me that I'm-so-innocent look that she had perfected. Alice resurfaced from my closet and laughed triumphantly.

"Oh, yes. You are _so_ wearing this!" I swallowed hard. _Oh lord… Here we go._ I began to back away from Alice and the hangar that she was brandishing like the most threatening of weapons. As I turned to make my escape from Bella-Barbie time, I discovered belatedly that somehow the door had been rigged to not open.

I suppose someone else would have found it funny how Alice and Heather both pounced on me to begin the torture of dressing me up 'pretty'.

* * *

I glanced at the table around me, and felt nothing but happiness and contentment. Out to dinner with me were Edward, his brothers and Esme, Heather, Alice and Rosalie, and my parents. _My family is all here. Life could not be better._ The restaurant's lighting was dim and intimate, and suited my quiet and restful mood. It had been Edward's idea, apparently, for us all to go out for dinner. And I had to agree that it was a brilliant idea, at that.

Alice and Heather had finally succeeded in dressing me up, but only a little. I now wore dark blue jeans – sans holes and tears – and a pretty black cotton top. The material was light and floated around me, which suited me just fine. Alice had scooped my hair up into some kind of complicated curly mass, but it did look good. Everyone else was similarly dressed in this nice-but-still-casual kind of theme, and I thought to myself that we had to do things like this more often.

Ever since _the incident_ six months ago, I had felt the need to surround myself with those most important to me. Coming so close to not only my own death but also Edward's had really shaken me. I wanted as much time with my family as possible; I wanted to experience as much of life as possible. I had spent a lot of time just after _the incident_ contemplating many different things, and I had come to some conclusions.

The first conclusion I had come to? Life can be far too short to continuously put off what you really want to do. If you always tell yourself 'later', you may never get the chance at all. So why wait? I think Edward had maybe felt this as well. We were already starting to save up for buying our own house together, and I was so tired of living without him. In the last few months, we had hardly slept apart; either I was sleeping over at the Cullen house, or he was spending the night at my place.

The second conclusion that I had come to was really a pretty basic one that I should have fully understood years ago. And that conclusion was that those people you come across in life will be varied, and treat you in different ways; but the ones that are really worth your time are those who love you for exactly who you are, no changes required. Jacob had always criticized me during our relationship; the way I acted, the music I listened to, what food I ate, the way I looked. Nothing had been good enough for him. Eventually, I had wised up to the fact that it wasn't worth changing myself to try and please him, and that's one reason why I had broken up with him back then.

Edward truly loved me just the way I was. He had seen me through all of my best and worst moments, and still loved me no matter what. He had seen me at my geekiest while describing to him the different types of funerary processes in ancient Egyptian culture and why they were so fascinating. He had seen me at my absolute bitchiest on several occasions when we were growing up, and now. He had seen me at my most broken during the funeral of Alice's mother, and had supported me silently through it all. He had seen me at my most frightened six months ago, when I had thought that he was about to be killed for loving me. He had seen me laugh, cry, scream, rage, and whimper. And he loved me still, no changes required. Just the same as I loved him.

It had bothered me immensely the way that Tanya had tried to change him when they were dating. But it had done my heart proud the day that Tanya had been tried for her role in my abduction, to see him sit in the court with that stony look on his face towards her; to see that she didn't have the same kind of hold over him anymore. And, as petty of me as it is, I took great delight in seeing her get sentenced to punishment for all she had done. _Only getting what you deserve, you heinous bitch._

And Jacob? To sum it up, he was sentenced to be put away for a _very_ long time. By the point where he'd be eligible for parole, he'd be in his fifties. And I had every intention of being at that parole hearing to make sure he didn't get out. _End of story_.

"You all there, darling?" The sound of Heather's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I smiled at her, basking once again in the niceness of having my whole family around me.

"You bet!" My answer was chipper, and she seemed to relax to know that I was okay. I was seated beside Heather at the table, and she glanced around at the rest of our company before speaking again.

"It's nice, isn't it?" She asked me. I nodded my head in agreement, and my fingers came up to fiddle with my locket out of habit. "Aren't you glad you let us dress you up?" She teased, a twinkle in those pretty eyes. I let out a small laugh, and shook my head ruefully.

"I don't think I had enough strength to stop the both of you." I teased back, to get another smile out of her.

"You know I love you, darling." I leaned my head against hers, as I continued to watch the people around us.

"I love you too, Heather-Feather." I glanced down and watched as she spun an old ring around her finger that said 'Bella'. "I can't believe you still have that." I had given her the ring when I had left for university almost five years earlier. She gave me a light slap on the arm in response.

"I never take it off, you know that." It made me feel so loved whenever she said that. She stopped playing with her own ring, and touched my hand where my ring from Edward rested. "Is your ring… bent?"

"Yeah…" I sighed. "Sometime during that whole ordeal, the band got dented in. Gold's not a really hard metal to begin with, plus when you add the heat from the fire…" Heather nodded, and glanced up at me.

"Could I see it?" She asked. Shrugging, I tugged the ring off of my finger and handed it to her. Heather tilted it this way and that to get a better look at the dent in it, while I went back to gazing around our table.

I watched as Jazz rested with his arm across the back of Alice's seat beside him; he was gazing at her with that soft look of a man in love, and I felt so glad that I had brought her along for dinner at the Cullen house that night so long ago. I smiled to myself as he stopped one of her tirades about fashion by kissing her gently, which was probably the only way that anyone _could_ shut Alice up. Em was telling some joke or another that resulted in Rosalie slapping him lightly across the back of the head, even as a smile twitched at the corner of her lips. My parents and Esme were commiserating about how quickly their children grow up, and I had to roll my eyes over that one. I'm sure that one day I will say the same thing about my own children, but that day hasn't come quite yet. Edward stood up from his seat at the end of the table beside me, and stared at our little group with a grin on his face. Everyone fell silent as he continued to stand there, and with the silence he began.

"Well, guys…" It was an inelegant beginning for a speech, but it was so purely Edward that it made me smile anyway. "We, as a family, have made it through a lot in the last few months. Most days I think about what happened, and it seems so unreal. Like something you'd see in a movie instead of real life. But, it left pretty deep scars nonetheless. Bella and I wouldn't have been able to handle it without the support from all of you. And, I guess I just wanted to say 'thanks' for both of us." He raised his glass towards the rest of them, before he continued on.

"Charlie, Renée…" He directed towards my parents. "You've been like a second set of parents to me for more than half my life, and I just wanted to say how much I appreciated that. Even though you weren't too pleased with my behaviour sometimes…" I thought of the incident with the blanket that had happened almost ten years ago, and still felt my cheeks heat in embarrassment. The rest of them laughed, and I had to smile along with them. "You're all family to us. And I know that Bella and I both hope that you'll be around for every good and bad moment that we have. Hopefully there'll be more good than bad in the years to come, but you get what I mean." He cleared his throat a little, not used to making such long speeches.

"So, on that note…" I watched as Edward turned to me. He held out a hand, which I took, so that I was standing with him. I smiled at him with all the love in my heart as I looked at his handsome face. Grasping both my hands, he smiled down at me in just the same way.

"Bells…" He said. "You've been one of the most important people to me for thirteen years. You've seen all of my ups and downs, my nerdy moments, and listened to my fears. All of my best memories are with you; throwing pebbles at my window, almost falling in the canal, building forts and sitting in front of the fire on snow days from school. You never gave up on me, even in the times when I gave up on myself. You have no idea how much that means to me…" I could feel my eyes get misty, even though the _last_ thing I wanted was to cry right there in front of our families.

That was when he pulled a box out of his pocket, and I felt my heart stop.

He popped the lid on it, and nestled in the cushion inside was the most gorgeous ring I had ever seen in my life. Diamonds winked at me in the dim restaurant light, and I couldn't do anything but stare at it stupidly.

"Bells…" His voice brought my head up so that I was looking at him in shock. "I want to keep making these memories with you. I want to have even more stories to tell our kids about while they grow up." He took a deep breath, and I could see the nervousness in those gorgeous eyes of his. "Marry me?"

Someone was going to have to give me CPR if I didn't make myself start breathing again soon. I forced myself to breathe, and my right hand shook as I raised it to my lips. I could feel the tears building again, and mentally screamed at myself to stop being such a wuss.

"Of course!" The statement rushed out of me with more strength to it than I thought I had in me right at that moment. All at once, I stopped shaking. _This is exactly what I've always wanted. I've always wanted him._ All tension in Edward's body eased, and he grinned that special grin that I'd always loved. He plucked the ring from its box with strong fingers, and slid it on to my ring finger.

It was then that it occurred to me that my ring finger had been bare. I glanced over at Heather, and saw her twirl my first ring from Edward around the tip of her finger, a smart-assed look on her face. _So this was why she wanted to 'see' the ring._ I glanced once again down at my new engagement ring as everyone began to clap and cheer. A solitary tear slid down my cheek from happiness, and Edward gently brushed it away with his thumb.

"How do you feel?" He asked me teasingly.

"I feel like such a girl!" I burst out, and everyone broke into laughter. Edward assured me later that it had been a very 'me' thing to say, and that he had thought it was the perfect response.

_God damn, I love this man._

**The End.**

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**A/N: Well, that's all, folks! I just wanted to take the opportunity to say a very hearty 'thank you' to all of you who have stuck by this thing. I've made this chapter almost twice as long as all the others, so I hope that was a nice little treat for you guys! And yes, I know. That ending could not have BEEN any more sappy. But, the saga that was their relationship just seemed to call for it. **

**I think that I've tied up all the loose ends. If I've missed one or two, my apologies! Big thanks to Heather for all of her prodding and inspiration for this story; it truly wouldn't have been written without her influence (In fact, she was the one that requested it in the first place).**

**I really hope that I get plenty of reviews for this one, I want to know what you guys thought about the ending. Love you all!  
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